"You know, Mrs. Tucker has watched them an awful lot, and I know that she has really taught them about not being selfish, and sharing and loving other people. I'm afraid that I can't take any credit for that."
"I'd say you certainly can. After all, whatever they've been learning at home has probably been reinforced by Mrs. Tucker. Plus, they just have those natural abilities that sometimes you see early in people."
"I hope you're right. I guess that's one of my biggest fears. That somehow I'll screw my kids up irreparably and that it'll be all my fault. You know?"
"I totally get it. But I think that's what we talked about a little bit before. Just having faith that God's going to work things out. That whatever He's planned and ordained is exactly right. After all, there was nothing you did wrong to have those boys lose their father."
"No. And I understand that, but maybe I'm missing something. Maybe He had another father lined up for them, and I was just too focused on my work and on trying to keep my head above water toeven pay any attention. Maybe I've missed out on things that I should've been doing, or maybe I did things that I shouldn't—"
He put a hand up. She closed her mouth abruptly. "And you just have to pray and ask God to help you follow Him. And then, keep an eye on and an ear out, but at the same time, you can't sweat it. If God wants you to do it, it's not like He's going to tuck a clue in the far corner of the back forty, and you're going to dig a fifteen foot hole and use a microscope in order to find it. He's not going to make it that hard. He wants you to succeed. He's on your side. Or I guess I should say we're on His side, and He loves us. Just like a father isn't going to make his child's life miserable on purpose. A father is going to help him in every way possible. At least if he's a good dad."
"Do you see a lot of families that have parents that aren't good?" she asked, seeming to read his mind.
"I do. But that's not the point, is it? The point is, God wants you to succeed. And if you want to do what God wants you to do, I don't think that God is going to make it hard for you to figure out what that is. I just don't."
"Sometimes it seems like it's hard."
"Do you think we make it harder than what it needs to be?"
"I think I do sometimes. But other times, it's just hard to know, you know? Like... maybe I should've sold the shop and done something else to support them. Or maybe I should be more actively looking for a husband to be a dad. I just..." She bit her lip. "I don't want to make the same mistake again."
"Mistake?"
She pressed her lips together, and then looked over her shoulder.
"My parents didn't think that I should've married Cam. Maybe they were right."
"Is the food almost ready?"
Aiden effectively interrupted their conversation, just as Mark was hanging on her every word. What mistake had she made with Cam? Other than her parents not approving. He knew that she was estranged from her parents. Was that why?
He had a lot of things he wanted to talk to her about, but it couldn't be when the children were around and listening. Their conversation had been low enough, and the twins had been yammering between themselves, so he hadn't been worried about them hearing, but that was definitely not a conversation that would be meant for little ears.
Lord, if we're supposed to talk about this, please present the opportunity again.
Chapter 21
"I think they're asleep," Olivia said, as she backed away from the twins' door. It was cracked just a bit, and she could see them snuggled under the blankets, sleeping peacefully.
"All right. It's obvious that your side of the street is still dark, but I've got flashlights."
Mark held out a light for her, and she thanked him as she took it.
"Have you heard any updates?" Honestly, being with Mark in his house, spending the evening with him and the boys had felt like family. She really wouldn't mind staying, which made her feel like she really needed to go.
"No. I haven't heard anything."
"All right," she said, hating that she felt relief. Like she would have another night and morning in the kitchen with Mark, making coffee, laughing together, reading their Bibles and having devotions at the table as the sun came up.
She couldn't think of anything she would rather do. She'd never felt so comfortable with someone, and so... cared for without being smothered.
After she got her coat on and wrapped her scarf around her neck, tucking the edges into her coat, he opened the door for her, and they walked out onto the sidewalk.
"It looks so odd, with one side of the street being all lit up."
She had to agree. "I've never seen the town quite like this."
"I don't know that this is normal, but it seems to be a fluke of the storm."
