He whispers, “Words are important too?”
I nod, nudging him with my elbow. “What’s going on?”
He searches my face as if it holds the answer. “If I kiss you right now––”
“I haven’t brushed my teeth––”
He shakes his head. “I don’t care.”
“I care,” I say, but he doesn’t deflate. He keeps his eyes on mine. “But why do you want to kiss me?”
He runs a hand through his mullet and says, “I always want to kiss you.”
“Always?” I scoff, surprised by that.
He nods.
“But we’re just friends.”
“Friends that fuck,” he corrects.
My heart races. “But if you want to kiss me whenever you want…” I trail off, unsure if implying something more is a good idea or not.
His eyes stay on mine as my heartbeat pulsates through my body. I think his might be too.
My mind is screaming at me to ask,Are we more than friends, but my mouth won’t say the words. Am I making this up? We agreed on what this would be. We both agreed that neither of us wants a relationship. We also decided not to do this again. What if I say the wrong thing and lose him? What if we end up wanting different things?
I lean forward. “Talk to me. Don’t leave me guessing.”
He finally presses his fingers against my face. First, he puts my wet hair behind my ear, and then he runs his fingers on my lips.
“I can’t get you out of my head. I didn’t call this past week because… homework, yeah, but also…”
I suck in my bottom lip, wetting it. He watches the motion.
“Because I don’t want to scare you away.”
I lean in closer as my heart races out of control. “Scare me away how?”
He presses his thumb against my lips, rubbing it back and forth. “By wanting you all the time. I don’t think a best friend should want their best friend the way I want you.”
I bite my lip again and squeeze my thighs together. “And how do you want me?”
“Any way I can get you?”
“You said you don’t want a girlfriend.”
“You said you don’t want a boyfriend.”
“So, what’re we going to do?”
He kisses me.
His lips are soft, his breath tastes like fresh mint, like maybe he was planning to do this. I lean into him, enjoying the fact that he wants permission to kiss me whenever he wants.
I run my fingers through his hair. His hands slide up my shirt. Our skin-on-skin makes me tremble. I reach for him, wrapping my legs around his waist.
He lifts my shirt, putting his head underneath. My breath catches as he kisses my stomach and travels up to my chest. I glance down at him, feeling his tongue on my nipples. I arch, reaching for him. He pulls my shirt off and then his. He smashes his lips against mine, and my chest aches for him. He’s being so gentle and thoughtful. I pull him closer, needing his pants off right fucking now. I tug his shorts off and stroke him, staring into his eyes.
