Granny would’ve been able to feel it. Any alpha would.
“No.” I shook my head. “Granny couldn’t have known.”
He was my captor, I would expect something like this from him. But Granny? She’d been my family. She’d saved me. She wouldn’t have kept me?—
Helpless. Dependent.
The truth felt like a slap.
Prior to the last few days, I wouldn’t have believed Granny capable of it. I would not have trusted this man to be telling me the truth, not over her. But now, after taking a hard look at other aspects of my life...
Without magic, I’d had to stay in that village. I’d been very clear about that. I welcomed her walls, her cage. I learned to make her product and do it exceptionally so that she would never have cause to toss me out. I had apparently helped trap a village in fear of the Outside, out of fear for my life. All that time, it had been a lie. She didn’t pull out my magic for the same reason she hadn’t paid the village in actual gold: she wanted us to stay there and continue working.
I went limp in Weston’s arms, letting the pain come. It felt like he was ripping my life apart, little by little, and leaving nothing but wreckage in his wake.
He settled me into bed and slipped in beside me, gathering me up into his arms. I sobbed against him, tears dripping against his skin.
Had Granny ever actually loved me? Why had she saved me, only to betray me like she had?
This last shredded piece of my life tore into my heart. I’d never get those answers. She’d never be able to explain herself. Not that I could trust what she had to say, but gods help me, I wanted her here to make this better. I couldn’t handle this pain.
My body shook, taking the comfort from him I so desperately needed until I could calm myself once more. Despite how badly it hurt, and how ardently I wanted to give up and let him take me to the dragons for a bittersweet goodnight, I’d promised my mother. There was still surviving to do, no matter how desperately I wanted to fail.
At least I had magic. That was something—a big thing. If I could just get away from him and find another alpha, I could have that magic pulled out. It was my only chance at a brighter future.
My cheeks were still wet but my resolve hardened. I pulled Weston’s face toward mine and captured his lips. I slid my hands down his chest, aiming for the hard cock I could feel pulsing against my thigh. I craved the abyss that sex with him could give me.
“No, Aurelia.” He gently grabbed my wrist, pulling my hand up to his heart. “You’d regret this.”
“I always regret being with you. What would make this time any different?”
“I don’t want you to regret it. Not this time.” He paused. “BecauseIwouldn’t regret it this time. I had a nice time tonight,it’s why I allowed the wine to flow. I can’t let that happen again because soon we’re going to head into more dangerous areas. I also can’t ignore the things you’ve said. I want it to be clear I am not drugging you, or taking advantage of you. You are in control of your body and your mind. You’ve given your consent to me each time we’ve been together, but tonight, you’re under the influence. If or when we have sex again, I want you to have a clear head.”
“Anger is a clear head?”
“Compared to your product and wine? Yes. You get more lustful on your product. Probably on alcohol, too.”
The thing was, despite everything, I’d had a nice time tonight, too. A really nice time, with his strong, comforting presence so close and Hadriel’s jokes so funny. I’d felt included in a way I never had before. Weston had been incredibly patient, stabilizing me when I laughed too hard and nearly fell over, or adjusting how he sat so I could lean against him. He’d been watchful as well, never partaking in the wine and often looking this way or that, making sure he checked out every little disturbance he heard or felt or even just imagined. It was the kind of protective diligence I’d craved since my mother had died, the kind I thought I’d found in Granny.
None of that mattered, of course. Not anymore. I needed to get free of both my old life and Weston’s shackles. I’d have sex with Weston again, hoping to incite him enough in lust or anger to accidentally bring my magic to the forefront, but I wouldn’t take my eyes off the goal. Now I could claim my freedom in a way I never had been able to before.
Chapter 22
Aurelia
The next night, Hadriel led me to the center of the clearing we’d be bunking down in. The cook was setting up and others were preparing to erect the tent I knew was for me and Weston. He was off seeing to the sentries and setting up a perimeter to guard the pack as they slept. I had wanted to go with him and see where he was positioning people—it was knowledge I’d need to get out of here—but I couldn’t find a non-suspicious way to ask. I’d be better off just asking about it later, maybe during pillow talk or when he had his guard down.
Besides, though there hadn’t been any reports of Alexander or his people dogging our heels today and they hadn’t picked up any markings or scents when we stopped, I worried they would still be out there, waiting. I didn’t want to make a run for it until the coast was clear. Hopefully, it would be soon.
“I have to go look after my horse, love,” Hadriel said, stopping near the cooking station. “Why don’t you take over for Burt so that the food is edible.” He patted me. “We’d all appreciate it.”
Burt—whose name was actually Sylvester—glowered at Hadriel as he walked away. He didn’t shrug me off, though,saying that he planned to make chili and asking if I had any input. I did, of course, quickly taking over and using poor Sylvester as more of a sous chef than cooking partner. By the time the pack had everything squared away and were ready to eat, the chili was nearly ready and Weston was standing close, watching me work.
“Almost,” I said, stirring the pot and taking a taste. I passed the spoon onto Sylvester. “Here, see what you think?”
He did as he was told, nodding adamantly. “Best damn chili I have ever tasted. Jessab is going to be mighty threatened by you.”
“Who?”
