“No, of course not!” I shriek, not adding that if I would be dating anyone, he’s the only one I would want to date. “See? I miss this,” I tell him. “I miss talking to you.” Admitting it to him pushes me out of my comfort zone.
“No one is stopping you from talking to me.” His voice goes soft.
“I just—” I start and then stop.
“We’re friends, right?” he adds in.
I want to be more than friends, I almost say out loud instead of in my head. “We are.”
“So, friends talk,” he says, leaning against the pillows in his bed. “What’s on your mind?”
I think about it and tell him the first thing that is on my mind. “I hate that I missed so much stuff when it comes to my family.”
“Like what?” he asks me. I turn and sit up myself, propping up the pillows behind me.
“Like fucking everything.” He laughs at my answer. “Like the fact I wasn’t there when Matty and Sofia got married because Trent had just graduated and said he booked us tickets to Europe.” Kirby just rolls his eyes. “And I missed the gender reveal and the birth of my sister’s kids.” My voice gets angrier. “One, because he was going into his first clinical trial and the other because he took me on ‘our much-needed vacation,’ away from everyone.”
“Okay,” he says, “but that was then.” He tries to make me feel better. “You can’t change that, but you can change what you do going forward.”
“I want to do it all,” I declare. “Birthday parties, I’m there. Gender reveal, sign me up. Wedding, yes, please.” He laughs at me. “I’m not kidding, I feel like I just missed out on so much.”
“Lexi,” he says softly.
“Did you ever feel like this?” I ask him and he nods his head.
“When I left home for college, and I started living my life, and wasn’t under his thumb, I stayed away from my mother and my sister,” he admits softly. “I missed birthdays and Christmases. I even missed Kylie’s graduation, and I’ll never forgive myself for that.”
“Well, you definitely turned it around,” I tell him. “Now the two of you are closer than ever.”
“We are,” he confirms, “and I would die for her.”
“She’s an amazing human.”
“She is,” he agrees with a smile, “and she got the brunt of what that asshole did. She tries to pretend she’s okay and that nothing bothers her, but it’s a front. She’s never let anyone in for them to see how amazing she truly is. She’s afraid, and I hate that for her.” I suddenly feel so sorry for Kylie, and I make a mental note to open up to her more, hoping that maybe in some small way I can help her move forward.
“So I heard about your ex-girlfriend today.” I snicker at him and he groans. “Angela was her name.”
“My nightmare.” He shakes his head. “She was the complete opposite of you. She was a horrible human, a mean girl through and through.”
“Why did you date her, then?” I ask him, not sure I really want to be sitting here talking about his past girlfriend.
“Fuck if I know.” He runs his hand through his hair and he laughs. “I was young and stupid.”
“It was last year.” I laugh at him.
“Was I not younger then?” he points out. “I like this,” he says softly, “talking to you after the game while I wind down.”
“I like it too,” I admit to him, “but I’m going to let you go so you can get some sleep.”
“Okay, I’ll talk to you soon, Lexi.” He looks into the camera and into my eyes, as if he’s looking into my soul, sucking the air out of my lungs. “Sweet dreams.”
twenty-six
Kirby
“I’m home,” I say into the phone as soon as I get into my car. “The eagle has landed.”
“Wow,” Kylie says, “you really think highly of yourself.”
