"I know what the point is," he snapped. "You think I'm here because I'm in love with Harlow?"
"I think you're here because you could be in love with her someday," I said.
I knew my brother. He didn't fall that fast. He was the kind of guy who didn't fall without being dragged downstream, kicking and screaming. On the outside at least. I suspected there was a lot more going on, on the inside, than even I knew.
"All of this speculation is cute, baby brother," he said sarcastically, "but do me a favor and save it. I'm not falling in love with her."
"If you just—" I cut myself off when Harlow appeared from the kitchen.
Whenever she stepped into my line of sight, was like a jolt of electricity. Driving all of the air out of me. Coherent thought and legible words left my brain, abandoning it like a sinking ship.
"This almost looks back to normal," she said, her gaze scanning the room. She lingered on the place where Erin had lain, before shaking her head sadly. Her red ponytail swishing back and forth.
"We tried to put everything back exactly where it was," I said. "Except those two tables there." I pointed. "I thought maybe they looked better… We can put them back if you… We shouldn't have…"
While Jules chuckled at my babbling, Harlow waved down the suggestion with a side-to-side shake of her spread fingers.
"That looks better than how we had it," she said. "If you come up with any other suggestions, don't feel like you can't bring them to me. I'm always open to ideas to make the place better."
"Lighting," Jules said. "You have warm lighting in here, but cool would look better. I mean, that bulb over there is cool, but the rest are warm." He pointed to one that glowed blue, while the rest looked closer to yellow.
Harlow looked up and frowned. "You're right. I've been meaning to do something about that. Can you fix it for me?"
Jules looked surprised at her agreement, blinking a couple of times before giving an indifferent shrug I didn't buy for a second.
"Sure. There's a place around the corner. Let me go grab some bulbs and I'll be right back." He gave her a curt nod and headed for the back door.
"Thank you for that," I said when he was out of hearing. "He wants to be useful, but I don't think he's figured out how."
"It's nothing." She grabbed the back of a chair and moved it slightly. "Those bulbs really do need to be changed. That'sthe problem sometimes. Details like that are easy to put on the 'someday' list. But really? They're so important. It's like the difference between having a tall candle between two people having a romantic dinner, and a low one so they can see each other. That stuff, I'm all over. Looking up at the ceiling? Not so much."
"People can't deal with everything all the time," I said, stepping over to place my hands on her shoulders and massaging lightly. "Not even you."
"This is my business, it's my job to notice everything." She dropped her head forward, letting me rub up to the back of her neck and ease out the knots.
"And if you can't, then you hire someone who can," I reasoned.
"Like you and Jules?" She glanced back at me for a moment.
"Exactly," I said. "Who knows, we might give up our other jobs and work for you instead."
I was fortunate in that I could do my job from anywhere, so I'd be fitting in a few hours after this. Jules worked for himself, so he could take what jobs he needed, or not. Whatever suited.
"Let's see how good you are at working for me," she said teasingly. "When things get busy in here, you might think again. It can be hectic."
I wasn't going to lie and say I loved when things were hectic, but I loved her. That was reason enough to be here, with or without the threat of Eros. If I had to deal with some chaos, I'd deal.
"I can take it," I said. "So can Jules, he just pretends he can't. He likes you, you know."
"I'm not sure about that," she said with a laugh. "Sometimes I think he'd happily throw me in front of a cab and walk away."
"He wouldn't really," I assured her. "First of all, I wouldn't let him. Second of all, he likes you more than he'll admit to himself. He'd probably stand in front of that cab first."
"I don't blame him," she said softly. "I don't mean the standing in front of a car bit. Losing someone you love, it makes you scared to feel close to anyone again. I'm sure you feel the same way too."
"Yeah," I said more grudging than maybe I should have. It was easier for me to talk about my feelings than it was for my brother, but it was still awkward.
"After Auggie died, I didn't want to talk to anyone for ages. I wanted to sit in front of a computer and kill aliens, monsters, whatever. Blowing them up, blasting them apart or disintegrate was satisfying. I could take all of my anger out on them. But then I realized I wasn't helping myself. Auggie wouldn't have wanted me to lock myself away."
