It felt like time stopped with that chuckle. It was a sound I hadn’t heard in years. I stood up straight and looked down at him. He was lying on the bed with his feet on the floor. His arms were above his head, his hands rubbing his tired eyes. My attention raked across the bare side of his chest, noticing every toned muscle that was exposed on his stomach. My eyes moved down that trail of hair, and to the firmness in his jeans.
My face heated.
As his laugh died down, he moved his arms back to his sides, and his eyes opened, locking with mine. Something in the air changed between us. It was like an electrical current. I could practically hear the sound of power popping and zapping between us. He cleared his throat, and in an instant, it was all gone.
He sat up on the side of the bed and tugged his shirt off completely. He wadded it up and threw it aside.
“Thanks for your help, but you can go now.” He bent forward as he lifted his foot to remove his shoe, but he lost his balance and went rushing toward the floor, headfirst.
“Oh my god,” I said, leaping forward.
I grabbed his shoulders and pushed him backward until he was sitting upright on the bed.
“Let me,” I said, dropping to my knees.
I untied his shoe and pulled it off his foot. I set the shoe on the floor and ran my fingers up his pant leg, where I grabbed the top of his white sock. I worked it down his ankle and off his foot, tossing it aside before moving to the other, where I repeated the process. When I was finished, I made the mistake of looking up at him.
“You look nothing like her,” he muttered quietly.
“Wha?” The word fell away when he grabbed my face, cupping my cheeks in both hands as his eyes moved over every feature of my face.
“You look nothing like her,” he said again. “How’s that even possible?”
“She took after our mom. I take after our dad,” I told him, locked in his stare. My stomach tightened with anticipation, and my entire body heated under his gaze. It wasn’t an uncomfortable heat, though. It was something else. Something unfamiliar.
“I’m glad you don’t look like her. She haunts me, you know?” With his hand against my jaw, he ran the tip of his thumb along the line of my lower lip.
“I know,” was all I could say, nodding gently.
He wet his lips, and I swear he leaned in a fraction of an inch. Then his hands fell away from my face as he let out a breath.
“What the fuck am I doing?” he murmured, shaking his head. “I remember when you were just a kid. You used to follow my every step,” he said, scooting back on the bed until he was in the center. He lay down and rolled to his side, facing away from me. “Turn the light out when you leave.”
I shook my head clear of confusion, and I stood, rushing toward the door. My heart was pounding in my chest as I gasped for air.
I thought…
I shook my head, telling myself how stupid I was. There was no way he was going to kiss me… Even though that’s what I thought was going to happen.
I turned off the light and exited, pulling the door closed behind me as I raced toward my room. I didn’t stop until I was alone inside. I closed the door and then pressed my back against it. The butterflies in my stomach were alive and soaring through my body, tickling me from the inside out. I clenched my stomach muscles as I squeezed my thighs together, needing to get control over myself.
I thought he was going to kiss me. That thought wouldn’t leave me alone, and it was enough to make me panic. I felt more than anxious. I felt… let down. I wasn’t disappointed that, for a brief moment, he thought about kissing me. I was bummed that he decided against it.
I felt disgusted with myself.
How fucked up did I have to be to want a kiss from a man who was ten years older than me, from a man who was technically my brother-in-law, from a man who was a total asshole and treated me like trash?
Pretty messed up.
I blamed it on my issues with my ex and how maybe it was me trying to have a sliver of revenge, even though he wasn’t here to witness it.
I pushed myself away from the door and crawled back into bed. I didn’t bother with going back to my reading. Instead, I turned off the light and forced myself to go to sleep, despite how amped up my body was.
When I wokein the morning, I wasn’t surprised to find him already gone. There was a note on the island that said he had left for work. He thanked me for helping him the night before, and he reminded me of my duty to have dinner on the table when he got home. I rolled my eyes, wadded up the note, and tossed it into the trash.
What in the hell was I thinking? How could I have wanted that kiss? I was harder up than I felt after finding my boyfriend cheating on me with someone who was supposed to be my best friend.
I pushed it all away as I moved over to make some coffee and start on breakfast.
