“Was it safe?”
“Yeah, but I really should’ve caught on to the fact he’s probably a little weird.”
He chuckles and leans his hip against the counter. “Now, in this economy, sometimes people have to move back in with their parents.”
“He never moved out. And he’s almost forty. Oh, did I mention he’s a gamer? Trying to be a professional that records his games and uploads them to the internet. Didn’t know that was a thing until tonight.”
“Oh, there you go. Yep, I see it now.”
I laugh and take a tentative sip of the coffee, hoping I don’t burn my tongue. It’s good. It’sreallygood. “You don’t even have a taste of how bad this date went.”
He walks around the counter and leads me to a table. “Don’t keep me in suspense. What happened?”
“So, we’re playing his favorite online game,” I say, taking a seat across from Ken, “and it’s not terrible. He creates this avatar for me, and he shows me how to play. I kind of get the appeal once I figured it out.”
“Are you going to become a gamer now?”
Snorting, I hold up a finger. “Wait for it. Things are fine, but he smells… off. His cologne is strong enough to cover most of it, but there’s something underlying. Not worse than cow poop, but still.”
“Naturally.”
“In the game, this blue-skinned hooker-looking character with boobs bigger than her head starts flirting with Otto’s avatar—that’s my date’s name, by the way. And even though my avatar isright there, he acts like he’s not on a date.”
His eyes narrow. “He was flirting online with a bimbo avatar?”
“Yes. And I’m offended, which is stupid, but it’s basically like going to dinner with someone and watching them flirt with another person right in front of you.”
“Did you say something?”
“He wasn’t paying attention to me at all. I could’ve stripped naked next to him, and his eyes wouldn’t have left that screen.”
“You the human, or you the avatar?”
“Both!”
Ken laughs, which makes me a little less annoyed. “So? What’d you do?”
“I left when they started making out.”
“As you should have.”
“And I wish that was the end of it,” I say, taking another drink of the coffee.
It tastes like a Girl Scout cookie. I have no idea how he did that, but it’s kind of amazing.
“How was that not the end? Did he call you or something?”
I look into his gray eyes. “His mother said goodbye to me, and that she was happy her son was talking to a live person in front of him rather than through a screen. She wanted to give me her number, and I realized my phone fell out of my pocket downstairs. When I went back…”
His fingers tap on the table, his eyes wide as he stares at me. “What?”
“The avatars were having sex on the screen—and I finally figured out what the smell under the cologne was.”
Eyebrows lifted, his gaze intensifies. “Which was?”
“Lube.”
He just blinks. “Wh-what?”
