She’s a year younger than me, but younger in maturity by much more.
“Yeah,” she begins to explain, stuttering. “Well, no. But yeah. You know, he’s just––”
I stop her right there. “I get it. Why don’t you go ask him out?”
Her jaw drops for a moment. “What? Why would I do that?”
I shrug. This girl knows nothing about me, and by the looks of it, she would never be my friend. I’m too forthcoming, and it’s not everyone’s style. I’m not for everyone, but onward I go. “He’s never in here, and it’s the perfect time to put yourself out there. Why not? The worst that can happen is he says no, and you never have to see him again.”
She exhales dramatically. “You live in Cecily’s world, where it’s perfect. You can get any guy you want, but for girls like me who look like me? It’s not like that.”
I give her a long look because I’m so tired of hearing that fucking story. Do you know what happens when you’re born beautiful? Sure, people stare. Sure, people put you on a pedestal. Sure, it comes with perks. But… and that’s a big butt… bigger than the Kardashians…butit comes with many downsides. People use you. People expect more. People are not themselves around you. People can be fucking rude and brutal. People are jealous. I can go on and on.
She continues, “And if we’re standing side by side, he’s going to choose you.”
I shake my head. “I tried to be friends with him, but he brushed me off.”
Her mouth hangs open again, so I bop her nose and say, “Stop comparing yourself to me. You’re just as worthy and deserving and beautiful, okay? We’re all only human.”
She grumbles under her breath but looks over at him and shrugs. “I’m not approaching him.” She exhales. “I’m going to go, but I call dibs on him then, Missy Miss. I’ll shoot my shot if he keeps coming around, okay?”
I nod and shrug. “Okay. It’s fine with me. I’m not that girl, Marina.” I force my lips together. “See ya later, alligator.”
She leaves, and I finally feel like I can breathe. This conversation was the most I’ve ever had with her, and I can’t let her insecurities make me feel bad. I’m so tired of feeling bad all the time. I’ll hide from the world if I do, and I’ve done that before. Never again.
I grab a dumbbell and push myself into squats, watching myself in the mirror. There’s only one way I know how to burn off frustration, and it’s this.
My sets are squats, Bulgarian split squats, hip thrusts, and now I’m on the floor to do band exercises when a shadow looms over me.
I fear that it’s Cory, waiting to talk my ear off about his last construction job. He’s a middle-aged man, single as a Pringle, and wants a gym mommy. I know this because he told me this.
I finish my set and sit on my heels, trying to catch my breath. But the shoes near me are not Cory’s. They’re actually pretty big feet.
“What’s your name again?” Dylan asks when I look up. I offer a quick smile. He holds out a hand, and I take it to stand.
“I’m Cecily.”
“Like the island?”
I try to catch my breath, nodding. Maybe he’s not a complete idiot with that God awful haircut. Most people think Sicily is a country. “Like the island, yes, but spelled with C-E.”
“That’s unique,” he says, like every other person I’ve met.
“Thanks,” I wave him off. “Yeah.” I place my hands on my hips and look up at the ceiling.
“We can be friends,” he says, and I meet his gaze. He points at the treadmill. “You kind of caught me off guard back there, and now that I’ve had time to think… I think, sure, why not?”
I huff out a laugh. “You mean, you had an endorphin rush, and now you’ve come to your senses?”
He shrugs. “Don’t come at me before I’ve had my workout or before I’ve had something to eat. I don’t make the rules.”
I smile. Finally, I have my breath. “Well, yeah. I need friends my age. That girl back there earlier? That’s the most she’s ever talked to me, and Cory? Just stares at my ass.” I crinkle my nose. “Do you have any friends, because it would be great to have a friend group?”
He watches me closely as I wipe down the weights. “Yeah, no. My friends will definitely talk your ear off and stare at your ass, so you’re out of luck.”
That makes a bubble of laughter rise, and finally his smile reaches his eyes.
“I’ll tell you what,” I say, putting the weights back. Then he grabs the rest and helps me. “Oh. Thank you.”
