Slowed by their lack of provisions, Robert had decided to stock this place and use it during the next months to shore up his hold over these lands controlled, for now, by allies of the powerful Comyns. Not many were privy to his plans, but Robert had shared them with Sebastien, and intended to announce them to his noble supporters at the gathering in Kilcrenan.
Sebastien could only imagine the resistance that would explode there at the news that he, an illegitimate soldier from largely unknown origins, would receive the wardenship of the captured MacDougall lands and titles permanently. Sebastien of Cleish would stand as guardian to the MacDougall’s heir and control this crucial part of the coastline of western Scotland in reward for his service to the Bruce and his promise of allegiance for the future.
Robert had revealed that once the war was done, Sebastien was to receive a large grant of land here that he could pass on to any sons of his own. And, so long as Malcolm would swear allegiance and be counseled by Sebastien, the boy would regain Dunstaffnage once he was old enough to control the men who served the MacDougalls.
Of course, Sebastien knew that through all of this, Lara would be an overwhelming influence on the boy and on the path to peace in this area. Malcolm had revealed some of Lara’s warnings against betraying his clan. Sebastien would need to gain her support and trust in order to gain the boy’s.
For someone who had never truly dreamed of home and hearth, he was surprised how those dreams now invaded his thoughts and, nightly, invaded his sleep. This invitation to sit and sup with him sprang forth from the odd longings he’d developed since marrying the Maid of Lorne and learning of the king’s plans.
Not that she gave Sebastien any encouragement. She fought him with words or with silence at every step. She exerted pressure on her brother to make him resistant to any argument for a true truce, or to any offers to continue his training. She refused to share a meal with Sebastien.
Foolish thoughts again! Here he stood, one of the Bruce’s most able commanders of men, twisted in complete confusion over a mere woman. He turned his face into the rain, allowing its chill to infuse him once more. He’d been so rattled by her accusations that he’d left without his helmet, his sword, or his damn cloak, which would have protected his armor from this onslaught of rain.
Even more frustrating, he found himself standing on the shore of the firth, staring up at the north tower where she was. Not sure of how much time had passed, he wiped his face and decided to go back to his duties. Since he would be leaving in another two days, there was much to see to, and wasting his time like this was not his usual behavior. Shrugging off this nonsensical worrying over Lara and her part in his future, indeed in Scotland’s future, he turned and nearly walked into Hugh.
“A good fight would rid you of this restlessness,” his friend said. “Or is it a good lay you need?” he asked with a raised eyebrow and a wary expression in his dark eyes.
“Either? Both? Neither?” he answered flatly.
“If ’tis a good fight you want, I can provide that to you,” Hugh replied, smacking him on the back. “It’s been nigh to a month since I faced a real challenge on the field.”
“A month? Have you forgotten Brander Pass?”
“Nay, Sebastien, I have not. But fighting MacDougalls is not really a challenge…not when they run from you.”
Sebastien shook his head over Hugh’s attempt at an insulting jest.
“Speaking of running away, the lady followed you from her tower.” Hugh crossed his arms over his chest. “But you were running from the hall so fast that you did not hear her call.”
“Did she tell you why?” He tried to dampen the interest in his voice, but it was obvious even to his own ears.
“Nay, but she did not delay in reminding me of my proper place.” His friend laughed now as though remembering what had occurred. “She has spirit, that one. But, in spite of her clear intent, I did not accept her challenge and tell her that the two places I belong are in battle or between the warm and welcoming thighs of a fair wench.” Hugh laughed louder this time, and Sebastien chuckled because he knew that his friend usually would not hesitate to enter a battle of words.
Sebastien sobered then, daring to ask the one person he trusted with his life the question that had been tormenting him for the last hours and days. “Do you ever wish for more than this soldier’s life? Do you ever crave living in one place with one woman?”
“Is that what has you in such a state?” Hugh stepped back and looked him over from head to toe as though he did not know him. “Sebastien, for mercenaries such as us, there is only the battle. I cannot see myself in one place even when the Bruce controls the whole of Scotland. And I cannot think that you would be happy in such a life.”
He shrugged, trying to consider his friend’s words. Hugh did not yet know of the Bruce’s decision, which gave Sebastien an option he’d never had before. The fact that he’d been ordered to marry or kill Lara was the first step, and Sebastien was certain that Robert had never meant for him to kill her. The Bruce was excellent at making people believe they had a choice, when none truly existed.
Robert wanted Sebastien in place and in control when he presented his counselors with his plans. It would be much more difficult for those within Robert’s forces who opposed him to stop him once he actually held Dunstaffnage, the Maid of Lorne and the heir to the clan.
But now what?
The castle, he could hold.
The heir, he could protect and train.
The woman? Wed and consummated. Their marriage was a fact, but Lara refused to accept it. Could he change her mind and exert the same control over her that he did over his other responsibilities? He shook his head.
Hugh misunderstood the gesture. “So, you see the wisdom of my words. Though this marriage accomplishes some feat for the Bruce, he will no doubt assist you in nullifying it when his enemies are no more. Dunstaffnage is simply a stop along our path as soldiers, and she is simply a diversion for you while we are here. Accept her as such and do not allow her this power over you.”
Sebastien’s thoughts warred in his mind. Part of him, the part that had lived the same life as Hugh for years, accepted the truth in his friend’s words. Unfortunately, that other part, the part that knew much more about the Bruce and about his plans and about the truth of Sebastien’s background, did not wish to acknowledge it for the harsh description of his life that it was.
His delay in arguing his friend’s assumption made Hugh believe he agreed. “Come then. Let us find that worthless lad you call squire and give him your mail and armor so that he can clean off the results of this rain.”
Sebastien nodded and walked with Hugh back toward the drawbridge. Philippe could indeed clean his mail and armor and begin teaching Malcolm to, as well. Sebastien’s skin itched for him to remove it, but he hesitated while outside the keep.
“Then I will fight you man-to-man and truly give you something to worry about,” Hugh added the challenge very casually.
