Page 134 of No Holds Barred


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Rolling her eyes, Hope tossed her head back into the pillow and just breathed. This was going to take a lot out of her, andshe was so tired of playing games. “Here’s the deal, Rach. I’m not sure we’re going to go back to the way things were before. Right now, I have zero desire to see you or be around you. You treated me like dirt for an entire year. You told me everything was my fault, and for a time, I believed you. I believed everything.”

“You cheated on him,” Rachel interrupted her.

Hope groaned and clenched her teeth together. “Is that going to be your response to everything?”

“You’re going to have to convince me that you didn’t.”

“Did Rex tell you that I cheated?” Hope held her breath, hoping that she was trusting Rex to have held to the truth of the matter. He might have been mad and made stupid decisions like she did, but he wasn’t ever someone who wouldn’t tell the truth when he knew it.

“No.”

That answer solidified Rex in Hope’s mind and heart. He truly was a good person underneath all of his problems, all of the baggage that he brought into their relationship, and all the struggles they’d endured.

“Rex and I made the decision together to open our marriage, and I know you don’t understand that. It’s not something you’d do, but we did it.”

“And came to regret it.”

Hope sighed heavily. “Yes, Rach, I think both of us came to regret it. But your opinion on the matter doesn’t really have any weight. Because it wasmymarriage, not yours. And Rex and I talked about it before we did it. We were having issues and problems well before then. I just didn’t tell you about them.”

And why was that? She’d always thought of Rachel as her best friend, but she’d withheld that information from Rachel for years. Hope worried her lower lip, and she looked again at Eva, at her beautiful baby and the best thing to come out of that marriage that had failed so spectacularly.

That should have been the first tip-off that things weren’t right between her and Rachel, but then again, she was always good at avoiding the truth. Maybe Carol or Evelyn could offer some extra insight into why Rachel was acting this way. Hope settled into the bed.

“You allowing Rex to stay with you after we separated, letting Eva be there, and then not telling me about it when you knew I was frantic? That’s unforgivable to me, nearly. You’d have to prove that you truly thought I was a danger to her, and I’m not sure how you’ll prove that.” Hope listened for any guilt or admission of Rachel’s failures in her response, but instead she was met with silence.

“Look,” Hope started, frustration filling her voice “You can either talk with me or not, but if you’re not willing to budge on anything you think, then I really don’t understand the point of this phone conversation.”

“You’re not budging.”

“I don’t have to.” Hope snapped her mouth shut. She hadn’t expected herself to say that, but she was certainly sliding into old habits now. “I don’t need you to be a part of my life, Rach. I’m doing perfectly fine without you.”

“No, you’re not.”

“I am,” Hope reaffirmed. “My life is going really well. Rex and I have found a balance, and we’re working well together and co-parenting well. We’re good, actually, we’re really good.” Hope bit her lip, as she waited to say the next part. She hadn’t been certain she’d wanted to tell Rachel, but why the hell not? She could get whatever reaction Rachel was going to have out of the way and deal with the consequences now rather than later. “And I’m dating again.”

“You’re what?” Rachel squeaked the accusation.

“Rex is too, so don’t just think it’s me.”

“Who are you dating? Are you sure you’re ready?”

Hope’s stomach churned. “I wasn’t sure in the beginning, no. But sometimes when a certain person walks into your life, you can’t deny the attraction or the love, and you just have to stop holding back from it.”

“You’re withher, aren’t you?” The sneer was there.

Hope’s stomach plummeted. “Yes, I am. We haven’t been together very long.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“You don’t have to.” Hope stared at the back of Eva’s head, wishing she could pull Eva over and snuggle with her, anything to make this conversation easier. “I’m in love, Rach.”

“Like you loved Rex?”

“No, it’s different. And we’re committed to trying to make this work.”

“To trying…” Rachel repeated.

“Not just to trying.” Hope groaned in frustration. She wasn’t doing this well. “We’re going to make it work. We’re just taking it slow and keeping it quiet for right now.”