As he’d said, no one would dare to insult her while she was under his protection. The news of that protection raced through the village even as she stood in that house and tried to decide her answer and her fate. The MacLerie kith and kin took the choice out of her hands and made it a thing already done.
If he was true to his words, nothing of what they believed mattered to what, if anything, happened between them. The power to say aye or nay remained with her. Muireall’s words of advice, spoken early this morn when Cat returned to her cottage, echoed in her thoughts all day as she made her way back to the house.
In spite of sharing the beds of many women since gaining manhood, he has never made these kind of arrangements with any woman. No matter how this began, you are a widow now with no family. More importantly, for the first time in your life, this is your choice. Accept the house, accept him in your bed, or do not. It is up to you.
So, if Cat could believe it, this was not something he did often. He was offering her not just protection, but property of her own. He offered her a future better than she ever expected, which was more honourable than she had expected.
Muireall was a practical woman and she understood the MacLeries better than Cat ever could. And though married twice, Cat had never felt part of either clan or place. If everyone believed she was Aidan’s mistress, she would have a chance to meet more people and gain friends. Then when it was over, for it would have to end, she would have a house and have more friends.
Most of all—do what you wish to do. You deserve some happiness and if you will get it from being with him, then be with him. No one can plan what will happen on the morrow, so seize what happiness you can now.
That had been her advice all along. Muireall knew Cat’s deepest sorrow—to never bear children—and urged her to seek whatever would give her the happiness she needed instead.
So, the only decision she made that day was to take each day as it came. If Aidan wanted her, if he pursued her as he’d promised to do, she would do only what felt right to her. Accepting the house did not, so she would accept only the hospitality of it for now. Living there, living on her own, finding her own place among the people here, would give her a chance to set down some roots here.
Walking through the shady path that led to her...the house, Cat could not figure out why she was the target of his efforts. Her experiences in the marriage bed had been unappealing at best and painful and unwanted at worst. Though Gowan always had a care for her during those early, infrequent times in their marriage when he’d shared her bed, her first husband had not.
She shuddered then, forcing away the memories and images she swore would remain in the past.
Men certainly seemed to gain pleasure from joinings of the flesh, but she’d never experienced what so many women whispered about at the well or while gathered together to share chores. And she knew many happily married couples whose morning glances spoke of such pleasure. Cat wondered if the damage caused by losing her bairn prevented her from feeling such things?
Lifting the latch, she carried her purchases into the house. Across the room, she saw the spot where she’d stood during that kiss. Heat coursed through her now, telling her that pleasure might not be an impossible thing between Aidan MacLerie and the woman he wanted in his bed.
But could she allow it? Could she be happy as a wealthy man’s leman?
* * *
This time, it was different.
Aidan walked up the path and noticed light from within. Smoke escaped up the main chimney as did the smell of something wonderful. His stomach growled in anticipation, even though he’d shared the evening meal with his family and even though he did not expect Catriona to cook for him.
She was not his servant. Nor would she become one.
Opening the door, he found her in the same chair where she’d sat last night. He nodded and closed the door behind him.
‘Good evening, Catriona,’ he said, hanging the skin of wine on a hook near the cooking area.
‘And to you, my l-l-l—’ she began and then stuttered.
‘Will you now call me Aidan?’ He laughed. ‘If nothing else, no one will hear it but me.’
‘Good evening, Aidan,’ she said softly. It was only one of the ways he wanted to hear his name coming from that mouth, but he would take it...for now. ‘Have you eaten yet?’
‘I have,’ he said, noticing the table set with two bowls and spoons. ‘But the smell of it is making me hungry again.’ He approached the table. ‘You did not wait your meal on my arrival, did you?’
She did not answer, she only put down the clothing she was mending and rose, going over to put some of the aromatic stew into the bowls. As he sat in one of the chairs, he noticed that her portion was smaller than his and his was not the same amount that he’d eaten the first time she cooked for him.
‘Are you not hungry? Especially since you waited?’ he asked. Realising he’d brought the wine for her, he retrieved it and poured it into their cups.
‘My l—’ she began to say and he frowned at her. ‘Aidan, I am not accustomed to such rich wines.’
‘Become accustomed,’ he growled. He wanted her to savour the finer things he could give her now. He softened his tone. ‘Surely you would not refuse a taste to honour the first meal in your new house?’ Instead of arguing, she lifted her cup up and nodded. ‘To many happy hours in your new house,’ he said, touching his cup to hers.
‘To your new house.’
He laughed when she changed the words, but his laughter died as he watched her lift the cup to her mouth and drink from it. Her chin lifted, exposing her graceful throat to him. When the wine rushed too quickly past her lips and threatened to spill, she licked them quickly with the tip of her tongue.
Aidan stood and was leaning halfway across the table, wanting to taste the wine on her lips, when he remembered his vow to her. With a grunt, he sat back down and drank deeply from his own cup, hoping the strong wine could ease the powerful desire that coursed through his veins now. And he cursed his foolishness at giving such a vow when all he wanted to do was kiss her!
