Looking at Islaen's waist which was no longer tiny, Storm sighed and nodded. “I think ye are lucky he has not seen it yet."
"He mentioned that my figure was growing a wee bit fuller but, ere I could fumble with a reply, said he supposed I was just finishing my growing. He sees me as a child, I think."
"Not too much or ye would not be with child."
"There is a blessing. I think too that he sees the years atween us as more than they are.” She stood up. “Weel, best I sort out this mess."
"I will help."
"Nay, ‘tis my temper that set it all awry."
"Ye can help me next time I have one."
Islaen laughed. “Fair enough.” She grew somber as she picked up a gown. “I think t'would nay be so upsetting an I could ken for certain that he doesnae put me from his thoughts as he easily as he puts me from his sight, that mayhaps he thinks on us, our marriage and all. Ye ken what I mean, on what we dinnae have and what we could have."
"I feel certain he does."
Smiling faintly Islaen did not reply, but concentrated upon cleaning up the mess she had made. She wished she could have faith in such assurances but she could not. When a man was so determined to keep a distance from a woman, it seemed very reasonable to think that he would learn to put that woman from his thoughts as easily as he did his arms.
Turning from giving her horse a treat, Islaen watched Wallace, the stablemaster, tend a calf. She had often watched him with the animals and recognized the man's skill. Lately she had found herself thinking a lot about that man's skill and knowledge. The idea she had was a wild one but she had been unable to discard it. She decided she might as well give it a try. There was nothing to lose in trying and, if her wild thoughts and ideas were right, a lot to gain not only for her own sake but for Iain's. As she moved towards the man he suddenly moved to take her by the arm and gently lead her to a seat.
"Ye shouldnae walk about the animals too much, m'lady, not in your condition. Ye set here if ye are of a mind to watch."
"My condition?” she asked calmly.
He frowned at her before turning back to the calf. “Aye the bairn. Didnae ye ken it?"
"Aye, I but wonder how ye did as no one else has, and I have told only Storm and Meg."
"Och, weel, I have seen the look on the mares and all weel enough to ken.” He flushed and looked at her nervously. “I didnae mean..."
"Dinnae apologize. When a mon loves animals as much as ye do ‘tis no insult to be compared to them. Aye and with ones like that chestnut mare of Storm's ‘tis a compliment, for they are verra fine indeed.” She smiled at him and he briefly smiled back. “Mayhaps ye ken what I wish to talk to ye about then."
"I dinnae ken naught about bairns, m'lady."
"Be it all so different from foals and calves?"
Wallace stared at her for a moment, then sat down by her feet. “Nay, I dinnae think it is. Are ye afraid?"
"I think every woman holds some fear of birth. Wallace, I am going to confide in ye."
"Ye can trust me, m'lady."
"Aye, I ken it. Do ye ken Iain's fear of childbirth?"
"Aye, m'lady, ‘tis no secret though he doesnae ken that, I'm thinking."
"Nay, possibly not."
"Is that why ye say naught about the bairn?"
"Aye, that and the fact that, when we were wed, he,” she felt herself color but took a deep steadying breath and continued, “made me promise I would do something to make sure I ne'er got with bairn."
"Oh."
"Aye, oh. I didnae do it. I decided the lie was less a sin than what he asked. I also feel sure I can show him that all women need not suffer as his late wife did. That fear he holds must be conquered. If left to fester t'would bring sorrow to both of us. I want bairns and I feel most certain he does too."
"Aye, m'lady. I am sure he does. Ye can see it in the way he is with his brither's bairns."
