“They haven’t seen me.”
“What are you going to say?”
Before Ryan responded, the front door opened and footsteps clipped down the hall.
“Hey, Dev,” Mom said, still out of sight.
“Hey, Mom,” Devon responded, smiling.
Unsure how he’d explain the state of his face, Ryan tensed. If he’d known she wasn’t at work, he would’ve stayed in his room.
“Later,” Dev, that motherfucker said, chickening out and leaving Ryan alone to explain shit to Mom.
“Ryan, I need to talk to you…” Her voice trailed off as she walked into the room and saw Ryan. “What happened to you?”
Floundering for an explanation, he pursed his lips, unsure what the fuck to say. He definitely couldn’t explain all that he was responsible for. What he’d done to Molly was a tragedy. His role in Harley’s misery was a travesty. He even felt a little responsible for Rule’s breakdown and Mattie’s attack. The only reason CJ hadn’t broken his jaw was because he couldn’t prove his suspicions that Ryan gave up Molly’s location.
“Answer me, son.”
Just months ago, he would’ve responded just to get her off his back. He thought she didn’t love him so he’d pretended not to love her. He’d felt ignored, neglected, and overlooked. Right or wrong, he’d justified his actions and his hatred. He never would’ve thought he’d ever fear losing his mother.Trulylosing her, instead of in the way that he’d created in his head because of jealousy.
It was just easier to be a fucking asshole. When she discovered the truth, he’d lose her anyway. Wanting to cry, he stiffened instead, pretending he wasn’t falling apart inside “CJ happened to me,” he snapped, refusing to look at her.
“What did you do?”
That questiondidtrigger him. He’d always been the villain in every interaction with his brother and cousins. It didn’t matter if he usually instigated shit. He didn’t have to be the fucking go-to bully, while CJ was the fucking angel.
He heaved in breaths, panting, angry and hurt. He still wouldn’t look at his mother. She was smart. Something in his expression might give him away. She wouldn’t stop loving him if he was an asshole. But what he’d done went well beyond assholery.
“Why did you take those pictures of Harley?”
He should’ve known she knew. Nothing remained a secret in the club for very long.
“Answer me!” she ordered.
He wanted to confess and tell her the truth. He wanted to ask Pops to help him to remove the cameras in Rebel and Mattie’s rooms, ask what to do about Harley’s online bullying. But he’d violated their privacy, crossed so many lines, and stripped away their dignity. Harley’s situation with Nardo was almost over. Molly’s was, too. Rule was getting help. But the other two?
His burden heavy, his guilt eating him alive, he glared at Mom, unable to believe his mother was such a fighter when she was so pretty and delicate with thick chestnut hair, a slender, fit build, and creamy skin. He’d never really paid attention to her looks, until he started listening to how proud Rory and CJ were of their mothers. And until Mom pleaded for Ryan’s life and then fought Eliza Bart because she’d hurt him.
Mom’s strength and warrior spirit amazed him. Even though she was 5’6 or 5’7, he was taller than her. That didn’t matter. Her presence was huge.
“I’m counting to fucking three so you’ll have a chance to explain yourself, Ryan,” she spat. “Answer me or I’m knocking your fucking teeth out.”
Not knowing what else to do, he smirked at her and flipped her off.
Her whiskey-colored eyes narrowed. “You fucking asshole,” she said, charging him and swinging, clipping his jaw.
Ryan jumped to his feet and she kicked his fucking leg, bringing him to his knees.
“How could you violate her like that?” she yelled, walloping his jaw again.
“I didn’t violate Harley,” he barked, dodging another punch.
“You won’t tell me what the fuck happened. You must have.”
“I was trying to help her!” It wasn’t a lie. It just wasn’t the full truth. He was trying to save her from Nardo. He had yet to figure out how to save her from Willard without getting himself killed. “Mortician doesn’t like me, so I went to CJ.”
Mom socked Ryan in the fucking mouth. “That’sUncleMortician to you and don’t fucking forget that.”
