“Sounds like a smart girl,” he says.
“Yeah,” I chuckle.
We sit quietly for a moment; he removes the ice from his hand and wriggles his fingers before forming a fist, testing out the movements.
“All okay?” I ask.
He nods. “Zero damage, it’s safe to say that Kyle has a really weak nose. Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” I nod, “just annoyed at myself.”
“Why?”
“I hate that my first guy kiss was with him; I don’t want to ever think about him again, but he’ll always be my first.”
“You don’t have to count it; you can have a proper first kiss on your own terms.”
“Yeah, maybe,” I say, “I just have to find someone who wants to kiss me…”
“I want to kiss you…” Stephen whispers.
His voice was so soft I worry I misheard him, or it was my imagination playing tricks on me.
“What did you say?”
“I want to kiss you. Fuck, Donovan, I wish I could kiss you.”
My heart skips a beat, and I finally understand that saying, that feeling of my heart losing rhythm in my chest. I’m holding my breath, not wanting to breathe and scare the moment away.
“Why can’t you?”
“Donovan.” Pain is written across his face, like this is physically hurting him. “I can’t give you a real relationship, if anything were to ever happen between us, I’d need to keep it quiet. You deserve more than being someone’s secret, I can’t ask that of you, not when you’ve finally got the opportunity to be out.”
I’m hearing his words, but all my brain is focusing on is the fact that he wants to kiss me.
“Can you kiss me anyway?” I ask.
His breath hitches. “Don’t look at me like that, I won’t be able to say no.”
“Please, Stephen… I want you to kiss me.”
He hesitates for a moment, his gaze darting between my eyes and lips.
“Fuck it,” he murmurs. He cups my face with his hands and brings our foreheads together, our breath mingling. “Are you sure you want this?”
“Yes,” I whisper, “I’ve never wanted anything more in my life.”
His lips brush mine in a chaste kiss, so soft and gentle, before he claims them fully. He slowly glides his tongue along my lips and I open for him, enjoying the moan he makes when he tastes me. I’m surrounded by his scent, and the feel of his hands as they caress my cheek and into my hair. Sensations are running all through my body and my dick is hardening as the kiss deepens.
He pulls back, leaving a few more chaste kisses in his wake before pressing our foreheads together again.
“How was that for a first kiss?” he whispers.
The fact that I’m still reeling from it and can’t even form an answer must tell him all he needs to know.
He lets out a soft chuckle. “We should probably get some sleep; it’s been an eventful night.”
“Okay,” I say, grateful I can at least say something.
