“I work too much. My hands are dirty.” I crossed my arms over my chest. “And I couldn’t even keep you?—”
Her hand landed on my mouth. “No. Don’t ever say that again. You did all you could do. There are only so many background checks you can run. Your dad was planning that from the moment he was exiled. He’d created his own little sleeper cell. You had no way of knowing. Do you really think Thomas would have allowed that to happen if he could have prevented it?”
My hand covered hers and pulled it away from my mouth. “I hear the words, but I can’t stop the thoughts.” The words came out barely above a whisper. I just didn’t know how to let it go.
“I know you aren’t sleeping well because of it. Those dark circles are getting worse.”
“I’ll be fine. I just need a little more time.”
She held my gaze for a moment. “You fell asleep almost instantly earlier when I put on TMNT. Wanna see if you can get through it this time?”
“Sure.”
“Why don’t I move to the end of the couch? You can stretch out, and if you fall asleep, your neck won’t be at a weird angle.” As she said it, she scooted to the end and patted the space next to her.
I shook my head. “I’ll be fine.”
The next thing I knew, she was grabbing me by my good arm and pulling me. “Come on. I don’t need my own personal zombie apocalypse.”
A bark of laughter erupted. “Fine.”
Admittedly, once I was stretched out, it was as if my bones had turned to mush. “Either this couch is the most comfortable thing I’ve ever been on, or I’m so tired that a slab of concrete would work.”
Cora palmed the spot over my heart, her finger lazily making a circle. “Get some sleep. I probably won’t be far behind.”
I rested my hand atop hers. I didn’t believe in fairytales. I didn’t believe in love at first sight. I didn’t believe in any of it. I was a concrete thinker, but the peace that I suddenly felt was indescribable.
It was like I’d found my rock.
A rock I couldn’t keep.
Because I deserved to drown, and I didn’t know if there would ever be enough time to stop feeling that way.
Sunlight filteringthrough the living room blinds pulled me from the deepest sleep I’d had in months. For a moment, I couldn’t remember why I was on the couch instead of upstairs in bed. Then it all came back in a flood. The nightmare, wandering downstairs, and Cora insisting I stretch out to watch cartoons. This time I don’t even think I’d made it past the first note of the TMNT intro.
I was still tired, but there was something different about this sleep. It was restful. Peaceful. The weight against my chest and the soft breathing against my neck explained why. Cora had laid down next to me sometime during the night, her arm draped across my waist, fitting against my side like she belonged there.
I fished my phone out of my pajama pocket and quickly checked the time. Nearly seven a.m. Court was in two hours. Man, I hated to wake her up, but we couldn’t afford to be tardy.
“Hey,” I said softly as I brushed her hair back from her face. “Cora.”
Her eyes fluttered open. She gave a soft moan, and her eyes promptly shut.
“We have to be at the courthouse in two hours.”
“I’m a quick shower taker. Fifteen more minutes.” Her eyes remained closed.
There was a short pause, and her eyes flew open and widened. “Uh.” She clamped a hand over her mouth. “Morning breath.”
“I’ll live.”
She squeezed her eyes shut and partially buried her face in my arm. “I’m guessing you were having a nightmare. I thought about waking you up, but you were already so tired. I thought…” She sighed. “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry? I feel better than I have in a while.”
Her eyes opened again and they raked over my face. “Based on the way you were thrashing, it was a pretty bad dream.” She leaned up on her elbow. “Does that happen a lot?”
She had enough on her plate. Her sister’s death. A baby. A custody battle. I wasn’t going to put anything else on her. “It was just being in a new place.” I smiled. “We should probably start getting ready, though.”
