Breathe.I follow my own advice, knowing that I feel on edge. It’s something I was a little worried about. Dad mentioned itwasn’t sustainable for me to be on all these blockers for long periods of time, but they’ve been my safety blanket.
“I know,” Dr. Jones says with a nod. “You’re absolutely correct. The issue is that they can cause permanent damage over time at the levels you have in your system.”
“Really?” I ask, forcing myself to take another breath. “There’s a reason I take scent blockers. I’m a menace.”
“Why do you say that?” Barb asks, confused.
“When I was eighteen, I made a team play like shit and lose,” I sniff, blinking hard. “I can’t work here if I’m going to mess with the way the Dragons play.”
“I believe you believe that,” Dr. Jones says gently. “You aren’t responsible for the way grown men lose their minds. If you were in heat and came to work, then I’d be inclined to change my mind.”
“I’ve never had a heat,” I say, wincing. “I went on heat blockers pretty immediately after presenting. I use descenting sprays as well.”
“I think you can continue to use the descenting sprays, but my professional advice would be to go off all of your medications,” he says. “I’d recommend weaning off them so you won’t suffer any ill effects though.”
“That scares the hell out of me,” I sigh.
“It’s against company policy that we accept anyone as a new hire who goes against medical advice,” Barb explains. “Dr. Jones is concerned about the levels of these medications in your blood stream.”
“When is the last time you’ve had a blood draw?” the doctor asks.
Bringing my cool fingers to my temples, I begin to rub them.
“I haven’t. I mean, I was never told by the doctor that I’d need any,” I say. “What are the possible side effects of this?”
“Really high anxiety, jumpiness, nausea, low appetite…” Dr. Jones continues to list things, and I realize that I have at least half of those side effects.
“I just thought my anxiety was normally this high,” I explain. “It’s something I’ve had for years. I was actually thinking about anti-anxiety meds.”
“It’s possible you’d have some anxiety naturally, but the medications I’m seeing in your tests indicate that these are exacerbating the symptoms,” he says.
Shit on a peppermint stick.
“I guess I’m going off my meds,” I whisper, feeling lightheaded.
What the fuck, am I going to go into heat next?
“How long will my medication stay in my system?” I ask. “I’m kind of envisioning going into heat without any warning.”
“They won’t immediately cycle out,” Dr. Jones reassures me. “You should look at figuring out a plan soon for it. There are clinics in New Orleans that could help?”
“Heat clinics?” I ask, blinking hard. “I have trust issues. I don’t know if I could handle something like that.”
“There are also dating groups in this city where you could reach an understanding, sex toys, etc,” Barb adds, ignoring the heat in my cheeks.
“Okay,” I say, hoping to end this conversation.
Sex is normal, I know that, I joke with my best friend about it. That’s more like hypothetical sex. It’s hard to wrap my mind around having consensual sex with anyone. I’m not sure that’ll ever be in the cards for me. I’ll have to figure something out.
I should probably start with making a nest in my room. Have I mentioned how terrible an omega I am?
“Now, if we’ve quite convinced you…” Barb drawls, waiting for me to nod. “Then you’re hired! Welcome to the team. You can start as soon as tomorrow actually.”
“Thank you,” I say. God, this hiring process has been a whirlwind. I don’t even remember leaving my purse in my dad’s office, but it has to be since I don’t currently have it. “It’s hard to believe this is real.”
“Believe it,” Dr. Jones says with a grin. “I know we came off really strong just now, but this is a great team to work with. I hope you stay with us for a while.”
Nodding, I walk back with Barb to find my dad, sitting with her while I watch the practice in the stands. I’m itching for my phone as I notice the way the players interact, and how well social media is going to enjoy it too.
