Elizabeth
Elizabethstartedthemorningby preparing for a walk. It would not be long before the temperature would drop enough to prevent her from going out early. She preferred to take a stroll before breaking her fast. The activity made her more alert, and her mood was always improved afterward.
The Netherfield party called several times a week. Those visits, combined with other social engagements, meant the ladies of Longbourn were frequently in the company of Mr. Bingley and Mr. Darcy. With each meeting, Jane’s affection for Mr. Bingley deepened, whilst Elizabeth’s admiration for Mr. Darcy steadily grew.
Mr. Darcy appeared to be everything a gentleman ought to be. He was kind, he listened without condescension, and he treated her like an intelligent woman whose opinions had value. Best of all, he made her feel she was worth more than a pleasing face. Oh, she knew that he would likely offer her no more than friendship. They spoke often enough of his estate, his family, and his responsibilities that she knew he was expected to marry far above her station.
And what is my station, truly?she mused.Can I call myself the daughter of a gentleman when I do not know my parentage?Mr. Bennet was her father for all intents and purposes, but he was not related to Elizabeth by blood. Neither were her mother, sisters, or brother. Her adopted parents had never told their other children the truth about Elizabeth’s origins…as far as she knew. If Jane had been informed, she felt sure her elder sister would have approached her long ago.
How would Mr. Darcy react if he knew she did not know where she came from? She had no people, at least so far as she knew. And if she had not lost her family in a carriage accident, how had she become separated from them? What had caused the wound on her head? And what tragedy had prevented her family from seeking her when she disappeared?
Her hand came up to touch the thick scar on her head.Perhaps they could not afford to find me,she reasoned.Perhaps I am no more than the daughter of a poor tenant.Yet, Mr. Bennet had remarked about her genteel speech when he told her the truth, suggesting that it likely indicated she had received an education or that her family was gently bred.
Why do I even consider such things in connection with Mr. Darcy?she wondered.He has not expressed any interest in me beyond friendship and will most probably never do so.
Jane’s courtship seemed promising, however. Mr. Bingley paid the eldest Bennet sister much attention. His admiration was plain to see, making it clear to everyone that he preferred that lady’s company to any other’s. And Jane reciprocated his affection.
Charlotte had pressed Jane to make no secret of her regard. “You had much better secure him,” she said one evening at Lucas Lodge. “A man needs a little help to come to the point, and if he has any doubt about your feelings, he will not propose for fear of rejection. They are very sensitive creatures, you know…not suited to disappointment.”
The three young ladies laughed together. “How am I to do so whilst still being true to my nature?” Jane asked when their mirth was spent. “It is not proper for a lady to be so forward, and I am naturally reserved.”
“Save your best smiles for him,” Charlotte advised. “Look at him differently than you do anyone else. I know that you are kind to everyone, Jane. I would wager that if you ever truly disliked anyone, they would never know it.”
“I shall try,” Jane promised. And she had. Elizabeth’s sister’s demeanor changed subtly. Her countenance lit up whenever Mr. Bingley came near, and her smiles, though still frequent, were particularly lovely when she bestowed them upon her suitor. In response, the gentleman pursued her more vigorously. The Bennets had every hope that a proposal would be imminent.
Yet one thing troubled Elizabeth. Though his admiration for Jane could not be denied, he still hovered around Elizabeth during gatherings whenever he was not at Jane’s side. He listened to her conversations with a furrowed brow, observed her curiously from across the room, and asked strange questions about her childhood.
“Will you tell me where you grew up, Miss Elizabeth?” he asked her one day.
Elizabeth wondered what he could mean. He knew the Bennets had dwelt in Derbyshire until they came to Longbourn.Could he know I am not truly a Bennet?She responded vaguely, saying something about spending her formative years traipsing all over Longbourn’s fields, but had the impression that he was not satisfied with her answer.
She did not think he had any romantic feelings for her. Indeed, it appeared abundantly clear that he adoredJane,not her younger sister. Why, then, did he display such an intense interest in Elizabeth?
She crested the summit of Oakham Mount and turned in the direction of Netherfield Park. The clear, cold morning meant she could see for some distance and the top of the manor house was just visible above the trees. Elizabeth wondered if the occupants of the house had risen yet, or if they kept to town hours.
Movement in the distance drew her attention, and she watched as a large brown horse thundered toward where she stood. She recognized Mr. Darcy, and an involuntary smile spread across her face.
The gentleman slowed to a stop and dismounted before her. “Miss Elizabeth,” he greeted, “good morning.”
“The same to you, sir!” she replied pleasantly. “And a fine morning it is. Not too cold yet.”
“There is certainly a chill in the air, but nothing unbearable,” he agreed. “Derbyshire is much colder than Hertfordshire this time of year. Pemberley is amongst the peaks, as we have discussed, and so we see plenty of snow and frost during the colder weather.”
“I confess, I adore the snow.” Elizabeth gestured to a fallen log and moved to sit. He followed, lowering himself to sit upon the seat beside her whilst keeping the proper distance between them. “Hertfordshire never gets enough to more than frolic in a few drifts. I long for mounds of snow into which I might throw myself and enough to form a few balls to lob at my sisters.”
“Yes, you must certainly miss such things from Lambton.”
He did not know the effect his words had on her. Elizabeth bit her lip and looked away, unsure of how to reply. In the end, she instead asked him to speak of his favorite winter traditions.
“We have a large sleigh that we use to travel during the winter,” he said. “It is red, blue, and cream. The carriage horses are used to pull it, and my sister and I like nothing better than visiting tenants or going to church in the sleigh, listening to the bells tinkling from the horses’ harnesses.”
“I can almost picture it,” Elizabeth replied. “It sounds delightful. What else do you enjoy?”
“We always have a pudding for Christmas, and we have chosen the perfect yule log every year for as long as I can remember. There are Twelfth Night balls, of course.”
“What of presents? Not all families exchange gifts during the holy season.” The Bennets did, and Elizabeth adored the practice.
Darcy smiled. “We do exchange gifts. It is Georgiana’s favorite tradition. She spends hours considering what to give each member of our family, for she wishes what she chooses to have meaning and not simply be a token of familial expectation.”
