I hear his protests immediately, but I laugh them off as I shut the door behind me and head to class. I’m already running late. So I start jogging.
I barely make it to class on time and head straight for the empty chair in the back. When the instructor comes in I pretend to take notes. But really I’m just checking to see if she responded to my message.
She didn’t.
My heart deflates a little. I really thought she would.
I set my phone on my desk. Face up. Every few minutes I hit the screen, lighting it up, hoping for something.
But there’s nothing.
Just before the end of class, it happens.
She messages.
Cove: I did. Sorry I didn’t respond yesterday. I was busy editing the video. It goes live in a couple weeks. I’ll make sure to message you before it happens.
The nerves hit, just as my body reacts and my mind even catches up.
It starts as a flutter—light, shaky, almost delicate—just beneath the ribs. Then it spreads. My heartbeat picks up like someone’s pressing fast-forward, thudding hard enough I’m sure everyone can hear. I can almost see them all turn in their seats to stare at me. My breathing changes too, slipping into shallow breaths not deep enough to give me the oxygen I need.
My hands tremble, not wildly, but in a way that makes every movement feel suddenly clumsy. The palms of my hands are warm with a thin sheen of sweat even though my fingers feel cold as ice. My knees begin to bounce, all ability to control them completely stripped from me.
A knot develops in my stomach, twisting on itself, pulling tighter with every anxious thought. It almost feels like it’s clawing its way up my throat, making swallowing difficult with each second that passes.
The worst is all the thoughts spiraling through my mind. I’m about to be live for everyone to see.
It’s taking everything I have to hold myself together. To come to terms with the fact the video will be uploaded soon. It’s not like it’s a surprise. I knew this was going to happen. It’s just reality is different than knowing.
I go through the motions of the day.
Another class. One I actually have to pay attention to since I have a test next week. One that I can’t afford to fail.
Then there's lunch.
As normal, I meet Tanner. But, today, I have to answer a million more questions about the date, until I finally make an excuse to leave.
Thank goodness my phone was actually ringing and I could tell a little white lie that it was Mom. In actuality it was a fucking telemarketer.
I managed to make it through my shift at the gym. Thankfully, today was a short day. I only needed to be there from one to five.
When I walk in the door with dinner, seeing Tanner sitting on his bed, smiling widely isn't something I was expecting.
“Now, back to this friend. And by friend I mean female. She needs to have a pussy, breasts and an ass I want to take a bite out of.”
“Tanner, I asked, she said no.” Lie but he doesn’t need to know.
“I get it. You’re afraid if she meets me on this double date that she’ll dump you.”
I’ve had it.
“You know I think I’m moving out. Heard Alex is looking for a roommate and he’s nowhere as annoying as you.”
Tanner gasps, and I hold back my laughter.
“Fine, you win. I got a date anyway.” With that he gets up and leaves.
Finally, there’s peace.
