“I didn’t wake when you came in last night,” she started.
“No.” His gaze didn’t waver. “I magically made sure of that. I needed some attention from Faelynn. My…meeting didn’t go as smoothly as planned.”
“Why didn’t you want me awake for that?”
He hesitated. “Because you needed your rest. And it…wasn’t pretty.”
She felt like smiling…and like cursing. He didn’t want her to worry. How cute. But it wasn’t his fucking choice to make.
Smoothing down her anger, she said, “Please stop deciding when I should and should not sleep. If I want to sleep and can’t, I’ll ask for help. If I want to be awake when you stumble in bloody and crying, you need to let me.” She shrugged. “If only so I can make fun of you for not being able to defend yourself.”
He watched her, his eyes starting to sparkle from the last comment. “Fair enough,” he murmured.
Now it was she who was watching him, noticing the tension in his body that he was trying to hide. The embarrassment…and the shame from the treatment he’d had no control over. That this court and those horrible creatures had forced upon him. That they, and the gods with them, needed to answer for.
Anger unfurled in her. She kept a tight rein on it, though. Anger wasn’t needed from her right now. Anger would come later.
Because of Dylan, she had a lot of experience in this role. She’d been the third leg of his tripod for many rough nights as his memories of the past had resurfaced. He’d occasionally needed someoneto help him out of the darkness, and he trusted her.
Sometimes all she’d done was listen, sometimes she’d raged, but she’d always made it clear she was there for him. No matter what he needed to share or what he chose not to, she took it in stride and returned unconditional love and support. And she would—if she ever saw him again—for as long as she lived. That was what it meant to be family.
Tarian wasn’t her family—far from it—but she wouldn’t turn away a wounded soul. She wouldn’t pass up the opportunity to help him claim vengeance. Fuck this court. Fuck those royals. Fuck those terrible gods who shit on their children instead of helping them.
She took a deep breath. Not giving in to the rage was easily the hardest part of this role. She constantly struggled with it.
“That dream…was your memory,” she surmised in an even tone. “The one Circus Tent Martha was talking about.”
He barely nodded. “You need to know why I will ask for various things from you. Why I need to make a show of my reaction to you.”
She shook her head slowly. “I don’t need to know why. I trust you, remember? What I need is to believe your reasoning is valid. And I do. I need to know your past in order to stand witness. I need to understand your pain so I know how to support you when you need help shouldering it. When it overwhelms you, I will stand in and be your strength. And so help me gods-that-actually-give-a-shit, if she tries to do that in my presence, I will?—”
She clenched her jaw.Easilythe hardest part of this role.
He grabbed her as though he couldn’t help himself, cupping her cheeks, his fingers diving into her hair. He kissed her passionately, his tongue delving into her mouth and tangling with hers. He held her in place, kissing her with everything he was, like it was a compulsion. A deep, desperateneed. She felt it with every fiber of her being, swept away with his taste. His touch.
They were both breathing hard when they separated. His eyes sparkled harder now despite the pain she saw there.
“So adorable,” he whispered, his tone gravelly and deep. “Your fury is refreshing, actually. I have always loved your viciousness. TheFallenare supportive and sympathetic. They are mad, but I think the years here have worn us all down. That was the most public display she’s ever done, but she has wanted to claim my desire since the very first time I set foot in this court. A big part of me thinks that’s why they killed Sansy the way they did.”
Sansy must’ve been his first love, whom he’d trapped with affection and they’d tortured to death in front of him.
“Well, as long as my anger is refreshing… We’re not going to die untilafterwe burn this motherfucker to the ground. How’s that? We will restore balance and all that, but we’re claiming vengeance on this bitch. I’ll fuck you on the floor in the middle of the court if that rubs salt into the wound. I don’t give two shits.Fuck that bitch. She’ll pay for what she’s done. They all will. I’ll make sure of it. You’re not family, but you’re all I’ve got. No one fucks with all I’ve got and gets away with it.”
“You’d be trapped, Daisy.”
She laughed. “I’m in Faerie. I’malreadytrapped. I’m absolutely fucked, actually, and since I’m sentenced to die, I might as well get a little pleasure out of it, huh? Want to knock this out right now? I’m game. I could use some pounding to work off some steam.”
A smile peeked through his solemn demeanor. Gold warred with midnight around his pupil. She could turn him on with only words when this court couldn’t do that with magic, hands, or mouths.
“Not words…just you,” he said softly, his eyes open and honest.
She leaned toward him and gently ran her thumb under his eye. “Why do some fae have that ring around their irises and some don’t?” she asked, remembering Eldric and the princess. “Your memory said royalty, but Eldric didn’t seem royal.”
He trailed his fingertips along her arm. “It denotes an elevated station in Faerie,” he replied. “Royalty in the various kingdoms have it, the color matching their throne. Here, it is obsidian. The Diamond Throne’s is gold.”
“Not…diamond?” She dropped her hand and he caught it, stopping it on his heart and keeping it braced there. She could feel the slow, rhythmic pulse under his smooth, warm skin.
“No. I asked Eldric once why that is. He never answered me.” He shrugged. “He chooses which of my questions to answer and which not to. So he says. I think he simply doesn’t know and never thought to look it up. For me, after I was…stationed here, obsidian replaced the gold in my eyes until…you. I have no idea why.”
