Clearing her throat, Ruthi gathered her courage. “You need to know how much I appreciate what you did for me,” Ruthi stammered. “To help me understand I’m not…not…abnormal or weak. That wanting to be a submissive is natural for some people and there’s nothing wrong with it. That’s…that’s really all I had to say.” She twisted her fingers in front of her, wishing she were better at conversations like this. “Thank you, from the bottom of my heart. For everything. Maybe…maybe someday—” Her voice trailed off.
Eve shook her head slightly, clearly understanding where Ruthi was heading. “To be frank, coming to my dungeon on the mainland would be ill-advised, Ruthi, as much as I enjoyed our experience together. When you find your Domme, and I have no doubt you will,” Eve said with that odd note of resignation still in her voice, “you can use everything you learned under my instruction as a foundation for your service to her. You arewell on your way to becoming an excellent submissive, but only if you are committed to embracing that part of yourself freely.” She took a deep breath. “My best wishes for you always, Ruthi. I leave you with one thought before we part ways.”
Ruthi nodded, unable to prevent the tears prickling behind her eyes, her heart hurting. “I’ll listen,” she said.
“Trust, little one,” Eve whispered, moving closer to her. “Trust in the Domme who is honored to earn your submission. That precious gift you give to her, that belief and faith in her and her ability to teach you, to keep you safe, to cherish everything you are…trust in the magic the two of you will create together.”
Crying now, Ruthi stared into Eve’s brilliant green gaze, shocked to see a damp glimmer in the Domme’s eyes. Leaning forward, Eve kissed Ruthi’s forehead softly. “Goodbye, little sub,” she whispered as she raised her hand and stroked Ruthi’s cheek briefly. “Be well. Be happy.” And then she was gone.
Frozen, Ruthi stared at the closed door, feeling as though her world had ended. The Mistress cared for her, she knew, even loved her. But, based on Eve’s actions tonight, Ruthi’s previous hopes shriveled on the vine, her thoughts grabbing her with sharp claws.What would someone like Mistress Eve Mondragon—a very visible part of the kink community on the mainland and a professional Domme with an almost legendary reputation—want with a brand new submissive who had barely admitted what she was to herself, let alone shown she was ready to kneel proudly in front of anyone else?Eve didn’t do commitments. But even if she did, any submissive at her feet who belonged to her would be unapologetically visible to others in the community, unashamed of who and what she was in every way possible. Someone as different from Ruthi Shay as it was possible to get.
Is it possible to die from a broken heart?Ruthi wondered.Will I be able to survive being permanently separated fromthe Mistress I know is everything I always wanted and needed?Taking a deep breath through her tears, however, Ruthi suddenly clenched her jaw, determination firing through her.She belonged to Eve, in ALL ways. Her Mistress deserved a sub who felt no hesitation, no holding back, no indecision.But can I do that? Can I show the world I don’t give a fuck what they think? For Eve?
Moving down the hallway,ready to go back to her small cottage where she could hide for the rest of the night, Eve kept wiping her streaming eyes, keeping her head down the few times she encountered one of the staff in the corridors.Stupid. I am so STUPID,she thought.Ineverget involved with my submissives. Part of being a professional Domme was having the ability to keep her personal self detached from her professional self.I blew that one in spades, though, didn’t I?Ruthi had wormed into Eve’s heart before she knew it. Everything Ruthi was called to Eve’s soul in a way no other submissive ever had before.
While Eve had had personal submissives before, nothing had ever worked out for the long term. The core of her heart had always remained untouched. Eve had genuinely cared for them and took care of their needs, but whenever she and one of her submissives parted ways, there hadn’t been a tremendous sense of loss on her side. Figuring she was simply incapable of giving her whole heart and soul to a sub, which wasn’t fair to them, Eve kept her interactions strictly professional, convinced that it was the better course of action in the long run.
Ruthi, however, smashed through every barrier Eve had. Everything about the woman Ruthi was called to Eve’s soul, as though she had been made for the Domme. The problem, though, lay in Ruthi’s inability to be open about who and whatshe was, something that could have no place in Eve’s life. A challenge that had no solution on either side of the fence.
As Eve went out into the cool air, awash in rising moonlight and the scent of the tropical flowers that bloomed everywhere, the doors to her heart slammed shut even as she sent an entreaty aloft that Ruthi would find peace and love no matter where she went or who she belonged to. Some lucky Domme would find her, train her, then keep her as she realized her submissive was a one-of-a-kind light that every good Dominant in existence prayed for.
The blessings of the Divine go with you always, beloved, she prayed through a fresh bout of salty tears as she disappeared into the darkness.I will always love you, even though we weren’t meant to be. Neither will Ieverforget you. I hope all your dreams have come true, that the Isle of Dreams has brought you everything you ever wished for. Because no woman deserves it more than you do.
20
The day was postcard-perfect, with fluffy white clouds drifting across a limitless expanse of deep blue sky, beams of sunlight illuminating everything they touched with an enchanted glow. Playful dolphins frolicked off the shore of the lagoon’s shimmering turquoise waters where the prop plane rested. The dark shadows of fish and other sea creatures moved below the water’s surface in a sea teeming with life. The tropical foliage behind them was lush and bursting with color. Dappled sunlight wound its way through the verdant trees and bushes and filled with the music of the birds and wildlife that made the island their home.
