One word.
It nearly undoes me.
But thinking of him seeing all my blood and getting it all over us both and the couch and our clothes…
I press my palm to his chest and I’m surprised his heart is beating so wildly. I know he’s turned on, and he wants to fuck me, but something about his pulse sounds frantic.
“No, Storm.” I say it quietly, and I still keep my eyes closed.
He freezes above me.
I think of Remi and Cortland andhim.What happened between all of them, and the heartbeat of fear is back.
But Remi lives with him, with her baby, and she wouldn’t if she didn’t think he was safe.
After less than a heartbeat, he slides down my body a little, then rests his head on my chest, his arms bracketing me, his face turned toward the back of the couch. I don’t know why, but it comes naturally to me to wrap my arms around him and slide my fingers into his hair, massaging his scalp.
His body, so rigid before, seems to deflate, relaxing entirely into me. He’s so heavy and it’s kind of hard to breathe, but I don’t want him off me.
I hold him tight with one arm and scratch his head with my nails with the other, and I let my eyes stay closed.
Silence settles between us, low music playing from the movie running without anyone watching.
Peaceful.
After everything that happened in what was probably five minutes, this, by contrast, ispeace.
He’s never laid on me. I hugged him once, but that’s as far as it’s gone.
This feels almost more intimate than sex. Like he needs me for some reason.
I wonder why he seems so tired. So panicked.
So…stressed.
And now he seems to feel so safe here. With me.
“Sloane,” he says, his lips moving against my ribcage, where my crop top has shifted up thanks to his warm body.
“Yeah?”
“I’m going to move now or I never will. You’re going to lay in front of me. And I’m going to rub your back. I promise I won’t try to fuck you.”
I smile at that, holding him closer to me. But I feel a little hurt too. Why doesn’t he want to try and fuck me? I know I said no, but I still want him to want it.
I’m damn sure not going to turn down a back rub though. “Okay.”
Slowly, he gets up and I force my eyes open in the darkness. Our gazes don’t meet, and we rearrange ourselves how he wanted, my ass to his hips, I’m propped up on an elbow, he has one arm beneath me, holding me close, and with the other, he starts to knead my muscles.
Fuck.
It feelsso good.
I don’t say a word as I let my eyes drop closed again, then slowly turn my forearm so I’m resting on it instead of having my elbow up.
He digs deep into my muscles, moving from my shoulders to my neck, then down again.
I zone out, relaxed now so long as I avoid looking at the handgun on the table.
