“I’m serious, Holly.”
“So am I.” And serious irritation twisted her face, made her voice sharp. “He’s my friend, not my partner. He has this whole huge, amazing life, and you know what? I love that. He knows I love that. I also know how bad it hurt Caitlin — and him — when Lenora didn’t want to accept her at first. Do not think I won’t draw that parallel for him if he kicks up a fuss, which he won’t because we haverulesabout not getting up in each others’ lives. And hewillfollow them.”
Well, yeah, because Lamar was nothing if not a stickler for rules. Oh, he could get sideways sometimes, but somehow he always kept it between the lines. Colt had been that way, too, until he’d veered toward complete destruction. He tried to be like that now.
“I don’t want to mess up your life.”
“I don’t think that’s a possibility, Colt.” Her mouth firmed. “We have got to do something about your self-image.”
A bark of laughter escaped, scraping his throat. “My self-image is fine. I am a realist, though, and my track record speaks for itself.”
She crossed her arms, tightening the fluffy white knit over her bust. “I’m not entertaining that with you.”
Fine by him, but that incident when he was nineteen, the nosedive of his most recent relationship, and his mama’s disappointment in him made a pretty solid argument. Takingthings slow meant he could protect himself while she discovered the things about him she didn’t like.
“So.” She relaxed her expression and stance with a visible effort. “I’ll handle him, we know how I shouldn’t touch you when—”
“It was your tone.” The words spilled before he really thought. A frown knit his brows together, forehead pulling. “Not the way you touched me.”
“Okay.”
He shrugged, pressing his fingers around the edge of the counter until his knuckles ached. “I don’t know why.”
Her nose wrinkled with a half-grin, half-grimace. “Childhood shit is like that sometimes. I get super weird about not having plans made when something is important. I made Lamar crazy over our trip to Houston. It all goes back to my daddy being unreliable.”
“Unreliable.” He nodded, a slow dip of his chin. “And you want to date me.”
“Enough of that.” Rolling her eyes, she pointed toward the living room. “Come on. I came over to spend time with you, not listen to you down yourself.”
She had a point — he’d much rather hang out with her than think about everything wrong with him. He did okay, and he knew his strengths. At the same time, he knew what a prize he wasn’t.
Any desire he had to wrap up with her and make out a little had died a serious death, though.
“There’s probably a quarter or so left in the game.” He leaned down and snagged the remote from the coffee table.
“It’s a rout.” She settled onto the middle cushion. “And after Tennessee lost to Alabama.”
“Those boys didn’t want to listen to Kirby if they lost.” Flicking on the television, he took the end cushion on her left. UGA was up by two more touchdowns with twelve minutes to go in the fourth quarter.
“There’s no way they can close that gap.” Holly plucked the remote out of his hold, navigating to the streaming service landing page. “Let’s find a movie or something.”
Content to sit with her, Colt stretched an arm along the sofa back. His fingers wanted to shake, still, and he flexed them.
“What is up with the half-finished foreign film?” She curled closed into him, faded magnolia and orange blossom tickling his nose. She always smelled sultry and sweet . . . when she didn’t wear the traces of medical disinfectant.
“It’s pretty decent.” He didn’t curve his arm about her shoulder or tug her into him. “The guy’s trying to survive an alien invasion.”
“It has subtitles?” She gave the screen an askance look.
“You took Mr. Davis’s class.” He lifted the remote from her easy hold and reset the film to the beginning. “You know how to read.”
“Ugh.” She dragged a hand through her hair, tousling the bright strands, sending a whiff of magnolia over him. “This better be good, Colton. Now I have to actually pay attention.”
A genuine grin pulled at his mouth, and he slumped deeper into the cushion, still not letting his arm fall about her. He was okay with that demand on her cognitive ability.
As long as she was parsing subtitles, her attention wasn’t on him. If she was reading English translations, she wasn’t parsinghim.
Tonight, nerves on edge in a way he’d never been able to explain, he liked it that way.
