Jolting, I whirl around. A friendly-looking woman in black heels and a blue skirt smiles at me, her arms full of books.
“Ah.” And that’s when the water in my mouth spills down my chin. I’d forgotten to swallow.
Her eyes widen in alarm as I fumble to wipe away the mess. “Sorry about that. I just—”Forgot I had water in my mouth.
The only thing one can do when faced with embarrassment is laugh. I laugh and laugh until the girl gets understandably freaked out and flees.
No point in wasting anymore time. Striding down the hall with renewed purpose, I enter a large office. Again, open-floor plan. It’s mostly people sharing computer space at long tables in the center of the room. In the corners are bean bag chairs, reclining seats, televisions, bookshelves. Lounge areas for relaxation. I gloss over all of it, searching for a head of shaggy dark hair.
I spot Noah almost immediately. He’s the only one wearing all black. Once more, I repeat my dad’s words under my breath. “At least I tried.”
It’s almost as if Noah senses my presence. Before I even reach his table, he lifts his head from his computer and goes absolutely still. Like a summer evening without a hint of breeze.
God, I missed him. I missed his face and the wariness in his eyes. His awkward way of moving. He wears a Super Mario shirt. A half-eaten granola bar sits on his table, and one of his pant legs has caught on one of his socks. What a nerd. I can’t stop staring at him. He’s the most beautiful thing in this room and I pray he’ll give me the time of day to say what it is I need to say.
People halt their tasks to study us in curiosity. I hardly notice. Noah is the only person I see. I’m sucked into his gravitational pull. With each step toward him, I’m reminded again of all that I have to lose. Kneeling by his side, I look into his dark eyes and whisper, “Hi.”
He’s struck dumb. My attention is drawn to his throat as he swallows. The lock of hair falling over his forehead, as if he brushed it aside while working. It takes all my willpower to remain still, to not toss him over my shoulder, shove him into a dark closet somewhere, and have my way with him.
I’ve given a lot of thought to the fall out between us. The only conclusion I’ve come to is that you forgive those you love. You just do. Noah pretending to be Kellan was a lie, but everything we shared? That was true.
“You’re here.” It’s the only thing he says.
It’s enough.
I spent the entire flight practicing a speech, but now that I’m here, it all flies out the window. There isn’t anything I can say to Noah that I haven’t shown him. It was he who hurt me, and he probably thinks I hate him. I’m here to tell him hating him is the last thing I feel, and I’m willing to give this another shot, on the promise that each day starting now will be spent in honesty and trust.
“I probably should have warned you I was coming to visit,” I begin, aware of all the eyes on my back. “I went to your apartment yesterday and Kellan told me you’d already left for your internship. What I want to say to you isn’t something that can be said over the phone.” God damn, my palms are sweating. “What I’m trying to say is—”
“I’m sorry,” he whispers, and then, to my horror, his face crumples. I don’t think I’ve seen anything more tragic than the agony twisting his features, the quaver of his mouth and hitch in his breath, and the tears that begin to fall steadily, as if he’s been holding them in all this time and, only now that I’m here, allows himself to feel. “I’m so damn sorry, Max. For everything.”
Then Noah leans forward and hides his face against my chest, his long arms winding around my neck, his hold so tight it makes my throat ache, my heart soar from the sheer closeness I feel to this man.
My body can’t help itself. The moment our skin touches, small fires light at the point of contact. I draw him as close as he can get, his legs slipping from the chair so we’re both kneeling by his table. The office has gone absolutely quiet. I’m almost afraid to look for fear of ruining the moment—the feeling of being with Noah and no one else.
“I wanted to tell you,” he says against my neck. His arms tighten involuntarily. “Every time I saw you I wanted to tell you I wasn’t Kellan, but I was too afraid of losing what we had. I was afraid you’d hate me.”
“I don’t hate you, Noah.”
His body shakes with trying to hold in his sobs. “You should.” His voice cracks. I shoot evil glares over his shoulder at how nosy his coworkers are being. A young woman starts and returns to her computer. The rest follow her example shortly after. “I was trying to tell you at the game that it wasn’t pretend for me. And then you walked away and I didn’t know how to fix it and everything just went to shit.” His tears dampen the fabric of my shirt. “And I’ve never met anyone who accepts me so completely. Not even my own family—”
“Hey.” Drawing him away, I cup his face in my hands. “Loving someone means forgiving them, even when they hurt you. And I do love you, Noah. A lot. Enough to want to make this work.”
As the tension leeches from his body, he sags against me. God, I want to plant one on him, but with his coworkers present, I’m wondering if that’s even appropriate. “It sounds nice when you say it.”
“I love you?”
“My name.” Pulling away, he smiles at me. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a smile like this from him before. Whatever reservations he’s had, they’ve finally fallen away. “But that too. I feel the same. Loving you is probably one of the easiest things I’ve ever done.”
“It’s true, you know.” I brush a lock of hair from his eyes. “I do love you. I think I did from the moment I saw you wearing that Zelda shirt. A nerd through and through.”
His gaze is deep, intense, and heartfelt. “You can do it, you know.”
“Do what?”
“Kiss me.”
I don’t bother hiding my surprise. “You don’t mind?”
