Which makes me laugh despite everything. A real laugh that bubbles up from my chest.
How on earth can he make me comfortable enough to laugh here, in a vampire compound, after the day we’ve had? Maybe because when I’m with him, even in what feels like a dangerous place, I feel at home.
That’s a wild thought. Risky to think. Also far too soon—we barely know each other, really.
It’s probably just the leftovers from the multiple rushes of adrenaline today. The crash after all that terror.
At the same time, I don’t care if it’s that same adrenaline that has me throwing my arms around his neck now. Pulling him close.
So strange—the glamour even makes his hair feel like normal hair instead of the smooth, inhuman surface I usually encounter when my fingers brush against Romulus’s sleeping face on the back of his head.
I want to get lost in him completely. Want to wash away all the terrors and uncertainties that lie outside that door.
He drops his lips to mine so I can kiss him, but before I’ve gotten more than a taste, he’s pulling back again.
He frames my face with his large, strong hands and searches my eyes, his expression serious. Concerned.
“How are you really, though, my beautiful one?” His voice is gentle. “Everything has been happening so fast. I want nothing more than to fall into bed with you?—”
“So let’s,” I interrupt, reaching up on tiptoes to kiss him again. To stop the talking and just feel.
But he pulls away just before I can make contact, and I let out a little discontented whine that’s embarrassing.
“I want to connect with you in every way,” he says, smoothing my hair back from my face with tender fingers. “But there were many shocks today. I have seen humans after battle before. It can take hours for the effects to be felt. For the body to process the fear.”
Even as he says the words, I start to tremble. Like he’s given my body permission to fall apart.
“Come,” he says gently, reaching down for my hand to draw me toward the attached bathroom.
It’s as black and gray as the bedroom—black marble floors, gray walls, chrome fixtures. There’s both a deep soaking tub and a large, separate shower. The shower is enormous—easily big enough for four people, with a tiled bench along one wall and multiple showerheads positioned at different heights and angles.
“Big enough for two,” he says, sliding his hand down my curves possessively. “After the day you’ve had, you deserve to relax.” He leans in to whisper against my ear, his breath warm. “Let me wash it all away.”
I shiver this time from good feelings, not remembered terror.
I’ve almost forgotten this side of Remus. But this is how he was when I first got to know him, back at the castle. Before any of the craziness escalated. Before I met Romulus or his family orwe had to run for our lives. Attentive. Tender. Focused entirely on my pleasure, my comfort.
He shifts behind me and tugs my shirt over my head in one smooth motion. I relax back against his chest automatically. The bathroom is cold—vampire cold, no body heat warming these spaces—so I shiver.
“Don’t be sweet and gentle now,” I whisper, crossing my arms self-consciously to cover my stomach. “I can’t bear it.”
Tears cluster in my eyes, hot and unwelcome.
“Would you rather I was a beast?” he murmurs, turning me around to face him after peeling off the rest of my outer clothes—my jeans sliding down my legs.
He’s undressed too, I realize with a start. When did that happen? I blink, struggling not to look down at his body. Failing.
I’m still wearing my bra and underwear, but somehow I’ve never felt so bared and naked before him. I don’t know if it’s just because I’m so exhausted by everything that’s happened today, but I feel terribly vulnerable. Raw.
“Today must have been terrifying for you,” he says as if reading my mind. His voice is so gentle it makes my chest ache.
I nod, my throat suddenly clogged with emotion. “I was so worried—” I cut off, almost hiccupping. “Ksenia, I mean, she had a baby right in front of me. On a helicopter that was about to go down. And then we were in this whole other?—”
My brain scrambles for the words to even describe it.
“—place where these huge flying things were attacking us, and you weren’t there. You were outside fighting and I couldn’t see you and I thought—I thought?—”
His arms close around me and shut off my increasingly frantic words. Holding me tight and safe.
