“This is stupid,” I spoke to my reflection, running my hand through my hair. Letting out an exasperated breath, I flopped down onto my bed. Folding my arms under my head, I stared up at the ceiling as if it would tell me I was just fine.
I hated that I was nervous about going over to Quinn’s house. Sure, part of it was because I knew my dad wouldn’t approve of the fact that we were workingon a woodshop project, but the much larger and far scarier reason for my fear was because I didn’t want to face how I felt about him.
And to be honest, I wasn’t entirely sure about that last part either.
Part of me still harbored anger for him, which was ridiculous because the only interaction we’d had aside from the first day of school and yesterday at the homecoming game was five years ago.The embarrassment from that day was still alive and kicking and seeing him only breathed even more life into that feeling. Yet, despite hating him for standing up for me when I couldn’t stand up for myself, I didn’t hate him at all.
“Whatever,” I spat to myself. Standing in front of the mirror once more, I stared at my reflection again. “Just go. Stop thinking about that shit.”
A quick lookdown at my phone told me I needed to get going. “Mom,” I called out as I walked down the stairs. “Can I take the car?”
“Sure, just be back—”
“Too late,” Patrick said, running from behind me. He swiped the keys from the hook hanging by the front door. “Sucker,” he added, looking over his shoulder with pride brightening his eyes.
Mom shrugged and then rolled her eyes as Patrick walked out thedoor. Before I could walk away and cut my losses, Mom shockingly asked, “Where are you going?” She never asked that. “Who are you meeting up with?” She also never asked me about my friends. Mainly because I never had any. That thought was a knife through my already damaged heart.
I don’t know what inspired me to answer, maybe it was just the crazy thought that I could at least get one parentto like me. “I have a partnered project for shop. I’m heading over to Quinn’s, the kid I got paired with, so we can work on the plans.”
She smiled and said, “Sounds fun.” Then she went back to whatever she was doing before I came downstairs as if the exchange meant nothing to her at all.
And it probably didn’t, for her at least.
For me, I’d always remember it as the first time I felt like myown mother had the smallest spark of an interest in my life.
With whatever words of argument I had sitting on the tip of my tongue, I grabbed my hoodie and huffed out my frustrations. Those were only escalated when I overheard my dad say, “Always a day late and a dollar short.” He chuckled before returning his attention to the newspaper he was reading.
One day I’d be able to say something backto him. I’d be able to stand up for myself, make him eat his words rather than use them to put me down.
It was just that clearly, today was not that day.
I spent most of the time walking to Quinn’s house daydreaming about what I would do when this school year was over. My dad was still dead set on me going to the same college as my brother. Sure it would save them some money, but it’s not likeit was my fault they had twins.
Though he certainly made me feel like it had been my fault.
The ten minutes it took me to make it to Quinn’s was enough time for me to figure out a plan of getting a full scholarship to a school of my choice so there was no way Dad could say no. It was foolproof.
I laughed. It was also ridiculous to think about me getting a full ride anywhere.
After pullingmyself together, I knocked on the door and I was beyond thankful Quinn was the one waiting for me on the other side. I wasn’t in much of a mood for small talk with his parents or his sister.
My relief had nothing to do with his sandy blond hair or bright blue eyes. It had absolutely nothing to do with the wide happy smile with which he greeted me. And it most definitely had nothing to do withthe way his muscles stretched under his tight T-shirt or the way his jeans hugged his thighs.
Nope, nothing to do with those things at all.
“Hey,” he greeted me with excitement and enthusiasm in his voice. “Come on in.” He motioned his hand to his side, allowing me the space to walk past him. His clean scent, with a touch of something that smelled a lot like burned wood, made my insides twistwith an entirely new feeling.
“Mom, this is Ryan. He’s the guy I was telling you about.” There wassomethingin his voice as he introduced me. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but it sounded like he was happy to see me. Such a foreign concept for me.
So was me being happy to see him.
Pushing that thought way out of my head, I shook his mom’s hand and said hello. “It’s nice to meet you,” I addedpolitely.
“Likewise. I’ve heard all about you. I’m excited to see what you boys put together.” Quinn had her eyes. Sapphire almost. Mesmerizing. Soft. Compassionate.
I had no clue when I’d put together all these opinions about Quinn, but there they were, rolling around in my head like some kind of runaway freight train.
“Thank you for letting us work here, Mrs. Jacobs.”
