She looked at me while streams of tears cascaded down her cheeks. "This isn't me, Atlas."
She sobbed.
"I can't use this huge thing on you. I don't even know how to. My goal isn't to kill you or tear up your insides. I just wanted you to empathize with me and understand that what you did was wrong. I wanted you to take my place for a few minutes to see how it feels."
She wiped her nose with her hand.
My pet is always so ladylike.
She looked at me, still crying.
"I needed you to experience what it's like to be as helpless as I was." She threw her hands up.
"I can't even use the flogger on you, for Christ's sake! I want to grab Tuna and be on my way with no trouble from you. I want my life back."
Tears were running down her face as she sadly looked at me. "I want kids someday, Atlas. My choices should be my own. I don't want another person to do that for me. I was ready to accept my placewith you until I overheard your plans with Yara, your brother, and the other guy."
She crossed her arms over her chest.
"The reality of that conversation hit me like a ton of bricks. I finally realized that I was truly with a killer, and that frightened me, but when you told me you were going to sterilize me, that was the nail in the coffin."
She shook her head adamantly, holding her ground.
"I can't go for that, Atlas, and I won't. Let's say you had me sterilized. You would have taken something vital from me- something I could never get back, and I would never have forgiven you for it. You would have stolen the very essence of who I am, and if I died trying to get away from you, so be it. I swear to God, I would take my life if that were to happen. My decision to have children is not yours to make."
She fell to her knees, sobbing. "Please, Atlas, just set me free. I won't go to the police, I promise. I want only what was mine to begin with. My freedom."
She put her hands over her face, sobbing. Her little body was quaking and trembling.
Iwasfeeling remorseful for everything I had done to her.This was not supposed to go this way. Visions of my mother flashed through my mind. My father yelling at her. Him beating her while she cowered in the corner, screaming for him to stop. My brothers and I were terrified and bawling because we couldn’t help her. This is not what I want for her.
"Kitlyn, don't cry. I want you to calm down before you get sick. Get a hold of yourself. I know you hate me, and I probably deserve that from you, but I needyou to be my good girl and pull yourself together right now. Can you do that for me?"
She gazed at me with a surprised look on her face, nodding. She was no longer sobbing, but her voice cracked, revealing the depths of her sadness.
"I don't hate you, Atlas. I don't want to hurt you or humiliate you. What I want for you is for you to find peace within yourself. You can beat me; you can keep me tied up and locked away, but I won't let you take my right to have children from me. I would rather die if it came to that."
She stood up and grabbed the remote from the table.
This was it. She was leaving me.
My cock was no longer stiff. It felt as if my heart was ripping apart. She didn't violate me or use the flogger. If I were her, I would have used both without mercy. She showed compassion, something that I am entirely devoid of.
Her emotions stirred something profound within my black heart. I realize now she has become more to me than just a fuck toy. Sometime within the past month, I developed a slight soft spot for her; I didn't want to admit it to myself.
Although the thought nipped at the back of my mind occasionally, I wasn't fully aware that I cared for her until a few minutes ago. The reality was sobering. I don't want her in a depressed state all the time.
That would kill me. I am a brutal man, and I know I will only want more from her if she stays with me because Idoenjoy marking her skin; that is just who I am. I never really hurt her, but the scenes wouldbecome more intense, and I needed her towantto be with me for that to happen.
Although I used the belt and flogger on her, I made sure she had her pleasures, too. Being cuffed to a table leg was fucking embarrassing, especially by a slight girl compared to me. It was almost fucking comical, but she did it out of desperation, and like an idiot, I allowed her the opportunity because I was smitten with her and gave her permission to lash out at me. Now look where we are. I let her get under my skin, and I shouldn't have, but it was too late.
I no longer saw her as an object to fuck so that I could get my rocks off. I saw her as a person with feelings, and that just screwed up my plans for her…for us.
I know if I moved forward with the sterilization, it would completely break her. Although my initial goal was to shatter her and put her back together again, things have changed these past few weeks.
The thought no longer makes my dick hard.
I think I am the one who is broken. Imagine the evil bad boy Atlas, defeated by a mere one-hundred-and-twelve-pound little girl? I would never have believed it if I weren’t living it right at this very moment.
