My phone vibrates in my pocket pulling my attention away from our conversation.
With a swipe of the finger, I answer the call. “Hey, Reid. Hold on. Let me get upstairs.”
I get up from the couch and turn around to Mel. “I’m going to take this upstairs.” I wave over my shoulder as I walk away from her and she rolls her eyes at me and my need to talk to my boyfriend in private.
I close the door behind me and flop on my bed. “Hey, baby. How was your day?”
“Much better now that I’m talking to you.” His voice makes my stomach do this crazy flip-flop thing. Even talking to him on the phone makes me all giddy and excited.
“So, I have some good news for you.” I dangle the words out there to bait him in.
“Oh, yeah. And what would that be?” God, the gruffness of his words is so freaking sexy.
“I got my cast off yesterday. So, do you know what that means?” I pause and let him think for a quick second, but before he can say anything, I try to make my words as sexy and flirty as possible. “That means that you can finally tie me up like you promised.”
The line goes silent.
A few moments later, I ask, “You still there, babe?” I know he’s still there; I can hear him breathing heavily.
He clears his throat. “Um, yeah. I’m here.” I hear him shift on whatever it is that he’s sitting on. “God, I can’t wait until tomorrow.”
A soft chuckle comes out as I say, “Yeah, you miss me or something?”
“Let’s just say that my hand and I are getting a little reacquainted, and just thinking about tying you to a bed is not helping my situation.” I hear him sigh.
“What’s wrong, I mean other than missing me of course?” There’s a playful tone to my words, but when I hear him take a deep breath before speaking, I get the distinct feeling that something is wrong.
“I spoke to my internship coordinator and they weren’t able to get me something in Elmira.” He sounds pissed.
My stomach drops at the thought that we’ll have to be separated for longer than this week. I know it sounds childish – lots of people spend much longer than just a few months away from one another.
“So what does that mean?” I wish my voice wasn’t shaking. I want to support him in whatever he chooses, but I can’t help but feel disappointed in this recent development.
“Move here with me, Maddy. Please.” His calm command catches me off guard.
“You know I can’t Reid. I just got the job and Momma’s here and I already withdrew from classes.” We can both hear the anxiety rising in my voice.
“You already withdrew?” He’s surprised. I guess I never told him that.
“Yes. Just the other day. When you told me you were going to move your internship, I filled out the paperwork right away. I’m pregnant, Reid, remember? I don’t belong on a college campus.” I’m so flustered I can’t even figure out how to explain it all to him.
“Unfucking believable. I said I wouldtryto move it. I never said it was a guarantee.” Disgust and anger are starting to permeate his words. His tone changes and we start arguing over the whole thing. Quickly, we resort to ugly habits – raised voices, name calling. When some of the anger recedes and we both realize that we’re not going to get anywhere while we’re yelling at each other, I hear him take a deep breath.
Sighing into the phone, he says, “But you belong here, with me. Move here, please.” He’s begging, pleading with me, but I just can’t give in that easily.
“Baby, please. I want to live with you, please just give me some time to think things out. I can’t just up and leave everything that I’ve started here either.” I pause and try to rack my brain for possible options. “If you can’t move the internship and I can’t leave my job and my new school, what choices do we have left?” Maybe he can think of something that I’m not seeing.
He puffs out a deep breath. “Well, it means that I have two choices. Stay here until the end of May when the internship ends. Or, leave it and move to Elmira with you and find something entirely different.”
I know this internship is a huge opportunity for him and the fact that he is even considering giving it up to move closer to me speaks volumes for his love. But if he stays there, he’ll miss out on pretty much the entire pregnancy. I’m so torn about what to say to him. I know the consequences of forcing his decision one way or the other, so, rather than say anything to try and sway his choice, I just ask, as sweetly and calmly as I can in a vain attempt to hide my anxiety, “What are you going to do?”
“I’m not sure, yet. Please believe me, Maddy. I want to be there with you. I really do, but it’s just that I have worked so hard to get this position and it means so much to me both personally and professionally. I don’t want to just up and abandon it without really giving some hard thought.” He sighs again and there’s a twinge of pain in my chest at feeling like we are going to be separated. “I really thought they would be able to place me somewhere else. I’m so sorry, Maddy.”
Neither one of us says anything right away. I sit in silence at the thought of our current situation. Scoffing at my initial reaction, I gather my thoughts and begin speaking. “It’s okay, Reid. Really, it’s fine. And no, I don’t mean ‘fine’ in that girl code that means ‘fine-but-only-if-you-ultimately-choose-what-I-want-you-to-choose’ way.”
That gets him to laugh a little.
“I mean fine in that I totally understand and you’re right. You have worked your incredibly fine ass off for this job and for this career. It’s only a two hour drive, so we can still spend the weekends together.” Now that I’ve rationalized it aloud, I even see the simplicity of it. Yeah, the weeks will be a bit boring and lonely, but I’ve made friends at work. I could finally put those mad crocheting skills that Aunt Maggie taught me to use.
