Chapter 1
Charlie
God, I miss sex.
Getting lost in the moment, hot and sweaty. The heavy breathing, grunts, and dirty whispered words. That feeling of absolute euphoria when they’re hitting that one spot that makes you see stars. Not that I have a whole lot of experience in any of that. Don’t have a lot of notches in my bedpost, if you know what I mean. But I’ve read enough romance novels and done enough self exploration to know what I like, and apparently debasing myself by bringing food to my kinda-sorta boyfriend’s office and begging him to fuck me is the low that I have stooped to in order to make it happen.
Not that Brad really deserves it. It's been weeks, WEEKS, since he's come over, or taken me on a date, or even made a late-night booty call which is how all this started. He claims he's been working late and really busy. Fine. I won't argue with him about that. He is my boss's boss after all. Chief financial marketing operator of sales .... or something. I literally don't even know his job title. What I do know is Brad is important to the company, and our relationship is on the down-low because of it.
It would be very uncouth for a bigwig like him to date a lowly secretary like me. Not to mention completely against the rules. Management is not supposed to fraternize with the administrative staff. Brad justified it to me at the beginning, saying that he wasn't MY boss, so it was a grey area. I think I was so lonely and happy for the attention that I didn't even care.
It started with a smile. I was new to the job, and I’ve always been so awkward when it came to making friends. I mean, I am always friendly but breaking that barrier between friend and friendly was something that I have just never been able to figure out. But he smiled one day as he came out of the conference room on my floor, and it was so dazzling and out of place that I immediately developed a crush. I’m not even sure if I found him all that attractive. I’ve never been into blondes, and I’ve always preferred taller men. But he sure was muscular and well put together. And he looked at me. And smiled at me. Apparently, that was all I needed. Every day that week, when he came out of that meeting room and I saw him, he smiled. And I swooned.
Then, those meetings stopped. I didn’t see him anymore and missed that smile. I told myself I just needed to get over it. I was disgusted with myself for being so desperate over this small amount of attention. I tried to tell myself that and that’s when the texts started. Brad must have gotten my number from my employee file or something … I never even thought to ask. I didn’t care how he got it; he was flirting with me. ME! Where I come from, that’s unheard of. Guys like that don’t pay attention to girls like me.
He was giving me all the attention I needed, and then some. Of course I fell for him. And when that first “Hey, you up?” text showed up I jumped at the opportunity to return that attention and show him …proveto him that I was worth the time.
Besides, we've been careful. We barely look at each other at work and basically act like we don't know each other at all until we're alone together. I mean, I’d prefer if we didn’t have to keep it a secret, but Brad says it’s safer this way.
The fact that I am willing to break our rule about not conversing at work shows how desperate I am getting. I think it will be fine though ... it's late. It's Friday. If I catch even a hint of someone else in the office, I'll turn right around and forget the whole thing.
I hit the elevator button and make my way up to the top floor where Brad's office is. Lucky for me, it's quiet up here and the only light I see on is the one coming from his office. My heart thrums with excitement as I make the short walk to his officeand stops cold when I open the door to see what's happening inside.
Brad has no problemfraternizingwith his own secretary at work apparently.
Bent over the desk, right where I hoped I'd be in the next half-hour, is his newest assistant Olivia. Skirt bunched up around her waist, and her large breasts squished against the desk as Brad viciously pounds into her. She spots me first, freezes for a moment, then reaches her hand behind her to smack Brad who still hasn't noticed me. He freezes now but doesn't say anything. He just stares at me, one eyebrow raised, looking at me like I’m the problem in this scenario.
You have got to be kidding me.
I don't say anything either. What could I possibly say in this situation anyways? I just drop the takeout in the doorway of his office where it lands with a thud, then a splatter. I can't lie, I was hoping he might chase after me, shout an apology, literally something. ANYTHING.
But he doesn't. My body overheats with these extreme, polarizing emotions as I stand and wait for the elevator, but it quickly turns to anger and disgust as I hear the distinct sounds of them starting up again.
I won't cry. I won't cry. I won't cry.
I let myself get on the elevator and the doors just barely close before I start sobbing.
Chapter 2
Charlie
Monday morning arrives wicked fast considering it was the longest weekend of my life. I went full cliche after leaving the office Friday night and bought a shit ton of ice cream and scarfed it down while sobbing and listening to the saddest playlist I could find on Spotify. That was how I spent the entire weekend. I didn't really know what else to do. I have no real friends here, and my parents were on their way down to Mexico for the winter and I didn't want to bother them. I actually hadn’t even told them about Brad yet so that would have been a whole lecture in and of itself and it's better to just avoid it anyways.
Oh, for fuck sakes, I'm covered in melted ice cream.
No wonder Brad doesn't want anything to do with me anymore. Why would he have my over emotional, messy ass when he could have the beautiful, gorgeous Olivia with huge boobs who exclusively wears fuck me skirts to the office. He's not exactly a prize himself ... pretty average dick that he doesn't really know how to use and blond hair that he slicks back Malfoy style. That gave me the ick, but I looked past it because is body was incredible and while he wasn't complimentary, he didn't seem to mind mine.
Hindsight is a real bitch. He didn’t even treat me that well and here I am, an overly emotional mess because he acted like the pig that he’s been showing me he was all along. He wasalways pushing me to go to the gym and hiding me away. I told myself it was because of the work-thing, but I knew deep down he was embarrassed about how I looked. Why did he even want to be with me anyways? Was I scratching some sort of fetish itch for him?
Ugh.
I get out of bed, stripping off my t-shirt covered in gooey, left-over ice-cream and hop into the shower. I can't afford to miss work, so I guess I'm going in. Thank goodness Brad and I don't work on the same floor. Hopefully I can avoid him and use my lunches to look for somewhere different to work.
If I'm lucky, I'll never see the cheating douchebag again.
Was it even really cheating though? We never discussed exclusivity, only secrecy. Maybe I'm missing something here ... I texted him yesterday asking if we could talk and I still haven't gotten a response. Maybe he's mad at me for dropping takeout on his carpet and running out.
But a small part of me is roaring, telling me he has no right to be mad at me and that I should be madder than I am at him. But I just can't seem to find it in myself. Above all else, I feel disgusting. I hate how he makes me feel, but at least he wanted me. Past tense of course being the whole thing here.
