She squares her shoulders like she’s pulling together every ounce of strength she has. “I know what I mean! Don’t tell me I don’t. This is what I want, and you aren’t listening. You said you’d train me on how to get out of situations I don’t want to be in.”
I stare at her, silently begging her with my eyes not to do it. Because if she does, that’s it. I’ll have no choice.
“This thing we got into together is one of them, Denver.”
She looks me straight in the eye as she lines up her kill shot.
Her lips part and her whisper carries one word that shatters my entire soul, tearing us so far apart that we’re no longer existing in the same universe.
“Mitt.”
41
SINCLAIR
ONE WEEK LATER
“You should eat something.”Sullivan grunts in disapproval, eyeing my mug as I lift the coffee to my lips.
I drop my eyes from his, no energy left to have the same discussion with him again. I swallow the liquid, ignoring that it’s too hot, instead savoring the sweet tinge as it burns its way down to my stomach.
Vanilla.
It’s all I’ve been able to stomach since he left. I try to convince myself that the aftertaste on my tongue is the ghost of one of his kisses. That there’s still a part of him that exists within me somehow.
Denver left six days, twenty-one hours, and seventeen minutes ago.
And a part of me died.
I feared he might have tried to kill Brad after finding us together. But he didn’t. He just turned and walked away without looking back. The second I said that one word to him, he was gone.
My safe word.
He took himself out of my life, just like I knew he would. But the fact I pushed him to it doesn’t make living in the aftermath any easier. In fact, it’s worse. Because I’ll have to live my life wondering about the what-ifs. About what could have been if I’d chosen differently.
Being selfish or being selfless.
Either way he would have ultimately been the one who paid the price. And I’d have been the cause.
“What are your plans for today?” Sullivan asks, still eyeing my coffee mug like it’s the root of all evil.
I balance it in one hand, stroking Monty with the other. He has his head resting in my lap, looking up at me with sad eyes as I sit on my sofa. Animals always know when you’re hurting. I wish he could understand why Denver left, and that it wasn’t his fault, it was mine. Because I know by the way he runs to the door every time someone knocks on it that he’s hoping it’s Denver.
It never is.
It’s Zoey, Mikey, Halliday, Sullivan, my father, Uncle Mal. Everyone else whom I love, all taking it in turns to come and check on me since they noticed I’ve not been myself. It’s as if they have a rota planned out to make sure I’m getting out of bed each day.
But never him. Never Denver.
I shrug instead of answering my brother, and he exhales with an exasperated sigh, planting his hands on his hips, curling them around the midnight blue fabric of his suit pants. He has a meeting with the giant London-run company who provide business insurance for Beaufort Diamonds today.
I glance at my watch.
He’ll have to leave any minute now unless he wants to risk being late.
“You need to do something.”
“I’m taking Monty for a walk later. And I’m going to the store to get ingredients to make cupcakes with Molly for her sleepover.”
