“I’m—I’m just…” And now I’m stuttering.
Mortifying.
“Holy shit,” Sai breathes, staring at Kane like he’s just witnessed a miracle before slowly turning to me. “What Kane just said.Ditto.For all of us.”
That earns a subtle nod from Ezekial, and a slower one from Julien. And that makes me laugh, that, for once, they’re all agreeing withKane.
I clear my throat, trying to recover and refocus. “I’m just trying to work out why you all feel…” I scan their faces, trying to isolate the source, but it’s all of them. “Dread... I think?”
They glance between one another, silently making a decision.
“Mon âme,”Julien says gently, “you feel dread because we’ve only just uncovered a truth. One we’re still coming to terms with ourselves.”
Kane shifts slightly, his voice becoming softer. “I can feel you now, your power.” He pauses and his shadows creep up and over me, settling my racing heart with their familiar chill. “I’ve realised how strong you really are. How you’ve always had control of the dark, that you didn’t need any training. It was the rune holding you back.”
My heart gives a strange little beat.
Ezekial meets my gaze next. “The dark is wild and chaotic. Some beings can’t control it, and become trapped in the realm. Mastering it often takes decades.”
Sai’s voice follows, soft and careful as he asks, “How old do you think you are, Red?”
I frown, then laugh, shaky. “What does that have to do with anything?”
“The darkness obeys you.” Kane’s voice is quiet, almost like he’s… awed. “You survived it. Endured it. Made it yours. That doesn’t come from training. That comes fromtime. From pain. From living.”
I swallow, the implication in his words becoming clearer.“…How old do youthink I am?”
Another pause, another glance passed between them.
Ezekial rubs the scar through his brow, adjusts his glasses, but never looks away as he finally says, “One hundred.”
“Give or take,” Sai adds, earning a sharp glare from Ezekial.
“A… a hundred.” The number echoes around me, my heart beating faster, harder.
“One hundred,” I whisper again, but it comes out wrong, followed by a ragged laugh, frantic and disbelieving. “But… but that would mean…”
I can’t think. My mind is all static and mumbled words as my breath stutters out.
“That would mean I…” I look to them, pleading, searching for something. Desperate for a lie, a distraction, a softer truth.
“Where was I?” It slips out.
My shadows unfurl, writhing up around me in tight, shivering coils.
I’ve only known five years.
Five.
Not one hundred.
Five years with my found family. Five years of wondering and pretending that was enough. Did they know? All that timeI was with them, did they keep that from me? And if they did, what else did they keep? What other truths did they hide?
We’d joked about my age together over drinks, guessed late twenties, early thirties. Not one hundredfuckingyears.
“But why don’t I… I haven’t aged?”
“The strength of your darkness will have stopped your ageing at some point,” Julien explains carefully, pausing to soften his voice. “But we are still uncertain of the effects your rune has on you. Whether it’s been suppressing your change into immortality… or hiding that you already are.”
