“True, but I needed to prove a point.”
“Which was?”
“That Icouldhave manipulated Piper’s emotions in my favor if I wanted to. I could take away her disdain for me in an instant if I chose to.”
“But you don’t want to?”
“No, Auraelia. I do not want to control a woman’s feelings for me. I don’t want to controlanyone’sfeelings; it's not right. Who am I to say how someone should feel?” Aiden ran a hand through his golden locks, mussing up the perfect coif he always wore. “As an empath, I feeleverything. From joy to sorrow and everything in between. It’s draining. After a while, I struggled to differentiate my emotions and feelings from those around me. So, I just…stopped.”
“So, what? You just shoved your feelings down, locked them in a tight little box so you wouldn’t have to deal with them?”
“Basically.”
“So, what happened with Piper?”
“Piper was supposed to be a one-night thing.” A small smile lifted the corners of his lips. “I was drawn to the fire in her eyes and that smart mouth of hers—much like the way Daemon was drawn to you, I’d imagine—and she was fun.”
“So what changed?”
His smile faltered, and he sucked on a canine. “I could feel her feelings shifting, and I’m not that guy. I’m the fun guy, the ‘let’s meet up and fuck’ guy, not the ‘let’s settle down and make babies’ guy. And then, when you came to Kalmeera, I could feel Xander’s feelings for her. So I backed off. She deserves someone like him. Someone who will put her first. She deserves a man who will settle down. And that’s never going to be me.”
“You like her.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Aiden—”
“Rae, please. Just…let it go, okay? I’m fine with how my life is.”
“No, you’ve accepted how you’vechosento live your life.”
Aiden scoffed, a soft smile returning to his face. “You’re one to talk.”
“Hey! I’m learning—growing. And if I can do it, so can you.”
“Whatever you say,Your Majesty.”
“Come on, we’re almost there.” Auraelia chuckled, pressing her heels into Jasira’s sides, urging her into a trot.
When the muddy field came into view, they slowed to a walk, the horses picking their way through the muck.
“Aiden?” Auraelia asked with slight hesitation.
“Yeah?”
“Thanks for telling me.”
He met her smile with one of his own and inclined his head toward her. “Thank you for asking.”
The smell of food cooking over open flames and the sound of laughter mixing with the squelch of boots in mud made for an interesting backdrop to the meeting she was attempting to have with Ser Aeron and Captain Soren—his first in command.
They stood around a small table, a map of Ixora laid across the top and draping over the sides. Tiny figurines that indicated the number of men they had and the known number that supported Davina were set into tight formation lines on top.
“How are the men doing? How’s morale?” she asked, her gaze trained on Captain Soren.
She’d only met the man a handful of times since he rarely came to court, choosing instead to stay with his men in thebarracks. Despite that, she trusted him—if only because Ser Aeron did.
“Morale is good, Your Majesty. The men are in good spirits despite the new circumstances.”
