It would not be surprising that his son had fathered a child on her for many MacLerie men had natural children. His own father produced several, including his half-sister Margaret. So it was not unusual at all. But her not wanting Aidan to know spoke of a woman who was cutting ties completely.
He would abide by their agreement, even if he pondered on it. It made things easier for him and he tried never to look for trouble.
He pulled open the door and he watched as the one person who did always seem to seek out trouble walked towards him. She would never understand the wisdom in what he’d done, so he had no plans to speak of it to her.
‘I went to see my son’s leman, after hearing about the fight, and she is gone.’ She crossed her arms over her chest, tossing her auburn hair over her shoulder and taking what he called her ‘fight’ position. ‘What have you done with her, Connor?’
He tried to look aggrieved, and part of him was that, at always being blamed for the things that happened that she did not like. He was laird. He was chieftain. He was earl. And with those titles and positions came great responsibility and the need to make decisions even when they were unpleasant, ruthless, expedient or wise. He could not reveal the truth about Catriona, for this time he’d only assisted someone who’d already made their decision.
‘Jocelyn,’ he drawled out, ‘I did nothing to the woman. She is well, as I told Aidan. She is gone. She is no longer our concern.’ She studied him in silence, so he held out his arm to her. ‘Come with me so we can watch for the guests who arrive shortly. What did Lilidh write to you about the MacKenzie girl?’
From her intelligent gaze, he knew he had not convinced her to desist in her concern for Catriona nor deflected whatever actions she would take. He only hoped that by the end of this visit, a betrothal would be in sight and her attentions must turn to that.
He could only hope.
* * *
Neither of the young women there to meet him reminded him of Cat and Aidan supposed that was a good thing. Their looks and manners never mimicked anything about her. But their presence did not ease the pain in his heart over her departure or over his betrayal of her trust.
Days filled with pleasantries and journeys and meals and polite conversations were followed by nights of dreams that brought back every moment of passion...and love that they had shared. And then, just before he would wake, he would see her lovely face washed of all colour and her eyes fill with condemnation as she looked at him in that moment when his part in her seduction and downfall became clear to her.
He would wake up sweating and pleading with her to hear him. To an empty bed in an empty chamber that had once been filled with love.
Aidan used these days while forced to attend to Lady Alys MacKenzie and Lady Elizabeth Maxwell to send out men to search MacLerie villages and lands for her. He used what coins he could to pay for it and sent only men who could be discreet. And he tried to arrange it all without his father knowing of it.
The busy days passed. The endless, empty nights passed. Soon, the Maxwells and the MacKenzies left and Aidan’s life returned to what it been before he saw Cat by the well that day months before.
He trained with his friends, except for Munro who had moved to another of the MacLerie’s holdings. He drank with them. He still could not bring himself to go carousing with them and seek out women as he had before...before Catriona. No matter that he understood why she would refuse his love, it did not stop him from loving her.
He continued to try to find her. His father’s assessing gaze sat on him many times and he fought the urge to confess it to him. A time of reckoning was coming for them and Aidan did not think it would end well for either of them.
* * *
Two horrible, miserable, lonely months passed and Aidan knew what he must do. His efforts to find her were unsuccessful. So, he finally accepted that there was only one thing to do—tell his father he was going to find her and marry her, in spite of his opposition.
He waited to speak to his parents after the evening meal, telling them he’d made his decision about which woman he would marry. Although his father nodded at him and his mother had the gleam of tears in her eyes, the tension built through the meal and followed them into his mother’s solar. Once the door closed, the first of his two battles began.
‘So,’ his father began once his mother was seated and he stood next to her chair, ‘who is it to be then?’
‘None of them.’
‘None of them? What do you mean?’ his father growled.
‘I will marry none of them.’
‘Oh, you wish for us to seek other women for you to consider?’ his mother asked. ‘I thought that Elizabeth suited you well. In spite of her being from England, she seemed at ease here.’
‘I have decided on my bride, Mother,’ he said.
‘Aidan...’ His father shook his head, warning him off.
But Aidan had made too many mistakes with Catriona not to learn from them. He would find her. He would make her understand how much he regretted his terrible actions and the consequences of them. He would make her understand that the love they’d found was worth saving. He was worth saving and she was the one person who could.
‘I do not know where you have hidden her, but I will find her,’ he promised. ‘I leave on the morrow to begin my search.’
‘You have duties here, Aidan. I forbid you to leave on this foolhardy quest to find a woman unworthy of my heir.’
He faced his father now and shook his head.
