“Not enough,” he says, and crushes his mouth to mine.
Chapter 15
Noah
Somewhere between arriving at the car wash and now, my self-control flew out the window. I’m someone who prides himself on stable emotions. I’ve mastered the art of an uncaring state. My feelings, hoarded behind high walls where, for the most part, they aren’t seen, not by anyone.
And if I wanted to kiss you again?It was as if Max tapped into my mind, pulled out what I truly wanted. Another kiss, but more. More open, more desire, more setting ourselves free, letting it lead us to a finish. Now our mouths are hungry, devouring, our breaths harsh and grating, the air full of soft moans, a curse here or there. Hands wander. Touch, stroke, caress.
My hips grind against his. Max’s back rests against the trunk of a tree. We’re the same height, though he’s broader, big hands, thick thighs bunching with power. I’ve been staring at this man’s thighs for the past three hours and I can’t help but grip the outside of them, loving the way my fingers sink into the meat. He enjoys it, judging by his soft, “Yes.”
Dry humping on a college campus. I’ve reached a new low.
I shouldn’t want this. I feel like shit lying to him, pretending to be my bastard twin. If he ever finds out my true identity, he’s the one who’s going to get hurt. The last thing I want to do is hurt him, but I can’t seem to help myself from pushing this further.
Suddenly, his fingers dig into my waist, and he flips out positions, sending my back against the tree, his chest to my front, and that long, hard rod jutting against my inner thigh, where my own cock rests hot and heavy. I fight the groan, but I can’t hold it in. It fills his mouth, and my tongue fills it too, and the previous gentleness of the kiss is a thing of the past. It’s a hunger. A devouring. Our tongues fight for dominance, and our hands wander, fingers digging in all the soft and hard places of each other.
“God. Kellan.” His voice is so low so as to be nonexistent. “I’ve imagined you against me for months now.”
The sound of my twin’s name makes me falter, but I pick up the slow thrusting against him a moment later. “Oh?” When it comes to sex, I’m generally a vanilla person. I’ve had a few hookups, though no relationships. I like the expected. Sex in bed. Maybe, if the mood calls for it, the floor. Or maybe I haven’t met the right person who makes me want to break all the rules. But Max—he makes me want to take risks. “Wh-what else?”
“What have I not imagined? Kissing you. Touching you. Shoving my dick up your ass. Having you stretch me as well.” His groan tapers off to a whimper. The sound goes straight to my groin. Impossibly, I harden even more. It’s been so long since I’ve wanted anyone. With all the time spent working on school and video game design, I have absolutely zero social life. I was happy with that. Until I started spending time with Max and he showed me what I was missing. Connection with someone.
“My legs are shaking,” he manages. His soft laughter drifts to my ears. Bumps roll down my arms that have nothing to do with the outside temperature and everything to do with how warm and smooth the sound is. His body is a furnace. “That’s you. You’re the one doing that to me.”
Fumbling for his dick, I reach inside his boxers and palm the hot, throbbing skin. He curses. God, he feels good. Like heaven. I give Max a few strokes, spreading his fluid down the shaft, before shifting closer and doing the same to my own.
I’m pumping both of our cocks at once, and the scrape of his skin against mine heightens sensation, makes my balls draw up tight against my body. It’s so good. Too good. Max’s hand latches onto my upper arm, and I think he wants to tug me closer, except there’s nowhere else for me to go. We’re as close as we can get.
“I want you to know,” I manage between my clenched teeth, voice rough and unrestrained, “that I hate attention. I hate being the center of it. I also hate running. So fucking much. All I want to do is create video games. That’s all.” The truth is spilling out as the tightening in my balls reaches a point of excruciating pleasure-pain.
Max pants against my neck. His fingers dig into my sides. Somewhere beyond the clump of trees we’ve hidden behind, his teammates are cleaning up and will eventually come looking for us. He doesn’t even seem to care or notice that I’m speaking from the mouth of Noah, not Kellan. I want so badly to say who I am, but I can’t. I want to pretend I am Kellan, the person he wants, for a little while longer.
“Give me a truth,” I whisper. My breath clouds the air. I lean back to get a better look at Max’s face. “One thing you want to get off your chest.”
“The truth?” The question snags as I slow the pace, drawing up the pleasure through his skin. “Lower,” he says, voice pitched higher.
I move toward the base and adjust the angle of my hand so I’m giving him more coverage. A shudder rolls through him. I feel it through my body. It fuels my desire, makes that fire burn, higher and hotter. I trace a circle around the engorged head. One of my fingers inches to the space behind his balls, and I stroke it with a gentle touch. He chokes out something I can’t recognize. A plead?
“The truth,” I repeat.
A flush darkens his cheeks. Sharp desire glints in his eyes. “The truth is I don’t think someone like you wants someone like me. And you—you—” He cries out, and I slap my other hand over his mouth to muffle the sound. The last thing we need is one of the guys to investigate.
He goes on, his eyes boring into mine, shining, full of heat and promise. It stops the breath in my chest. “I jerk myself off daily with you on my mind. Imagining all the filthy things I want to do to you. You think it’s easy for me to watch you during practice? Sweating, with those dark eyes staring at me.”
Heat stains my cheeks. The things he says...
A deep, growly sound echoes in his chest, in my ears, in the air around us. His fingers spasm. I’m again imagining that first kiss between us, no more than breath. Then later, in the nights that followed, how I couldn’t sleep because my mind was filled with images of his mouth so close to mine. The long hot showers with my arm braced against the tile, my hand wrapped around myself, my blood hot as fire.
And now my hand is wrapped around both of us. His dick is thicker, wider in the head, but mine is an inch longer. Our legs brush. Our feet are planted in a way where I’m almost standing inside his parted thighs. We rut like animals, Max pushing himself in and out of my hand as our desire slicks both our shafts.
My mind goes blank. What will come after this? I can stop now. It’s not too late. Touching him, going down this road, will lead to hurt, and yet I’m racing too fast to stop. I want to watch Max’s face as he comes, knowing I did that to him, to us both.
“I’m close,” I say.
He crushes his mouth to mine, kissing me as if this is the last we will ever see of one another, as if this kiss is an extension of what we’re doing with my hands, and his hands as they cup my face. Despite the brutal sucking of his lips, his hands are gentle. His thumbs coast along my cheeks.
“Me too,” he murmurs against my mouth. “Speed up a bit.”