Madeline, Kel, Ruthi, and Eve assembled on the spacious dock, waiting for Ms. Leighton and Antonia to arrive to see them off as the staff loaded their luggage onto the plane. The group was quiet, the rare conversations between them stilted, as each woman reflected on her experience. Just as Ms. Leighton had told them upon their arrival, the island was a place that gave you a chance to believe more, to do more, to be more, if only you had the courage to tackle your dreams head-on. Their lives had been changed forever, in ways that none of the women had everanticipated, because they had dared to go after their dreams over the last week.
A few minutes later, Ms. Leighton and Antonia arrived, walking the length of the pier and moving to the head of the group before turning to face them. “Sadly, our time together is at an end,” Ms. Leighton began, smiling at the group, while Antonia stood stoically beside her. “It has been my great pleasure to have you here on the Isle of Dreams with us. I thank you for the honor you have given me in allowing me to assist you in fulfilling your fantasies. My hope is that you have each made discoveries of value that you can take with you as you return to your lives on the mainland. Before I conclude my remarks, however, this is the time for you to share your own thoughts about your visit this week, should you feel the need. Of course, you are under no obligation to do so. However, guests typically make a few parting comments, if only to bid a more public farewell to the others.”
Her gaze was penetrating as she glanced at them. “Would anyone like to begin?”
For a beat, Ruthi hesitated.Can I do this?she thought.Can I live without Eve? Or can I be brave?Then she knew what she had to do. She raised her hand. “I will. I have things I would like to say to each person.”
Ms. Leighton gestured at her to go on.
With a deep breath, Ruthi faced Kel and Madeline. “First, I owe you two an apology. For reasons I’ll state in a bit, the nasty behavior I showed and the attitude I threw at you at the beginning of the week was not something either of you deserved,” she said, her tone still clipped but not unkind. “One day maybe, you’ll be able to forgive me. However, actions, not words, are what make apologies more than empty gestures.” Her gray gaze fell upon Madeline.
“Shooting that commercial with you gave me the opportunity to see your range and depth as an actress, not simply as a laugh track sitcom mom who fell prey to the typical Hollywood typecasting, Madeline. Of which I was the biggest offender when we first met.” The blonde actress was clearly startled. “Stop doubting yourself. You are worth far more than the joke in the room. Nothing can hold you back but you, my friend. I look forward to directing you in Kel’s film.” Tears ran down Madeline’s face at Ruthi’s words. “Make Hollywood see you, the real Madeline Whitley. Believe in your talent and your instincts because they will never steer you wrong—as long as you trust.”
Next, Ruthi turned to Kel, who had put her arm around an emotional Madeline. “As I’ve said, your screenplay was one of the best things I’ve read in years, Kel. Maybe ever,” Ruthi said, cutting directly to the chase. Kel’s eyes widened. “After I read it, not knowing who had written it because it had been left anonymously on my bed, I went to Ms. Leighton to ask her who the writer was. She was the one who told me it was you. And as I said at the lagoon, I want it. Your story? It’s raw… honest… gritty… real… exactly the kind of movie I like to direct. Again, when we get back to the mainland, I would like to sit with you and Madeline to discuss where we go from here. Just as I told you, the more I think about it, the more I can’t see anyone but Madeline in the starring role.”
The two women looked frozen in disbelief at Ruthi’s words.
“Trust in your talent, Kel, because it’s formidable. I suspect that after this movie comes out, and we win the Academy Awards I feel in my bones is more than possible, studios will be lining up begging you to write for them. You have a long, lucrative career in front of you, Kel Lehman. But these conversations can wait until we get home.”
With one more deep breath, Ruthi moved directly in front of Eve, who stood there quietly, with an enormous pair of shadescovering her eyes. Ruthi knelt before her, her knees opened wide, bottom resting on her heels, with her spine straightened and her eyes cast down, hands lying open on her thighs, palms up. “Permission to raise my eyes and speak, Mistress?” Ruthi asked softly but audibly and waited in the deafening silence for Eve’s response.
After a long pause, the Domme finally said, “Permission granted, Ruthi,” her voice giving nothing away. “But—”
“I am a submissive,” stated Ruthi in a decisive tone that carried over the entire dock, cutting Eve off. “In my soul, I’ve always known I have this need inside of me to hand the reins of control to someone else, although I didn’t know why. I thought… I thought I was abnormal. That wanting to submit to another woman meant I was mentally disturbed in some way.
“My ex-girlfriend not only cheated on me, she did everything possible to destroy my career in Hollywood after I refused to take her back, because I had been her meal ticket and she didn’t want to lose that. When I rebuffed all her attempts to get back together, she stole virtually everything in our house in revenge, then told the world I had abused her.” Sharp breaths came from Madeline and Kel. “While I managed to set the record straight in the end, my ability to trust was destroyed.”
Looking at Eve with tears in her eyes, Ruthi took a deep breath. “Ms. Leighton offered me a deal. If I would direct a commercial for her, she would grant me my fantasy of being a submissive.” A slight laugh came from her. “Dominants expect their submissives to give them their trust completely, but I figured there was no harm in going through the motions and pretending so I could protect myself. ‘Nothing wrong with that kind of pretense,’ I told myself. ‘Not for a mere week.’
“But then Eve, a Domme who has no equal, saw through my bullshit immediately and opened me up in a way I neverthought possible.” The inhabitants of the dock were deadly quiet, seeming to barely breathe at Ruthi’s impassioned words.
