“True.”Dougal frowned and lightly rubbed his chin. “Do ye ken what I think ye ought todo?”
“Nay,but ye are going to tell me even if I say I dinnae wish to hear it, arenae ye?”
“Aye.Ye should tell him how ye feel.”
“Dougal,I dinnae see why I should bare my soul when I have no assurances that Ruariwill do the same. And, there are some men who dinnae wish to be burdened withsuch declarations of emotion.”
“True.Some men find such sentiments an uneccessary thing, even an irritation. Thereare also men who would truly appreciate learning that the lass they have takenas their wife is in love with them, even if they dinnae feel such a depth ofemotion themselves. And, of course, there is always the chance that he cannaespeak of love until he is quite sure it is returned.”
Sorchastared at her brother for a full minute before whispering, “Oh.”
“Aye,oh. Ye being such a clever lass, I am surprised ye didnae consider thatpossibility,” Dougal drawled, then grinned when she glared at him. “Someonemust go first and, fair or not, it will probably be ye who must do so.”
Shecursed softly for she knew he was right. “I must overcome my fears because hewillnae overcome his, is that it?”
“Aye.Ye see, he can probably muddle along quite happily enough, even though ye neverspeak of love, but I think ye will find it most painful to go through the yearsand ne’er hear him speak of it.”
“Mayhap,but I think I shall need some more time to gain the courage I need.”
“Thenconsider this—if ye speak of love tonight and he doesnae return it, ye couldsay that ye were caught up in the strong emotion of the weddings. He willbelieve that and set the incident aside. ‘Tis the only time ye could use suchan excuse and have it work for ye.”
Beforeshe could discuss the matter any further, Ruari waved to her to join him beforethe priest at the altar. As Margaret and Neil stepped up beside Beatham andMalcolm, Sorcha gave Dougal a brief kiss upon the cheek, then walked up to takehold of Ruari’s extended hand.
Hesmiled at her, and she smiled back, even though her heart was suddenly in herthroat. What was she thinking of? Ruari looked every inch the strong, wealthylaird in his finely embroidered black jupon. What could she possibly offer aman like that?
Asthe six of them knelt before the priest who began the service, Sorcha peeked ather aunt and cousin. Both women looked radiant and calm, confident in the loveof their men. As they repeated their vows they exchanged tender glances withtheir husbands. Sorcha fought back an attack of jealousy and centered herattention on the priest. The little chapel was filled to overflowing with Haysand Kerrs, and she wanted none of them to guess that she was feeling anythingbut that same confidence and joy.
Thewedding feast in the great hall had been going on for several hours when Sorchasaw Beatham and Margaret sneak away. On the morrow the young couple would leavefor their new home, the peel tower Ruari had so generously gifted them with.Neil and Malcolm would travel to Dunweare, staying there long enough to see ifMalcolm could help Dunweare enrich itself, before returning to a small cottageon the edge of the village outside of Gartmhor. Sorcha realized that aftertonight she would truly be alone with her new husband and she felt a smallchill of fear. Since the day she had first seen Ruari, she had had one or moreof her family always close at hand. Now she would be completely alone withRuari, with a man she loved deeply but who might not love her at all. Sorchaknew that it was the closeness of her family that had kept her from dwellingtoo long on this issue. What would she do without their words of comfort orencouragement or their ability to distract her from feeling sorry for herself?
Neilapproached her, and Sorcha knew that her aunt and her new husband would soonslip away as well. Her aunt easily brushed aside the occasional ribald remarktossed her way, grinning and responding with ones equally risqué. Sorcha hopedthat she could be as sanguine when she and Ruari had to leave the great hall.She exchanged a brief kiss on the cheek with her aunt and smiled at the woman.
“Ihope ye are happy, Aunt Neil,” Sorcha said quietly.
“Aye,”replied Neil. “Verra happy. Ye should try to be happy as weel,” she added in asoft voice so that Ruari, who was laughing and joking with Rosse, could notoverhear.
“Iam verra happy, too,” she answered in an equally soft voice and frowned whenNeil made a sharp noise of disbelief. “I am.”
“Somewheredeep in your heart ye may be, but what I saw in your eyes as I walked over herewas fear and sadness. Dinnae look so concerned, child. Ye hide it weel. Lass,ye have a good mon there.”
“Iken it.”
“Andmayhap ye would ken a few more things if ye would just put aside pride and fearand talk to the mon. Mayhap the only reason ye dinnae ken how he feels about yeis because he waits to learn how ye feel about him.”
“Thatis what Dougal said.”
“Itseems the lad may finally be using what wit he has beneath all that bonniehair.” Neil grinned when Sorcha giggled, but she quickly grew serious again. “TellRuari what lies in your heart, lass. Aye, there is a risk, but there can alsobe great reward.”
Sorchawatched her aunt stride away. She had to smile when Neil grabbed Malcolm by thehand and dragged him from the great hall inspiring a lot of laughter and many acolorful remark. Malcolm beamed, something he had been doing a great deal ofsince the marriage ceremony, his pride in having Neil as his wife steeling himagainst all embarrassment.
“Theregoes a couple all of Scotland will wonder at,” murmured Ruari as he took Sorcha’shand in his and brushed a kiss over her knuckles. “We should retire soonourselves.”
Shenodded, flushing slightly beneath the heat of his gaze. Despite his protestsand complaints, she had stayed out of his bed until they were married. She hadnot liked the idea of climbing out of his bed in the morning, getting married,and then climbing back into his bed. It would have made the marriage ceremonyand their exchange of vows feel like little more than one extra duty theyneeded to perform. She wanted to have at least some hint of anticipation on herwedding night. She was pleased, however, that the fact that they had beenlovers had made a bedding ceremony a pointless gesture and so she would nothave to endure that.
“Idinnae suppose the guests will be sweet and courteous and allow us to slip awayin peace and quiet,” she said, inwardly grimacing at the thought of all thecolorful remarks she would have to suffer.
“Nay,I dinnae suppose they will. Shall we run this gauntlet now?”
“Aye,”she muttered as he stood up and tugged her to her feet causing everyone to looktheir way. “I dinnae suppose we could just run all the way to our bedchamber.”
