A pause hovered, and a puff of laughter escaped him.
“Or that I don’t do her the same way.”
“Please. You’re the light of her life. She talks about you all the time.”
He fixed her with that askance look once more and grabbed one of her outdoor platters from the shelf. “Yeah, she loves me, but I am not what she wanted me to be. She knows it, I know it, but it is what it is.”
His too-casual acceptance hurt her heart. “What exactly do you think she wants you to be?”
“He’s four days older than me.” A wry twist of his lips, he crossed his arms over his chest. “College degree, career his mama can be proud of, and Lord help me, now he’s married with a kid.”
“Colt.”
“I’m just stating the truth, Holly.” He shrugged, the line of his mouth tight. “I get a lot of ‘Why can’t you . . .?’ from her. I don’t think she even means to do it, and hell, I probably deserve a lot of it.”
“No, you don’t.” She scowled. “Don’t say that.”
“That sweet heart of yours is ridiculously soft.”
“Colt.”
“It’s okay.” He lifted one steak, then the other, to the platter, added the kabobs, and shut off the gas. The burners sputtered out. “I’m used to it, and it’s not even about me, not really. It’s her anxiety.”
Holly narrowed her eyes. Well, if she could find a way to stop it, she would. He deserved so much better than that. She was going to have to spend some time with Sue.
“She, um . . .” He cleared his throat, crossing to set the platter on the table before going back for plates and cutlery. “She was surprised I got a promotion.”
Annoyance sizzled along Holly’s nerves.Damn it, Sue. Unfolding, she used the busyness of setting her laptop aside and grabbing a couple of bottles of water to cover her reaction. Yes, she would definitely have to spend some time with Sue.
“That must have hurt your feelings.” She set the bottles down with brisk movements and raised her gaze to his. “I’m sorry.”
“Like I said, it is what it is.” He lifted a hand in dismissal and pulled out her chair, waiting until she was seated before folding into his own. He transferred a steak and kabob to her plate, then his. “I know she loves me.”
“Colt.” She covered his hand, squeezing lightly, wanting to love on him and make it better.
“Holly.” He rotated his hand in hers, linking their fingers. A grin played about his mouth and disappeared, and he shook their joined hand in a slight jostle. “If you want to date me, you listen to me fuss about my mama, but you don’t worry about trying to fix it. I’m used to it, and I know she loves me. It’s all good.”
Clutching his hand, she swallowed ano, it’s not. Knowing where his boundaries lay was a good thing. She and Scott hadn’tknown what those were, and they’d blown past them without realizing.
With a forced smile, she picked up her fork and waved at her plate. “You should be careful. I could get used to this.”
He harrumphed, cutting off a piece of steak. “Knew you were using me.”
With her fork, she slid the grilled vegetables off the wooden skewer. “You have no idea how I want to use you.”
“The word isslow, Holly.”
“What does slow look like to you?” Genuinely curious, she watched him chew over his steak and the question.
“More than two dates.” Chasing his food with a slug of water, he shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s different with everybody, so slow for us might be a week. It might be a month. We’ll figure it out.”
She slapped a hand down on the table, and he jumped. “We’ll figure it out?”
“Yeah. What?” A mushroom speared on his fork, he waved it sideways. “You want us to put a timetable on our phone calendars? It doesn’t work that way.”
Didn’t he realize she was not a figure-it-out kind of girl? She liked plans and checklists and, yes, damn it, she loved a calendar. Even though she was all about spontaneity, she loved structure and certainty, too.
He slumped back in his chair, studying her. “What did slow look like with the other guys you dated?”
