“There.I saved ye from spending the rest of your life asking people who that woman atthe head of the table is.”
“Wretch.”
Sheslid her hands down to his hips and winked at him. She knew there were a lot ofquestions she should ask, such as exactly why he wanted to marry her. It waseasy to push them all aside. There was no promise that he would answer herquestions in the way she wanted him to, and she wanted nothing to spoil thepleasure and passion of their reunion.
Sorchaalso knew that she did not wish to chance Ruari answering in a way that wouldmake her hesitate to marry him. She could ride along on her hopes and happinessfor now and face the consequences of that blindness later. Even if he did notlove her as she loved him, she was confident that he had some feelings for her.That would be enough. She could spend their years together continuing to try togain his heart. The frightening thought that she might never succeed in thatgoal was pushed aside. It was even more frightening to think of the years aheadspent alone, Ruari forever out of her reach. It was better to have a littlethan nothing at all.
“Doye realize that ye have never asked me to marry you? Ye just told Dougal andnow just informed me,” she said and smiled at his surprise.
“Iam a fool. I had intended to ask ye properly when we returned from our ride,but the arrival of Simon Treacher and then of your brother rather spoiled myplans.” He touched a soft, warm kiss to her mouth and asked solemnly, “Will yemarry me, Sorcha Hay?”
“Aye,Sir Kerr, I would be most honored to wed you.”
Shegave herself over to his fierce kiss. His response to her acceptance washopeful. This was not to be a cold arrangement. Ruari truly wanted to marryher, penniless and landless though she was. He had seen his other choices anddecided that he wanted to spend his days with her. She tried to convinceherself that that was enough.
Dougalcursed and shifted in his saddle, wiping the dust from his brow with hissleeve. He acknowledged Robert when the man rode up beside him with a curt nodof his head. It had been a long, hard ride from Dunweare and now Gartmhor wasin sight. They had failed to catch Sorcha and her little band of traitors.Dougal heartily cursed that failure, for he suffered all the ill effects of aharried journey but had gained nothing for the trouble.
“Icannae believe Sorcha would betray me like this,” he muttered.
“Thelass hasnae betrayed you,” snapped Robert. “I grow weary of hearing ye speak ofthe lass and her companions as if they have just sold ye to the English orcrept into your bedchambers and cut your throat so that they could take whatlittle ye possess.”
“Yejust say that because one of her companions is your son.”
“Nay,I say it because ye condemn them for a heinous crime when the most they havedone is disobey your orders.”
“Theyare supposed to obey their laird.”
“Aye,and they will, if ye give them reasonable commands.” Robert shook his head and,unhooking his waterskin from the pommel of his saddle, had a long drink beforeoffering it to a scowling Dougal. “Ye made it impossible for them to doanything else but disobey ye.”
“AmI to expect everyone to obey or disobey as they see fit? ‘Twill be naught butchaos at Dunweare.”
“Yemade a decision without any regard to the feelings of three women in your care,women who have done verra weel by ye in the past. Remember who ransomed ye.They also spent two long weeks trying to talk to ye and let ye ken how theyfelt, but ye refused to heed them.”
“Icarefully explained why they couldnae marry a Kerr. They refused to heed me.”Dougal scowled toward Gartmhor. “They chose their lovers over me.”
“Yeforced them to it. I dinna ken what to say to ye, lad. Ye take this far toomuch to heart yet seem unable to understand the hearts of the women in yourhousehold. They love these Kerr men. They love ye. None of them wished to beforced to make a choice between ye or their lovers, but ye allowed them nocompromise.”
“Therewas no compromise to be found. To join my family to Ruari Kerr’s after all hehad done would make me look the fool. Worse than that, it makes me look thesort of mon who would swallow his pride and honor for the sake of making goodmarriages for his womenfolk.”
“Ah,is that the burr in your braies, then?”
“Nay,not completely. I just dinnae understand why they couldnae do as I ask. Thereare many men in Scotland. They could find other lovers.”
Robertcursed and shook his head. “Ye need to fall in love, lad. ‘Tis clear that thereare a great many lessons in life ye have failed to learn. Aye, some women couldshrug aside one lover and soon find another. Not these women. In truth, of allthe Hay women I have kenned in my long time at Dunweare, I have kenned none whocould be so easy in their affections.”
Dougalfrowned, handed Robert back his waterskin, and looked toward Gartmhor again.Robert was right about one thing; he did not understand love. He did notunderstand why his usually cheerful Aunt Neil and his sister had lost so muchof their spirit. He certainly did not understand why Margaret had wept so often.The other women in his household had begun to look at him as if he were theworst sort of heartless beast. Standing firm on his decision had been anextremely tiring position to hold.
“Weel,we cannae sit here staring at the hulking lump of stone for the rest of whatlittle remains of the day,” Dougal grumbled. “Let us go and see what price thatarrogant bastard Ruari Kerr will claim for the stupidity of my kinswomen.”
Robertcursed softly, but quickly followed Dougal as the young laird rode toward thehigh walls of Gartmhor. “Just try to keep a rein on your temper, Dougal Hay. Yecannae help matters if ye ride in there demanding things as if ye are the kingof Scotland.”
“AllI intend to demand is that the bastard gives me back the women he has stolenfrom me—again.”
Ruaribrought Sorcha a full tankard of cider and sat on the edge of his huge bed. Hewatched her as she drank and wondered yet again how she had come to be the onlywoman he wanted. She was so different from all of the other ladies he hadconsidered, yet she was definitely the one he desired and needed. She mightnever give him a son, she did not offer him a handsome dowry, and her home wasfull of the largest collection of strange people he had ever had the misfortuneto know, yet he was content to marry her. He just wished she would give himmore than an agreement to marry him.
Love,with all its turmoil, was what he wanted. He loved her and he desperatelywanted her to love him back. He could not be completely satisfied with just herpassion and whatever meager scraps of emotion she felt inclined to serve him.One way to discover exactly what she did feel was to ask her outright, but hefound that he was a coward. He was not happy not knowing, but he dreadedhearing her say she did not love him, only cared for him and enjoyed hisloving.
“Yeare staring at me verra hard,” Sorcha murmured as she finished her drink andset the tankard on the table by the bed.
