In my office, I took my seat behind my desk. The red light on my phone was flashing, signaling I had a stack of voicemails waiting to be listened to. I probably had a mountain of emails to wade through, but I couldn’t do any of it. All I could do was sit and think about the morning, about the night before, about her.
I wondered what she was doing, what she was thinking. She seemed to be more sure than I was, yet I still worried that she might change her mind. And I prayed that she would change her mind, and that she wouldn’t.
The thing was, I didn’t want to want her, but I did. I had to have her, no matter how many times I told myself that it was wrong. She was a constant game of tug-of-war with myself. I never knew which side would win: the side that wanted her and didn’t care if it was wrong, or the side of me that wanted her but tried to play by the rules.
There wasn’t a side of me that didn’t want her, and that was the biggest problem of all. It didn’t matter how old she was. It didn’t matter that she was technically my employee. It didn’t matter that she was the sister of my dead wife.
All that mattered was the hunger I had for her. It wasn’t the kind of hunger that could be quieted by throwing something else at it. This was a particular kind of hunger, a craving that wouldn’t let up until I gave myself what I wanted.
The day passed slowly, but I managed to get some work done. All I could do was relive every moment I’d spent with her, from the very first kiss up until that morning when she was naked in the shower. Every minute I spent with her on my mind only made my cock get harder. By the time I got home that evening, my balls were aching and in desperate need of relief. I couldn’t approach her the way I would anyone else, though. I thought about bending her over and fucking her senseless the moment I walked in, but I had to push those thoughts away. Maybe one day I could do that, but it wouldn’t be any time soon. She needed her first time to be perfect, not some cheap fuck just to get off. I wanted to show her all the things I could do for her.
She and Sophia were in the kitchen, preparing dinner when I arrived.
“Daddy!” Sophia yelled when I entered the kitchen. She jumped down from her chair, ran across the room, and wrapped her arms around my legs.
I bent down and picked her up, carrying her to the island where Sasha was chopping vegetables. It occurred to me that it was the first time I’d picked my daughter up in a long time. The guilt of how I’d let her down hit me hard, nearly making me double over.
“Are you helping cook dinner?” I asked, looking down at her cutting board and plastic butter knife.
“Yep,” she said.
Sasha chuckled. “She tried talking me into giving her a real knife, but I thought we’d better wait a little longer.”
Sophia frowned, making us both chuckle.
“Why don’t you go wash your hands, Soph. Then you can show Daddy the picture you drew for him today.”
She squealed, her eyes lighting up.
“OK!” She wiggled until I put her down, and then she ran out of the room.
I watched her until she rounded the corner. When I turned back, Sasha was standing at the sink, her back to me. I stepped up behind her, pressing my groin against her ass as I placed my lips at her ear. She was so much smaller than I was. Hell, she was even smaller than Chloe had been.
“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you all day.” I kissed the spot just below her earlobe.
She smiled and shut off the water, tilting her head to the side so I could press kisses to her neck. “I haven’t either.”
My hands found her hips as I kissed over the warm vein in her throat. “I was thinking that maybe we could have a date night? Unless you have plans, of course.”
She turned to face me. “I would love a date, but how can we do that?” She wrapped her arms around my neck. “If I’m nothere to watch Sophia, you have to be. And if you can’t, you’ll have to ask Monica why we’re going out together. What are we going to tell her?”
She had a point, and until we knew what we were doing, I didn’t want anyone to know. “We’ll have a date night in. Get Sophia put to bed and then we’ll start our date.” I dipped my head forward, kissing her softly. “How’s that sound?”
She smiled as her eyes locked with mine. “I like the sound of that,” she agreed.
“Daddy! Daddy!” Sophia yelled, making me pull away quickly. I turned toward the door and watched as she ran into the kitchen with a piece of paper in her hand.
I knelt and took the drawing, looking it over. “Who’s this?”
“It’s me,” she said, pointing to the smallest person on the page. “You,” she pointed to the tallest. “And it’s Sasha.” She pointed at the medium-sized one with the long, dark hair. There was a yellow sun in the sky and green grass beneath our feet. There was a tree, a swing set, and birds against a puffy, lopsided cloud.
“I love it. Thank you, princess.”
She threw her arms around my neck and hugged me.
“In fact, I think this one deserves its own place on the fridge.” I stood and put the drawing on the fridge, holding it against the door with a magnet. When I turned to look back at her, she was smiling widely, clearly proud of herself.
Several hours later,Sophia was sound asleep in bed, leaving Sasha and me to our little date night. I wasn’t sure whatour date would consist of. It had been a long time since I’d been on a date.
