Farah cleared her throat this time. “Lady Courtney is meeting with him today. Perhaps something will come from that.”
Blackstone nodded. “Now, if you would mind leaving us, Rockwell. I have some business to discuss with my sister.”
Rockwell looked at her as if asking should he stay, but she merely gave a slight shake of her head.
“I shall see you tonight at the opera, Lady Farah. I’ll be with Lucien and his family.” He silently wished her success with her brother. He was proud when he saw her head lift and she squared her shoulders noting the defiant slant of her chin. Blackstone was in for a surprise and a part of him wished he could stay to watch.
*
As soon asRockwell took his leave Blackstone sat in his large-backed chair by the fire that looked like a throne and indicated she should sit. Rather than taking her seat on the chaise lounge, she took the other high-back chair opposite him and noted with satisfaction as his eyebrow rose.
“I realize Lord Ware is a friend of this family and his sisters are your acquaintances, but you know better than to be in a closed room with him without a chaperon. I would at least have expected your lady’s maid to be with you. You know how rumors start and tarnish reputations.”
The lady’s maid you have spying on me? Not likely.“I didn’t notice it was closed. Lord Franklin must have closed it on his way out when R—Lord Ware arrived. And Lord Ware is a man of honor. He would do nothing to harm me or my reputation.”
Blackstone seemed to accept that, as he said no more. “What makes you think you know better than me as to if Lord Franklin is suitable? As your elder brother, I have your best interests at heart.”
“Do you? How is it that most other guardians know that Lord Franklin has a mean temper? How is it you seem unaware he merely wants a marriage to elevate his social status and an ornament on his arm? He has no genuine regard for me at all.Is that the type of married life you want for me—your beloved sister? Loneliness and fear?”
“Don’t be hysterical. Lord Franklin would treasure you. He knows he’d have to answer to me if he didn’t.”
She bit her cheek to keep from screaming. “I am not being hysterical. I’m merely trying to have an adult conversation with you. I’ve reached my age of majority and I will have a say in my future, and brother dear, Lord Franklin is not in it. Do I make myself clear?” She ignored the look of surprise and pressed on despite the anger that edged into his face. “Deep down I know you love me, but you don’t know me.” He was about to object when she asked, “What are my favorite hobbies? What do I enjoy doing? Do you know what charities I’m patron of?”
She sat staring at a brother who was so different from the youth he’d been before their parents died. As she’d grown older, she hated that she didn’t know him as well as she’d like to. He kept everyone at bay. He wore the mantle of ducal responsibility, as if it were the weight of a stone bridge on his shoulders. No time for joy or fun. He had suffered from their parents’ early demise as she had.
“I’m responsible for your safety and well-being. Know that I’d not let anything hurt you.”
“You’re the one hurting me if you think I’d be happy, or safe, in a marriage to Lord Franklin.” Her whispered words were not to shame him, but to make him understand.
He looked at the floor. “Why didn’t you tell me before that you didn’t wish to marry him?”
She sighed and shook her head. “I told you the minute you said he’d approached you about a match, but you wouldn’t listen. He is a humorless man, much like yourself, and my life with him would be suffocating.”
His head jerked up. “Humorless like me?”
The hurt in his expression made her move to crouch at his feet and take his large hands in hers. “I know Father dying young made you face a life of responsibilities far too soon. I cannot even imagine what you’ve had to deal with. But you used to laugh and tease me when I was little and I don’t think I’ve seen you laugh since Father’s funeral. What joy do you find in life?” When he didn’t reply, she added, “What’s the point of living if you’re not happy? Are you happy? I certainly want to be happy. But Franklin would make my life miserable.”
“Happiness? Responsibilities leave little room for happiness. I’m unsure what that feels like.” He gave her a wry smile and sat staring at her for a long moment. “You’ve grown up and I’ve missed it.”
She could let him off with that almost apology, but she wasn’t going to because he needed to hear how he’d changed. “You really hurt me when you wouldn’t let me clear Mother’s things.”
“I thought it would upset you too much.”
“It upset me more that I could not go through my mother’s belongings and remember her. Look at me. Really look at me. I’m stronger than you know. I’m capable of many things. I’ve organized this very special ball, for one.” She rose and straightened her gown.
He, too, rose to his feet. “Perhaps I should go hunting more often. What has occurred while I’ve been away that has made you suddenly speak up like this? What have you been doing while I’ve been away?”
Her face heated. She hated lying to him. “I have been a tad unwell, actually. Women’s problems again.” At his look of concern, she quickly added, “I was fine. Lady Tiffany and Lord Wolfarth took me in, and I stayed with them. I didn’t alert you because I didn’t want to ruin your hunting excursion. You needed to take some time from your duties. Being unwell, I had the time to think about my life and what I wanted. I want to behappy like Mother was. She loved Father. I quickly realized I’d never love Lord Franklin…or even like him.” She hung her head. “I think Mother would be ashamed of how I have not stood up for what I want and how I let you decide everything for me.”
“Mother would never have been ashamed of you.” His voice lowered. “Of me—perhaps. I have been a bully, haven’t I?”
She nodded. “Perhaps we could make some changes in both our lives. We should agree to break the fast together each morning and converse. And we should attend events and social activities together. Become a brother and sister again. I’m not the only one who should look to marry. You need an heir. But most of all, I want you to find a special woman who can help you carry the weight of all your responsibilities. Or perhaps I could help you find a woman suitable to be your duchess.”
He moved and drew her in for a hug. “You’re right. We both need to find someone we want to share our lives with. If not Franklin, do you have anyone in mind?” She tried not to stiffen in his arms. “Do you have your eye on Rockwell?” His voice held concern once more.
She shook her head. “The wanderer explorer?”
“I can see I shouldn’t have worried about you. Yes, he would not be a good choice if you want a loving family man. While I’m sure he’d treat his wife well, he’d not be home. Always off on some adventure.”
