MILKING HER BEEFCAKE
AN FM ALIEN ABDUCTION DARK ROMANCE
VIVIAN MURDOCH
CHAPTER ONE
ETHAN
You’ll never get clean.
The words pound through my brain as harshly as if spoken next to me. Groaning, I turn my head, gritting my teeth as pain blossoms through my skull.
So much for keeping New Year's resolutions. The moment the ball dropped on New Year’s Eve, I kissed a random woman and vowed that this was the year I’d finally get sober. Fat chance.
Even now, as I lie there in what I’m sure is a puddle of my own fluids, my fingers graze the surface of whatever object I’m calling a bed for the familiar pill. Just one. All I need is one. Once I take that, I’ll drift into oblivion and not even care. But then, that’s what got me into this mess.
A soft groan flits through my lips as an incessant hum buzzes in my ears. It’s almost like talking, but not quite. I can’t figure out the words. Try as I might, they sound alien to me. Foreign. I probably left the tv on. Netflix and chill? More like Netflix and pass the fuck out.
I try shifting my weight, hoping to not crush the girl beneath me, but she makes no sounds of protest. Becky, was it? Jennifer? Jessica? Chloe? The names of all my conquests fly through mybrain at rapid speed until the need to hurl rises in my throat like vile acid.
No. None of those sound right.
You’ll never get clean.
I suppose my manager is right. Any time I try, I somehow get sucked back in. Pain sizzles over my skin as I move a bit more fervently, desperation fueling my movements as I look for the pill I know is around here somewhere. It would just be easier if Jeffery gave me an actual bottle... but then, we both know what that would look like.
If the desperation I have for just one pill is this bad, then God knows what I would do with a full bottle. It’s honestly for the best if he keeps them for me and rations them out when I need them. Problem is, I need one now and don’t feel like I have the energy to move enough even to call him.
You’ll never get clean.
Again, I wince as the sounds slice through me, as if the words alone cut through my skull and open up my brain. Even now, I feel the heat flowing over my face as I leak out onto the floor. Is this what death feels like? Can’t be. It’s far too warm and languid.
Turning my head, I rest my cheek against the cool sheets. Seems as if my date is no longer there, providing her breast as a cushion. No matter. I can get along without her. I’ve done it countless nights so far.
I lie there, forcing air into my lungs as I try to wake up. It’s as if I’m underwater and can’t quite reach the surface. It’s the first time the pills have ever made me feel like this. Perhaps I had far more to drink than I realized.
But then... Jeffery kept the bottles and shots coming. He knew what I was taking. He would never give me so much that it hurts me. Would he?
Even as that thought surfaces in my brain, I try to shake my head. He’s always been an excellent manager and confidant. If anything, he’d stop me before anything bad truly happened.
I don’t trust those city folk, my dad murmurs into my ear. They only care about one thing, and that’s themselves.Not that he’s wrong, but Jeffery is different.
He’s not different. He’s just like all the rest.
Hot tears scald my eyes as I squeeze everything so tightly it nearly robs my breath. Dad’s one to talk. Between him and Jeffery, my manager is more like a dad to me than my father will ever be.
When I came to Jeffrey with my problems, he listened. He didn’t tell me to suck it up or get out. He didn’t force me to choose between what I loved and who I was.
When the emotional pain of getting cut off from my family hit, Jeffery was there to help pick me up. Hell, when Gorgeous Global Models asked Dad for complete power of attorney over me, he didn’t bat an eye. He signed me over to them and took my brothers out to get that day’s milk.
Jeffery never made me feel unwanted. He never made me feel less than. If only I could get my heart and mind to agree. I’m tired of hearing my dad’s voice in my head. It’s relentless, only stopped by that precious pill. The one thing that can make the world stop. Even if it’s just for the briefest of moments.
Never trust those city folk. And yet, he gave them the one thing that should have been precious to him. A soft growl rips from my throat as I force my eyes to open. Time to send Cindy or whoever she is, on her way so I can get ready for today’s shoot.
That is, if she’s not already gone with my money and dignity. A snort wrinkles my nose. Dignity. That’s a new one.
“Okay,” I grumble, flailing my arms around as I try to roll over onto my stomach. “You’ve fucked Glorious Abs of the Year. Time to get you back to your groupie friends.”
