"You're happy," he said.
"I'm terrified," Tula admitted. "But I'm also happy and excited and, frankly, overwhelmed." She traced the outline of the baby's head on the photo with her finger. "I never thought I'd have this. For thousands of years, I did my best not to get pregnant because I knew the consequences of having a baby in the harem. I resigned myself to never having this."
"But you wanted children." He could hear it in her voice, see it in the way she cradled the ultrasound image.
Tula shook her head. "It wasn't an option, so I didn't allow myself to dwell on it." She sighed. "When I was a girl, before my world disintegrated in one devastating act of evil, I dreamt of having a large family with a lot of children. My mother was an immortal, so her fertility was what it was. Wonder and I were lucky to be born only six years apart. I was envious of large human families."
Esag imagined Tula with a bunch of children running around and found the image amusing. She would have been a loving mother, but she would have also yelled at her children when they misbehaved. It would have been a chaotic household.
But that was a fantasy. Even if her world hadn't been destroyed, she would have been lucky to have one or two children. She was already an immortal when she accompanied Areana on her journey north, having been induced on her twelfth birthday. Having many children had never been in her future.
Alena was the one exception to the rule, having birthed fourteen children, but there was only one of her, and she was a miracle.
"This baby is lucky to have you as a mother," he said.
Tula turned to look at him, and the vulnerability in her expression made his protective instincts flare. He wanted, needed, to shield her from the sorrows and tribulations of the world. "Do you really think so? I'm so afraid I'll be terrible at it. I have a temper, and I'm not patient. Those are not good traits for a mother."
He took her hand and brought it to his lips for a kiss. "Love smooths over the rough edges, and no parent is perfect. We all do the best we can with what we have."
She smiled. "How would you know? You've never been a father."
"I raised Roven and Davuh even though I got them as adults. Hell, I'm still raising them. Do you think this living room would have been tidy today if I didn't yell at them this morning to clean it up?"
She laughed, which had been his intention. "Five-thousand-year-old babies. That's funny."
He affected a scowl. "Not really. I'm not supposed to be their keeper. They should know to clean up after themselves."
Tula looked at him with a peculiar expression on her beautiful face. "You'll make a good father." She smiled. "When Junior misbehaves, I'll waggle my finger at him and yell, 'Just wait until your father gets home.'"
They both sobered when the impossibility of her words registered.
He put his other hand over their intertwined fingers. "I would love for that scenario to play out in real life, but even if I'm lucky enough to share yours, this child will not call me father."
She nodded. "I know. I was just trying to be funny, and it came out all wrong. Don't make too much out of it."
How could he not?
She'd imagined that scenario because, on some level, she wished it were true, and so did he. Time would tell what would come of their relationship, but if they ever shared a household, Tony would have to be a frequent guest and a partner in raising his and Tula's child.
"Wonder thinks I should move in with her and Anandur," Tula said. "She's worried about me being alone in that house once the baby comes."
"That's not a terrible idea, but it's not great either. You have plenty of time to decide what you want to do."
Tula nodded. "Everything is so new, so different here." She turned to look at him, and there was hope and longing in her eyes. "I want someone who chooses to be there for me," she said softly. "Not out of obligation or duty, but because they want to be part of this. Part of my life and my child's life."
Esag's heart pounded so hard he was sure she could hear it. This was an invitation if he ever heard one.
"I want to be there," he said, and watched her eyes widen. "I know we barely know each other, and I know that this is moving faster than it probably should, but you are here for a reason. You came to me with pictures of your baby because you want me to be part of your life. Part of your child's life as well. Not as a father because I can't claim that honor, but as a favorite uncle, perhaps?"
"Tony will be around a lot. Are you sure you are up to that?"
"I can handle Tony."
"And Wonder—" Tula's voice broke. "Wonder might have feelings about this. About us. About you being with me. She has a truelove mate, so maybe she won't mind, but it's still complicated."
"I think she will be okay with us having a relationship, but I don't think we should officially move in together yet."
She frowned. "Why not?"
