“Because I can.” He wiggles his eyebrows at me with a huge smile spreading across his beautiful face. He slings the towel over his shoulder and struts into the other room to make his phone call. Watching his fine ass swagger away from me distracts me from the pot of sauce that is currently boiling over in front of me.
As I’m cleaning up the mess, Reid comes back into the kitchen and slumps, rather defeated for someone who was just swatting my ass, into the chair. His head hangs down low in his hands and before I can say a word, I notice the tears dropping down on the tabletop.
I’m by his side quickly and when he feels me next to him, he just buries his head into my neck and starts sobbing.
“Baby, what is it? What happened?” I’ve never seen him like this, not even after his nightmare about Shane.
Through his deep heaving sobs, he manages to tell me that it’s his mom. “She had another heart attack. She’s stable and everything, but they…don’t think…she’s not going to make it through the week. Katie says it looks like she’ll be lucky to make it through the night.”
I wrap my arms around him as tight as I can and rub circles around his back. I try to hold them back, but the tears flow freely. I’m hurting because he hurts and I wish there was something I could do to take away his pain.
Running my fingers through his hair, and holding him close to me seems to help him calm a little. When he looks up at me, his eyes are pained and fearful; my heart breaks all over again.
Holding his hands in mine, I try to settle my nerves. “Reid, why don’t we go there now?” I keep my words as calm as I can. I don’t want him to feel like I’m pushing him, but he’s obviously upset. “I don’t want to force you, but well, I just…”
“Okay.” His easy acceptance of my offer catches me off guard. He rubs his thumb over my knuckles and leans forward to kiss me. “Thank you, Maddy. For being there for me, I mean. All of this shit with my mom was what drove us apart in the first place and…well…I’m just better at dealing with it all, about even talking about any of it when you’re here with me.”
I drop his hands and cup my palms to his cheeks. “Reid, you will never have to be anywhere without me.”
We’re out of the house in less than five minutes – the stove and oven are off, but other than that we leave as quickly as possible. We don’t have the luxury of time on our sides. Once we’re on the road, I call Mel and let her know what happened. I know she and Momma understand. I promise to keep them updated as soon as we know anything.
The car ride goes quickly and we’re pulling up to Reid’s mom’s house in what feels like no time. In reality though, it’s been a few hours and the sun is setting quietly in the horizon. It’s peaceful, quiet and serene. I would imagine that most families are gathered around the table enjoying their Christmas dinner, basking in the presence of their loved ones.
Glancing at Reid once more before we exit the Jeep, I wish I could offer him some words, some kind of encouragement. But there are none. No words exist to offer comfort to someone who is about to lose their mother. I know this much from my own life.
In a simple glance across the cabin of the car, we understand each other; we understand that there’s no need for words right now. The only thing that’s needed now is love and we’ve got that in spades.
Reaching out to knock on the door, my hand shakes. Maddy sees it and gently places her hand over mine to steady it. As we hear footsteps approach us, Maddy laces her fingers through mine. She squeezes my hand gently and looks up at me with such love and compassion – it’s overwhelming.
I kiss the top of her head. “Thank you for doing this with me. I couldn’t have done it alone.” My voice quivers and I hate this dreadful feeling that’s creeping into my chest.
Maddy leans into my side and says, “You’ll never have to be alone again.”
Whatever else she might have wanted to say is cut short as Katie opens the door before us. Her eyes are swollen and puffy. It’s fairly obvious that she’s been crying all day. Stepping through the door, a sad yet calm feeling washes over me.
Katie and Maddy exchange small smiles. Maddy extends her hand to Katie. “Hi. I’m Maddy. It’s nice to finally put a face to the name.” Her words are quiet and unsure. Everyone’s emotions are obviously on edge.
“It’s good to finally meet you too.” Katie steps to the side and ushers us into the living room. “Why don’t you guys have a seat while I go check with Dad.”
She stops at the threshold of the living room before reaching the stairs and turns around to come back to us. She sits in the recliner to the side of us and clears her throat before speaking. With her head hanging low, she averts eye contact. “I…I’m so sorry for all the pain I caused the two of you. I just thought…” I know where she’s going with this. Her apologies aren’t needed. For the first time since her phone number flashed across my screen, I’m glad that Katie called me.
I reach out and hold her hand and she looks up to meet my eyes. “Katie, it’s okay. We’re okay.” Nodding at Maddy, I add, “And I’m glad you called.” I smile – a small, lame smile – to reassure her that everything really is okay between us.
She returns the same defeated look and she excuses herself in search of her father. When Katie leaves the room, Maddy catches sight of the mantle that proudly displays the pictures of me and Shane. I follow behind her as she walks over to them.
She picks up the one of me and Shane in our little league uniforms from so many years ago and clutches her hand to her chest. Looking up over her shoulder at me, I see the tears shining in her eyes. “You guys look so cute together. You look like best friends.”
“We were. God, I miss him so much.” My head hangs low as I cradle it in my hands. Pulling Maddy back to me, I say “But seeing him here, in these pictures, it makes it hurt a little less. I’ve spent so long trying to block out everything, that I never realized I was blocking out the good stuff too.” I take the picture from her hand and get lost in reminiscing about how awesome my big brother was.
Our conversation is interrupted by an “ahem” from behind us. Turing around abruptly, I see Joe on the other side of the room. He looks tired – even more exhausted than when I saw him last. Guilt washes over me immediately just thinking about how I up and left him in the hospital to deal with the news of my mother’s worsening condition.
With Maddy in tow, I walk over to him but words elude me. Joe’s look of understanding is enough to make me realize that I don’t need to explain myself. He claps his arm around my shoulder and gives a tight one-armed squeeze. He holds out his hand to Maddy and she places hers in his. “You must be Maddy. Reid and Katie have had lots of great things to say about you.” He kisses her hand sweetly and adds, “It’s nice to finally meet you. I just wish it were under better circumstances.”
Maddy’s eyes glow with compassion and love. “I wish that too, Joe. Is there anything I can do to help?”
Katie chimes in and walks up next to Joe. Wrapping her arm around Joe’s waist, she says, “I was just about to throw something together for dinner. We haven’t really eaten all day.” Katie sounds lost and alone. She’s about to lose the woman she considers her mother and I can tell that Maddy understands her pain all too well. Looking up at me for some kind of permission, I kiss the top of Maddy’s head and say, “Go ahead. I think we could all use a bite to eat.” I offer up a weak smile.
Maddy and Katie go to the kitchen and Joe walks to the stairs. I know he expects me to follow him, but I’m frozen to the spot. Gaining some sense of composure, I walk numbly over to him. As we ascend the stairs, he fills me in on the details that at this point, aren’t really all that necessary. Mom had another heart attack yesterday. Her system is weakened as it is and the hospice nurse, who was here earlier in day, said she didn’t expect Mom to make it through to the end of the week.
