Liam glanced a couple of times at Kate as he prepared the coffee. She ran her fingers over the couch’s leather upholstery as if she’d never sat on Italian leather before. Maybe she hadn’t. It would explain why she was perched at the edge of the couch, as if afraid to mar it with her presence.
“How do you take it?” he asked, pouring a black one for himself.
“Fully loaded, please.”
He cocked an eyebrow. “What was that about sugar-free?”
“What? I’m not a martyr. Besides, coffee with no sugar is a deal breaker. Of course, if you have any Stevia root in those cupboards, I’d take that instead.” She raised her head and watched him work. “So, I take it Bridget’s your ex?”
He brought the two mugs over, setting them on the pastry tray. “Yeah. We were together for a couple of years.”
“Married?”
“No. Thank God for small mercies.”
She picked up her mug and took a demure sip. He imagined the hot, sweet liquid warming a path down her throat. Despite the emotional upheaval of the past ten minutes, he imagined dragging his tongue over her.Jesus Christ. Get your shit together.She licked her lips, snapping him out of his funk.
Her staring at him made him feel uncomfortable but consoled at the same time. He didn’t think anyone had ever inspired that feeling before. She seemed to consider her next words carefully. “Tell me about her. Were you happy together?”
He ran a hand through his hair, experiencing a familiar sense of unease. “We didn’t have a typical relationship. We’d been friends for some time, ran in the same circles. When her husband took off with another woman, I was there for her. After a while, it just seemed convenient to sleep together.”
“So she wasn’t your grand passion then?”
He grinned. “No. I guess I always knew she wasn’t over Andy, but I fooled myself into believing their relationship was done. He’d married her and then decided he wasn’t quite finished sowing his wild oats. Even started divorce proceedings. He left her just as she realized she was pregnant.”
“Charming.”
“Yeah, I thought so too. Anyway, Bridget accepted my help, and it seemed to make sense that friends could be lovers. I convinced myself I cared more than I did, and she swore she wanted nothing more to do with him.”
“It didn’t bother you she was pregnant with another man’s child?”
“At first, I just thought I could give her some support. Once she started showing, I got excited. I told myself we could be a family. Looking back, I realize a part of me really wanted to be a dad. I never had much of a family life, you see. I guess I craved stability, or at least liked the idea of giving it to someone else.”
As soon as he spied the look of empathy in her eyes, he forgot about the hostile circumstances in which they met. He was just appreciative having her there, showing some kindness.
“I treated Michelle like my own. Bridget was grateful, but gratitude isn’t the same as love.” He scratched his chin. “For a while, we had fun playing family. But as much as I loved that little girl, her mom and I couldn’t fake it very long. The chemistry just wasn’t there. We argued over stupid things. Made a lot of mistakes. But I held on for Michelle. Trust me. Staying for the kid never makes it better.”
She sighed, as if she understood completely. “What happened?”
Liam sucked in a breath. “My job kept us apart. I work a lot of nights and after a while I realized I was staying longer and longer at the office. I was right in the middle of making plans for this place and life was hectic. When I did give myself a day off, she purposely kept away, as if to punish me.
“Then one day she went out with friends and left her cell phone behind. It rang, and I answered, thinking it might be her calling home. It was Andy. I saw his name on the display. As soon as he realized it wasn’t her on the phone, he hung up.”
He stared at his coffee mug, wishing he could drown in its dark depths. “I accused her of seeing him behind my back. She didn’t even deny it. Andy had said he still loved her, that he was sorry, and that he wanted to be a father to his child.”
Kate’s face turned down. “That must have been horrible for you.”
“It was a fucking nightmare,” he admitted in a quiet voice. “I love that little girl with all my heart. But at the end of the day, Michelle’s not my biological daughter, even if I was there when she was born.”
She shook her head, but said nothing.
“I don’t even have words to describe what I went through. I’ve been in a very dark place since then. The only thing that keeps me sane is my work.” And no matter how much his doctor suggested he reduce his hours, working less meant more time to think about what he’d lost.
“And now you want custody?” She spoke in quiet, tentative tones.
“Can you blame me?”
“Not really, but sole custody? They are her parents.”
