“Do you want a relationship with the guy or…”
“Yeah, I want to marry him,” I say seriously.
It’s an honest confession. I would love to be Alix’s sister-in-law and spend summers in Nantucket, sipping champagne by the pool, reading. Who the hell wouldn’t?
Dylan lifts his head, lifting his brows. “Shit,” he murmurs. “You want to marry him?”
I laugh it off. “You know me. I see the biggest one and want that one.” I walk to the kitchen to place our empty cups in the sink.
He calls over the couch, “Biggest what? What if he has a small dick?”
I laugh. “I doubt it.”
He cocks his head, checking out his ankle. “I don’t know, Moo. If you could swallow him whole–”
“Then it’ll be the best blowjob of his life.” I plop on the couch, needing to change the subject. “What about you?”
“What about me?”
I lean against the cushion and turn on the TV, opening Netflix. “I told you my goal, so what’s yours?”
“I don’t have a goal. You asked me to help you, so I am.”
I flick through the categories, searching for the family section. “What about Marina?”
“I don’t know what you mean,” he says. He is clueless, like every other guy. She sends him every possible signal, yet he has no idea what I mean. Come on…
“You could go out to dinner with her to see if there’s something there.” I scroll through the family movies, trying to decide which cartoon to put on.
“Nothing’s there,” he mutters.
I press play on a random movie and turn to him. “Okay, so tell me who you think you could date.”
He purses his lips. “Nah.”
“Come on,smut,” I plead.
He shakes his head. “I don’t want a girlfriend. I don’t want to date.”
This reminds me of Scott’s question about where Dylan is getting his satisfaction from.
“I’m putting you on a mission,” I exclaim. “And you can’t give me any excuses.”
He looks at me. “A relationship is too much, Ce. I’m serious. I don’t want to date.”
“Why not?”
“It all changes when you decide to commit, and then these girls become obsessive. Like all they want to do is hang out or docoupleshit. It’s annoying as hell. I’d rather save it for when I’m ready.”
“Oh my god. Are you emotionally unavailable?”
He laughs.
“You totally are. Well, that’s good news for this situation,” I motion my finger between us. “Because I don’t need you obsessing over me.”
He watches the TV. “You don’t need to worry about that.”
“Good.”
