The silence in my office is actually deafening. Everyone has gone home; the only light on is the one on my desk beside me.
“Well, then quit complaining.” I roll my eyes, even though I know she can’t see me. “I just wanted to call and tell you I might be a little late tonight. But I will find you when I get there. Noah said he’d pick you up without me.”
I frown because I can’t imagine what or who she knows in the city that could take her away from me tonight, having only been here once before.
“Ummm, ok,” I snap back without thinking. “What’s really going on?”
“What makes you think something is going on? Noah bought me a spa package, and it runs past seven.”
Not entirely believing her, I figure my brain is too messed up right now to try to figure out if she’s really lying, so I go with it. “Fine, but I’m not waiting for you at the door. Check-in with the bouncer. I’ll leave them your name.”
“Will do.” I go to hang up, but she stops me. “Hey, Gwen, have you talked to Rex lately?”
“Why?” I snap.
“Woah, prego. Just wondering.”
“Please tell me Noah didn’t just hear you? If you’re trying to find out if Rex knows, he knows, and I haven’t heard from him since.”
The line goes silent. My heart breaks as I take in the words I just spoke. The ones that kill me every time I think them. I told him everything, even about the baby, and he still has yet to reach out.
My hand goes to my stomach. My heart breaks for the child inside me who might never know the love of both their mother and father. I asked him to take a stand. I asked him to say it, to finally tell me how he feels. That is all I have ever wanted, and he let me walk away. Just like every time before.
“I’m sorry,” Eva whispers.
“C’est La vie, right? Je vois la vie en rose.” I mumble as I try to act like it doesn’t bother me.
Eva’s laugh fills the line.
“Whatever that means.”
“I see life through rose-colored glasses,” I explain.
“Ok, I think this New Orleans voodoo is getting to you more than you care to admit. I’ll see you at the club. And hey, everyone always looks at love like it’s all sunshine and rainbows. They never tell you about the days in between. Real love encompasses it all. The bad moods, the fights, the stress, the sleepless nights as you build a life together. The compromises and putting the other person first. Sure, you get your sunshine and rainbows, but not after a little rain. Just remember all of that when you’re looking through your rose-colored glasses.”
She hangs up the line, and I turn in my chair to look out the window, pondering what she’s just said.
My whole life, it will always be Rex. There could never be anyone else.
But you can’t love a man who won’t love you back. I know he cares for me. There is no denying that. But I need more. We need more. My guard is finally down. All my walls have been broken, and so far, I don’t see Rex anywhere.
29
Gwen
Glasses crash to the floor beside me. I jump as waiters and bar staff swirl through the kitchen. Grabbing my stack of papers, I hurry through the crowd, pushing my way out to the floor, and soon hear Aaliyah’s voice through my earpiece.
“There is an issue at the door.” I barely make out above the noise of the club. “A fight broke out from people waiting too long to get in. I can’t find the opening act, either. I swear I told them eight, but it’s ten after.”
I curse as I push through the double doors onto the bustling dance floor. Why we ever said we would cater this first night, I have no clue. I look to my right and see the makeshift dining area we set up for those who cared to sit and eat the entirely too expensive appetizers we decided on.
“I’m on my way, and Aaliyah, find that damn opening act now before I really lose my shit.”
Not only has this night been a total disaster since Noah picked me up, I ripped my skirt and broke a heel just for starters, but now everything has fallen down around me -both inside and outside the club. And like magic, Rex, Michael, hell, even Eric are nowhere to be found. Classic. Not like I could expect much more, but it would’ve been somewhat nice to have a little damn support on opening night.
I weave through the crowd and spot Eva just as I hear Aaliyah again through my headset. “I got outside covered. Troy went out there and made his presence known if you know what I mean?”
Well, damn, at least one of them is good for something. Eva waves me over, and I figure it might be nice for a brief break from the madness, so I make my way toward her.
