Freshly stitched and clothed, I could finally breathe again. The pain started to set in but every throb was a pleasurable reminder of how Slash lost control and fucked me until I passed out in the dirt, smothered in Niles’ blood. I knew Samael had figured out that most of what he cleaned off wasn’t my crimson stains and the little bit of liver I found tucked into the fat on my hip was fun.
I thought about gifting it to Aeron but unless he liked some form of liver sashimi, Niles would just have to waste away in the woods. For now.
I settled in the kitchen chair, groaning at the ache in my ass.
Daemon: I don’t think any of them has ever fucked us that hard.
Finn: Might want to make sure we get some salve or something.
I just grinned, relishing in Dark’s soft moans. That horny little shit had gotten what he finally asked for and maybe a little more. Killian was silent as ever, judging from his little corner but itdidn’t matter. For the first time, it felt like we—well, most of us—had enjoyed something together. Now, I just needed to get the same treatment from Samael and Aeron.
Well, not thesame. Slash was deliciously terrifying. Samael? Absolutely, not.
Someone snapped in my face, my first reaction to snarl at the fingers inches from my lips, Samael growling back like a goddamn animal. But, yeah, no, I deserved that. I finally came back to reality, glancing over at my other men, a smile playing on my lips.
Aeron was playing with the ring I gave him years ago, bringing back happy memories from high school. Slash was leaning against the counter next to him, still coming down from the high of letting his demon out, his hands still trembling slightly. He'd be a wreck soon, crashing hard after unleashing like that, but this was exactly what I wanted. I wanted to show them what they'd been missing—the raw, unfiltered chaos that Finn and the others had only hinted at. With me, they got the full storm.
Samael hovered nearby, probably coordinating something to cover our asses. "Okay, explain how you have all this shit handled," he demanded. "You have about five minutes."
I shifted in the chair, wincing as the stitches pulled across my side, and forced a grin. "Look, let’s start at the beginning. I think it’s the beginning, I don’t know. It’s been a while." The pain flared again, a deep ache in my shoulder where Slash had nicked me toward the end, the scalpel slipping in his frenzy. I could still feel the ghost of his body against mine, the way he'd pinned me after Niles went down, his breath hot on my neck as he took what he wanted. It had been brutal but sensual in its violence, my body responding even as the cuts stung. Now, sitting here, the adrenaline faded, leaving me sore and exposed.
"I was around for the first 16 or 18 years or so before I made Finn. Needed someone a little less dark. Dad hated us. Momloved me unconditionally, but she got sick. Dad abandoned her, and I needed a way to survive."
Mom was always so excited when I visited, always asking for Dad even when he started burying himself further into his work. That’s when I started giving him something else to clean up. If he wasn’t going to give Mom what she wanted, if he was going to leave her in that little piece of hell, I’d bring hell to him.
He'd done everything to protect his image, but nothing to hold her hand at the end. That abandonment fueled me, a fire that never went out. Creating Finn had been my escape, a fragment less twisted than I was, someone to front while I hid in the shadows, watching, planning.
"And then I found Aeron," I continued, my voice dropping as I met his eyes. "Watching him gave me something to do. I couldn’t keep my eyes off of him, but my darkness… it was too much. He was my first love.” Everyone stayed silent as I spoke, hanging off my every word. “Well, I knew him as Vincent first and then Aeron. Finn was around then. But you met Killian. Vincent is a trash name by the way."
Aeron's face paled, his fingers tightening around the ring I gave him. I thought that once I was back, I’d be able to keep all this straight, get my men to fall in love with me all over again, and live happily ever after. But that wasn’t going to happen, was it?
Samael’s frown deepened as he processed my words. "So… what, you just planned all of this?"
I shrugged, the movement pulling at a nick on my shoulder, fresh blood trickling down my chest beneath my shirt. "I’m a sociopath if anything, not weird. I wanted to play, sure, but I was also just trying to come back."
Slash slid into a seat across from me as he placed his elbows on the table. “What do you mean ‘come back’?” he asked.
I sighed and dragged a hand through my hair, my fingers catching on the sweaty curls. “I stuffed myself away and made Finn. The others fractured off of me as I tried to find someone suitable to face the world, but then they took over. I had a hard time getting back. Except when I pulled shit they couldn’t handle, it slowly made its way back to me.”
Aeron leaned over the counter, his sea-green eyes narrowing at me. “So, delivering Jenny’s lungs to the house was to drag you out?”
I nodded, wincing as the movement tugged a different stitch. “It got Daemon out here, trying to grab the driver’s seat…”
Samael cut in, his massive frame looming as he crossed his arms. “Do you mean to tell me that all this turmoil shit we’ve been through, Killian falling apart, is because you were trying to take back control? Finn and Killian fighting, Daemon trying to warn us?”
I sighed again. “Something like that. I hate all of them for what they did, which is why they’re locked away right now. It’s just me. Mostly.” They thought Killian fell apart, that Dark and Daemon couldn’t truly handle who I was. The truth was that we were all just different sides of the same dice. Killian didn’t fall apart. That alter just gave way so that it would stay intact. Killian was very much whole and in my head, plotting and readying himself for when I slipped up.
Aeron’s face twisted with hurt. “So, we’re just a game to you?”
I met his eyes, the lip ring clicking against my teeth as I bit down on my bottom lip. God, he was adorable. If someone had told me I would have fallen in love with a cannibal who had a tortured soul, I would have laughed. “I already told you that you were my first love, but Killian stole you from me. I can remember how happy you made him, but I don’t remember all of it. Dark and Daemon, too. They stole that life from me, and now I want it back.”
I chewed my lip ring harder, while trying to push down the turmoil between the alters. My doctor had warned me that it was never going to get easier, that even if I didn’t continue to fracture, I would be constantly fighting for dominance in my own body.
Creating these fuckers had been for survival but ultimately, it could end up being my downfall.
Finn: You can’t keep us locked up forever, Runo. You’re slipping.
Daemon: You’re going to break everything.
