Love might even mean losing him as he lost himself.
Was she ready for that? Or had she lost too much already?
Norah looked back down at the music sheet again. Shehadsaid she would try. And Norah never did anything halfway.
Stepping over the splintered pieces of the instrument, she went to stand at his side. She still didn’t know what to say. She didn’t know what he wanted her to say. So she took a breath, and instead of speaking, took his hand.
And though it took him a long moment, his fingers finally tightened around hers as well.
There were no games that day, nor were there any adventures or laughs at the supper table. But after Phillip had taken her hand that morning, he had hardly let go. Everywhere that he went, she had gone as well. And that night as she was getting ready for bed, Norah spoke of the day aloud to Nanny as she often did before she fell asleep.
“It makes me wonder,” she said as she stood on her bedroom balcony, “how often he smiles when he wants to cry.”
Nanny didn’t answer her, of course. But the wind whispered through the leaves of the trees that surrounded her balcony, and that made Norah feelless alone.
“He would be a good king,” she went on after a moment. “And even…” She paused and swallowed, her throat suddenly thick. “Even if it means the end of my dreams, I want to help him. He deserves it. And so do his people. And somehow, for some reason, I’m the only one who can give it to him. Why is that? Why am I the only one who can help?”
As she spoke, she realized that she was no longer speaking to Nanny, but rather, to the Maker.
“I’m not strong or clever or skilled with diplomacy,” she went on. “But for some reason, you’ve given me a task I can’t possibly be sure of finishing. And I just… I wish I knewwhy.”
How many years had she dreamed of leaving this place and never looking back? And yet, just when it seemed she might be on the cusp of finding a way to escape, she was being reeled back in. Simply because no one else could do what was being asked of her.
Almost as if it had been designed that way.
But maybe… maybe that’s what Nanny had been trying to tell her all along.
Chapter 13
Him
Two days after Phillip had smashed his violin in the library, he was still walking around with the disposition of a bear. And though Norah had tried to be kind and empathetic, they were running out of time. This new loss had proved that.
“Okay, I need this to stop,” she said that evening when Phillip refused to move from his seat in the larger library. He was glaring down at a map he was sketching of the latest locations that the pirate clans had been reported to be. And ithadbeen a thoughtful gesture.
Two days ago.
When he’d begun.
“You need to get up and do something else,” Norah said. She had been seated across from him for most of the day, and while she loved reading, she had memorized the location of nearly every book in the room. “And if you mope for one more minute,” she added, “I’m going to lose my mind and start scribbling on the walls.”
Still, he ignored her.
“Fine,” Norah said, strutting over to the walls, holding apencil. And though she never would have done so in her right mind, she was no longer feeling in her right mind. Because if she had to spend one more minute in this ridiculous room–
She had his attention, she realized with glee. He hadn’t moved a muscle, but he was glaring at her now instead of at the map.
She also had an idea.
“You know what?” she said, putting the pencil down. “If you’re not even going totryto talk to me, two can play that game.” She swept back over to the book she’d been reading by the hearth and picked it up. Leafing through the pages, she searched for a few moments before finding what she was looking for.
When she returned to the table, she sat down beside him and pointed triumphantly at a word in the book.
Outside.
He glowered at her, and she could almost hear him saying that going out was what had gotten them into trouble in the first place.
But Norah wasn’t about to be defeated. She flipped back a few pages. Then she held the book out, and when he looked at her again, she pointed to her desired words in order.
