Going out to the deck in backyard, I slammed the door behind me and took a seat in the gazebo. Right now, I was like a bottle of Coke that had been shaken up with the lid still on. I was ready to explode on any and everybody, and my family knew that, so I wasn’t sure why Vani wanted to keep poking the bear.
Every time Drek tried to leave me, I got like this. Angry in a way that even I didn’t understand. The thought of losing Drek twisted something deep and dark inside of me, which was why it was best for planet Earth and beyond for us to be together. When I wasn’t with her, I was reckless and did shit on impulse. Normally, I was careful, logical, thought everything out but when I was like this? The world just needed to stay the fuck out of my way. It had been two long ass days, and I had been ducked off at my momma’s crib the entire time.
“Baby,” my mother joined me minutes later, taking a seat next to me. “You need to apologize to your sister.”
The tears stung my eyes as I looked over at her. “The only person I’m apologizing to is Dreka. Ain’t nobody getting shit out of me until I have her back. Ma, you know I don’t play about that girl.”
“But you did, Xyleek,” she spoke in that soothing, motherly tone. “You played with her a lot, and so her reaction to finding out something like this…of course it’s going to be extreme. I know how serious you were this time, but she doesn’t know that. She doesn’t know that you really were trying to do the right thing, but lying is lying, no matter if it was for a good reason or not.”
“I need her,” I hoarsely whispered with tears falling down my face. My mom, sister, and Drek were the only women I’d ever cry in front of.
She scooted closer, rubbing my back comfortingly. “I know you do. You always have. But you have to do better, Xy. You have to be honest with her, no matter how mad you think she gon’ get or how bad it may hurt her. Had you been honest and upfront about this situation, then there’s a good chance she wouldn’t have run off like this.”
“I can’t change that I lied now!”
“You can’t but let this be a lesson moving forward to stop lying to her. If…when she comes back, you have to be completely honest from now on.”
I wasn’t tryna hear the shit my mom was talking about either for real. When my phone started ringing with a call from Jah, I got excited, thinking he had some good news.
“Please tell me you found her,”I answered right away.
“Uh…nah. We found your car though.”
“Was she in it?”
“Nah but uh…she fucked yo shit up, gang,”he chuckled a little. “Sis got on her Jazmine Sullivan shit and bust ya windows out, slashed ya tires, fucked up the interior.”
“Jah, I don’t give a fuck about none of that. It’s just a car, I got a hunnid more of those. Where isshe?!”
“I don’t know! Yo car was left in a parking lot near Diggs Park, but I’m telling you, there’s no sign of her.”
“Don’t call my fuckin’ phone again unless you have something to tell me aboutDrek!”I snapped, ending the call and throwing my phone clean across the yard. “FUCK!”
My whole body was tense with the veins in my neck pulsing while I paced circles in the gazebo like a caged animal. That’s exactly how I felt. When I was with Drek, I felt free as a bird but without her? I wasn’t shit. I wasn’t even mad that she’d damaged my car. That temper of hers matched mine too well, and deep down, I knew I’d pushed her straight to that point. Hearing she tore my shit up made me proud if I’m being honest. That was my damn woman, and I wouldn’t expect shit less outta her.
My mom got up to retrieve my phone, dropping it on the couch. “It’s not broke, and don’t break it because you’re angry. How she gon’ call you if your phone broke? I’m going to make some lunch. You want anything?”
“Ma, I can’t…” I shook my head, blowing out a deep breath. “I can’t fuckin’ eat right now.”
She shrugged and went back inside, leaving me to my own thoughts. Getting an idea, I picked my phone up and went to Raven’s contact. I never had to call that girl before, but I knew she was joined to Drek’s right hip while Makenna occupied the left. Ken wasn’t doing shit on my behalf to help me get to Drek, but maybe Rae would. When I called and the phone rang, a little hope creeped into my chest.
“Don’t be calling my best friend’s phone, Xyleek,”Drek answered, instantly making my dick hard.“And when the hell did you download that tracking app on my fuckin’ phone?!”
“Angel. Where you at? I need you,”I told her, ignoring her question.
“No, what the fuck youneedis a better gahdamn publicist. You let that bitch put that shit out there, making me look like a dumb bitch, yet again!”
Her voice was ice cold, cutting through the little bit of hope I did have. Even still, hearing her voice calmed my spirit so much.
“I didn’t know she was gon’ do that. You know I’d never let anyone clown you on purpose, Drek.”
“Fuck you, nigga! That’s all I needed, another fuckin’ headline about me beingthe stupid bitchthat keeps taking yo cheating ass back!”
“I wasn’t cheating, Angel! All the other times, yeah, I was giving dick to bitches but this time, that’s not the case. I swear on our future kids, it wasn’t like that with her. Baby, please, please just tell me where you are so I can come see you and we can do this face-to-face,”I pleaded, dropping to my knees like she could see me.“I’m begging you, Drek.”
“You don’t need to see me, you need to see a therapist, you sick ass muthafucka!”she spat, her tone telling me that she wasn’t about to let me know where she was.
“You’re right, I probably do need therapy to figure out why I’m dumb as fuck. I’ll do that, Angel, I promise I will. I want you, Rahdreka. I need you more than I’ve ever needed anything in my life. I’m going crazy without you,”my voice softened as tears rolled down my face again.“Fuck, Drek, I’m sorry! But my mom will tell you, I had the right intentions this time. I just went about the shit all fucked up, and I take full responsibility for my actions. I shouldn’t have lied, baby. Just tell me where you are.”
