“When I ...”she paused, took another deep breath, and started again.“When I was kidnapped by Captain Lee, he didn’t just kidnap me.He raped me to get back at Adam,” she blurted out.
Jonathan shot to his feet.“By God, the bastard is a dead man!”
“Please.Let me finish,” Elizabeth begged.“This is hard enough as it is,” she whispered and waited until he sat back down.“I didn’t find out I was pregnant until a few days before the wedding.I wanted to marry you, but I couldn’t be dishonest and pass off another man’s child as yours.So I ran.I—I knew how you felt about Captain Lee, and I didn’t want you to hate the child.
“Oh, how I wished the child wasn’t within me.Then I realized the child was part mine, and I could never do anything to hurt him.So I felt the simplest thing to do was leave.”She got up and stared blankly out of the porthole.“I left with Annie and Derek and went back to Briercliff.
“I—I also couldn’t bear the thought of you offering to marry me out of pity,” she continued before he could comment.
“I have a beautiful little boy who looks a lot like me.Sometimes I think he looks like you, too.”Elizabeth turned back to Jonathan.“You know, Dawson could have just as easily been our child.That’s why I named him Dawson.After your father.”
“How do you know he isn’t my child?”Jonathan asked.
“I can’t honestly answer that question,” Elizabeth said.“Accepting the shame of being raped has not been easy.It was my fault that I wandered too far from Four Oaks.It was my fault that I was so weak that Lee overpowered me.I have no way of ever proving that Dawson is yours.I have protected him from everyone because I didn’t want the word ‘bastard’ associated with his name.So mainly I’ve stayed at Briercliff.And if someone asks, I’d tell them I was married for a brief time and my husband died.”She admitted the truth graciously and hopefully.“I am truly sorry, Jonathan,” she said with light bitterness.
Jonathan said nothing as he watched her.He drew in several deep breaths to regain control.He felt as if someone had just delivered several heavy blows to his abdomen.
“Elizabeth, I couldn’t possibly hate your child, but I can’t honestly say what I would have done if you had told me,” he admitted.“I don’t think any man can predict what he’ll do until he is faced with the situation.However, you did not give me the chance to find out,” he said, turning her to face him.“I don’t like the fact that another man has touched you.No!Hurt you.”
“I know I’m unworthy of your love, Jonathan,” Elizabeth said in a dull and troubled voice.“But it doesn’t change the way I feel about you.”Her voice choked, and she had to wait a moment before going on.She looked down at her hands.“I have loved you forever.I’ve just made some stupid mistakes and now I’m paying for them.”
“Elizabeth!”Jonathan cut her off.He hated to see what she was doing to herself.He waited for her to look at him.“Over the last several years, I’ve tried my best to forget you.Didn’t care if I lived or died in the process,” he said, his gaze never leaving her face.“But no matter how far away I went, it never seemed to be far enough.You were there in my thoughts and my dreams no matter how much I wished you away.”He smiled, realizing he couldn’t deny the evidence any longer.“God knows, I’ve made my own share of mistakes.”He raised his hands in a helpless gesture.“Who am I to condemn you?There is one thing I have found out, and I guess I learned it the hard way like you did.”
Elizabeth’s eyes brimmed with tears.“What is that?”
“That you cannot run away from love.Love finds you, no matter where you are or what you are doing.It’s the most powerful emotion a person can experience.And, Elizabeth, I do love you.”
Tears slipped freely down Elizabeth’s cheeks.“Jonathan, you don’t have to be kind.I don’t want you pitying me.”
Jonathan drew her to the bed and gestured for her to sit.He sat on the bed beside her, putting his arm around her.“I love you, Elizabeth.No matter how stubborn and difficult you can be.And I’m through trying to ignore these feelings.”He tilted her chin up so he could look at her beautiful face.With his thumb he wiped the tears from beneath her eyes.
“Please make me forget,” Elizabeth pleaded.“Just for a little while, Jonathan.Please make me forget.”
Jonathan didn’t hesitate.With his heart hammering foolishly in his chest, he grabbed for the chance to make Elizabeth his, and, he hoped, to erase all the old wounds.
His mouth felt like a warm, silken heat against her as his lips began to work their magic, promising fulfillment, something she desperately needed.Elizabeth’s pulse leapt with excitement as a delightful shiver of desire ran through her.
As her hand roamed across his back, she felt his hard muscles beneath her probing fingers, but it wasn’t enough.She wanted to feel the warmth of his skin next to hers.
With trembling hands, she began to undo the buttons on his shirt until she could push it open.She pulled away from his mouth and began to trail warm kisses across his chest.
“Jesus,” Jonathan whispered, and held her away from him.“You know the way to drive me mad,” he said with a smile.“Turn around so I can unhook your gown.I need to feel your soft skin as well.”
The smoldering flame in his eyes made Elizabeth tingle, and she obeyed.With expert fingers Jonathan unlatched each hook.When he finished the last, he let her bodice fall to her waist, but instead of turning her around he pulled her back next to his chest.His hands came around to cup her breasts as he nuzzled her neck.His breath was warm on her neck.
“You feel so good, sweetheart,” he whispered, his breath hot against her ear as he fondled her breasts through the thin fabric of her chemise.Needing to feel her flesh, soft and warm, he tore open her chemise, his hands reclaiming her soft mounds.He looked down over her shoulder at the tempting nipples that had hardened to tight little peaks.She was blessed with the body of a goddess, and he was blessed to possess it.Rubbing her tight nipples between his fingers, he heard her soft moans of pleasure.Her breasts surged at the intimacy of his touch.
Elizabeth gasped as the delightful sensations ran rampant through her body.The mere caress of his hand sent warm shudders through her.She looked down and watched Jonathan’s fingers playing with her nipples, producing a heat that spread over her with such swiftness that she felt dizzy.
Suddenly, he spun her around to face him.He lowered his head and began to tease her breasts with his lips and tongue, circling each nipple over and over as his hand slid lower until it settled between her legs.He began to rub with just the right pressure.
Her breathing became shallow as his tongue caressed her nipples.He kissed her again and again, as he drove her crazy with his fingers.The massage sent currents of desire through her.She finally tore her mouth away.“W-will you stay with me tonight?”
“I’ll stay,” Jonathan said.He released her and removed the rest of his clothing, and watched as Elizabeth removed what was left of her chemise and her stockings, revealing her long legs.
When she’d finishing undressing, she came back to him.She wrapped her arms around his waist.Her warm skin melted into his.The junction of her legs caressed and teased his manhood.His hand moved gently down the length of her back.
“I’ll stay with you forever,” he whispered, his tongue tracing the outside of her ear.He felt her shiver as he plunged his tongue into her ear.The minute he did, she collapsed against him in total abandonment.He swept her up in his arms and carried her over to the small bunk and lay beside her in the tiny, cramped space.
