Having reached the long ride of oak and beech trees that marked the boundary of her late sister’s large estate, they stopped walking. The dogs played in the undergrowth nearby, sniffing and rustling about in the snowy bushes, no doubt catching the scent of a rabbit.
‘Please don’t cry. Honestly, he’s not worth it.’ Yet Selina’s protest was half-hearted. She herself had cried for weeks over Johnny’s betrayal, and later shed tears of pure fury over her neighbour Cameron Bourne when she discovered that he too had been playing her for a fool. Sometimes it was better to get the grief out and not let it fester. Selina gave Nancy a quick hug, seeing how cold and pale she had become. ‘What I don’t understand,’ she added with a frown, ‘is why you came here, asking for work as a nanny. By your own admission, you already knew by then that you were pregnant.’
Nancy’s weeping intensified. ‘It … It wasn’t my idea,’ she sobbed, burying her face in her hands.
‘Here, take my hanky. It’s clean.’ Selina was perplexed. ‘But whose idea was it, then?’
‘I was so scared, I tried to pretend it wasn’t happening at first. But when my clothes started to get tight, I knew it couldn’t be long before people started to guess. So I told my parents.’
‘I take it they weren’t particularly supportive?’
Nancy sniffed into the hanky. ‘They threw me out.’
Even though she had half suspected this, Selina was still shocked to hear it confirmed. ‘My goodness. In your condition?’
‘My father was furious,’ Nancy said, barely coherent. ‘He called me horrid names … Told me to pack a bag and never come back. Behind his back, my mother gave me money for the train and suggested I should come here. She urged me to be honest with you about the baby and pray you’d take me in, since Sebastian and I were cousins.’
Selina felt a flurry of frustration. ‘I wish you had been honest.’
‘I know it was wrong to lie to you, but I was so frightened.’ Nancy raised a tear-stained face, her eyes fixed on Selina’s. ‘Please say you won’t throw me out … I’ve nowhere else to go.’
Faced with that pleading look, Selina knew she had no choice. Besides, her real fury lay with Nancy’s parents, who had thrown their pregnant daughter out into the streets with nothing but a suitcase of clothes and the train fare to Bodmin. ‘Of course I won’t turn you away. You made a very silly mistake. But it isn’t the end of the world.’ She was thinking hard, still unsure how to deal with the situation. ‘I mean, it’s a bit tricky. I’m not sure what we should tell people once you begin to show, or even if Thornton Hall is the best place for you to have a baby.’ At Nancy’s apprehensive look, she shook her head. ‘But clearly you must stay here for the time being. So please don’t worry.’
‘Oh, thank you so much. And I can still look after the girls,’ Nancy insisted, her face brightening. ‘Nobody need know the truth yet. I’ve been wearing my baggiest clothes,trying to hide my tummy. Though I know that won’t work forever.’
‘No,’ Selina agreed. ‘But I see no reason why you shouldn’t keep working for the time being. Peter doesn’t need a nanny, of course. But the girls have grown very fond of you.’ She stamped her feet; they were turning to blocks of ice, despite her boots. ‘Shall we walk back to the house? I don’t think there’s much more wood out here for the gathering,’ she said, picking up the basket. ‘This will have to do for kindling. But there are plenty of logs up at the house. And surely this cold weather must ease off soon, don’t you think?’
Nancy agreed with a happier smile, and they walked briskly back to the house, the dogs bounding around them, tails wagging.
She had spoken optimistically, trying to keep her cousin’s spirits up, but, in truth, Selina was not at all comfortable with the situation. She now had a young unmarried woman in the house who was expecting a child, and while she wasn’t particularly bothered that Nancy had behaved recklessly with this young man, she knew most of their neighbours would think otherwise. With the help of important local figures like the doctor and William MacGregor, she had worked hard to be accepted as part of this tight-knit community after her sister’s tragic death. But this unexpected pregnancy was likely to cause one hell of a stink.
The longer she could keep Nancy’s condition quiet, the better. But she would need to take William MacGregor into her confidence, at least. He managed the estate and had a right to know.
As soon as Selina had parked her car in a snowy side street in Bodmin town centre, Peter jumped out of the passenger seat, buttoned up his overcoat and said brusquely, ‘Thanks for the lift into town, Aunt Selly. I’ll meet you back here later.’
Selina stared at her nephew, bemused. ‘I thought you were coming to lunch with me and Mr MacGregor.’
‘Sorry, not hungry.’ Peter turned up the collar of his coat, looking up and down the street. ‘Will you be long?’
‘About an hour,’ she said reluctantly. The boy had been behaving awkwardly since coming home from school, and William had agreed to discuss his behaviour today, man to man, in the hope of settling him down, since it was clear he would never confide in his aunt. ‘The thing is, Peter, I was rather hoping you and Mr MacGregor might have a chat—’
‘Later, maybe.’ Peter trudged away, hands in his pockets, leaving Selina frustrated.
William was waiting for her at a corner table. He stood up at her approach, looking surprised. ‘Hello, where’s Peter?’ The solicitor pulled out a chair for her and she sat down, feeling flustered.
Briefly, she explained what had happened. ‘I don’t know what to do about him,’ she admitted with a sigh. ‘He’s not rude as such. I just feel we can’t talk anymore.’
‘I wouldn’t worry too much. Boys his age can be difficult.’ His eyes twinkled at her as he summoned the waiter. ‘I’ll walk back with you after lunch and have a word with him if you like.’
‘Thank you.’
The restaurant was draughty, and the menu limited, manyitems crossed off due to food shortages. But the off-ration food was as delicious as ever, and while they ate, they discussed how the household was coping with the constant blackouts and the possibility of installing a generator at the hall for emergency use.
Selina, tucking eagerly into her meal, could not help contrasting her life now with her days as a Land Girl in Porthcurno. Then, they had gulped down sausages in gravy or rabbit stew for their main meals, with bread and butter pudding afterwards or tinned fruit with a dash of condensed cream. Tasty enough after a long day’s work in the fields, but she couldn’t ever remember being presented with slivers of duck cooked with orange for her lunch. Some days she felt like pinching herself.
But while these posh lunches with William were marvellous, they also served to remind her that she didn’t truly belong in this world. It was only through caring for her late sister’s children that she was even living at Thornton Hall, and if the solicitor didn’t always insist on paying for these meals, she could not have afforded to walk through the door. Such thoughts kept her feet firmly on the ground …
Guiltily, Selina recalled her other reason for lunching with William today. ‘There’s something else I need to discuss with you,’ she began, patting her mouth with a napkin. ‘It’s rather delicate, I’m afraid.’
