From listening to conversations she had not been supposed to hear she had learned that her mother had been with child when her parents married. That had stunned her when she had reached an age to fully understand all the ramifications of such a thing. It was truly the kind of scandalous behavior her mother had never revealed any inclination for and had often lectured her daughters thoroughly on any behavior she seemed to think was worthy of scandal. Now Emily understood that, in so many ways, the freedom of choice had been taken away from her mother by her own lack of restraint.
It was sad but a part of her was angry that her mother had not made a better effort to make herself happy. Her father had not been a bad man compared to many another husband and at some point her mother had obviously found him attractive enough. Now she rather understood what could have happened. Iain had shown her the heady power of need and passion. She promised herself she would be careful. There was no need of a forced or arranged marriage here but there was always a chance of finding herself carrying the child of a man who could not love her but would feel compelled to marry her. She needed to guard against that chance. Perhaps, she thought as sleep started to nudge at her, it was past time she turned cold to him.
* * *
Iain lay in his bed staring at the ceiling. It was going to be a while before his body relaxed enough for him to find sleep. This time telling himself he needed to go visit one of the girls at the Trading Post brought nothing but a feeling of distaste. That did not please him and he knew that was a sign of trouble. The girls at the Trading Post could ease the sharp bite of need but he realized it would never help him to stop wanting Emily Stanton.
He then realized he had not once thought of Emily as a lady tonight, as one of Lady Vera’s ilk. That cold fury at gentry had not rushed in to cool his interest or make him angry about feeling it. In the days she had been at the house he had somehow separated her from that class of woman. He knew it had been unreasonable to ever think of her that way but the fact that he no longer did seemed another sign of trouble to him.
“Oh, hell,” he muttered.
* * *
Emily opened her eyes and stretched. The sight of Neddy’s empty cot pushed aside the lazy pleasure she was enjoying and she sat up. Her door was ajar and she could hear voices in the kitchen. She had slept past breakfast call. Blushing, she got up and gathered her clothes, slipping behind the privacy screen that had been brought in so she could dress. Quickly running a brush through her hair, she tied it back with a ribbon and rushed down the stairs, ignoring the occasional twinges in her leg.
“Oh, I am sorry, Mrs. O’Neal,” she said as she stepped into the kitchen and saw everyone seated and eating. “I should have been up to help you.”
“Nonsense. You clearly needed your sleep. I have been making the food for this lot for a long time. Have your breakfast.” She set a plate of eggs and ham in front of where Emily usually sat. “I saved you some in case you came even later.”
“Thank you, Mrs. O’Neal.”
Emily did her best to ignore Iain as she ate. She knew if she looked at him even once her blushes would tell everyone at the table far more than she wanted them to know. It was difficult to keep anything secret from such a large group of people. Somehow she was going to have to train herself to not think of kisses or touches when she looked at him.
Finished with her meal, she looked up and found everyone gone until she turned to the side. Iain straddled the bench at her side, studying her carefully. As she frowned at him she felt the burn of a blush on her cheeks and inwardly cursed.
“You do not have any work today?” she asked.
“Always have work but today is my day off.”
“You get one?”
“Aye, I get one though I dinnae often take one. I am about to head out to clean out the stables. They need it and it will save me having to see it done tomorrow. What do ye plan to do?”
“Clean. I think today I will attempt to clean the dining room.”
“Why? It looks clean to me.”
“Well, you are a man.”
He laughed abruptly. “You have been around Mrs. O’Neal too much. Truly, why do you want to clean the dining room?”
“A good hard clean and not just a sweep and a dust. I have decided to do a room a day and by winter this place will be pristine.”
“Still dinnae see why it needs it.” He shook his head as he stood up then leaned toward her and gave her a quick kiss. “Dinnae exhaust yourself and set your healing back. We are happy with just clean and dinnae needpristine.”
Before she could get over her shock at that surprise kiss and tell him she was healed enough to work as hard as anyone else, he was gone. She shook her head then wondered where Mrs. O’Neal had gone as she took her dishes to the sink. Seeing that no one had washed up yet, she rolled up her sleeves and got busy.
She frowned as she thought about Iain. He had actually been pleasant to her, chatting as if they were old friends. The kiss had been a light brush of affection. The man had too many moods. Just as she got adjusted to his passion followed by cold anger, he found yet another mood to confuse her with. Emily supposed she would have to find a way to treat each change with calm.
She was wiping dry the last pan when Mrs. O’Neal came bustling back into the kitchen. “Oh, child, you did not have to do that.”
“They were there and needed cleaning.”
“Well, thank you kindly. Had a small emergency with Rory. The child has a deep and abiding fear of wasps and one was flying around too near to him. So had to go to his rescue.”
Emily laughed softly. “I can fully understand the fear of wasps.”
“Nasty devils. So what do you have planned for today?”
